I’d been awake for just over an hour. Emma was still on my chest, sound asleep. She was so damn beautiful to look at that it actually hurt. How the hell did I manage to end up with this beautiful girl?
She stirred in her sleep as her eyes slowly opened.
“Morning,” I whispered into her hair.
“Morning,” she replied as she stretched. “Can we just stay like this for the rest of the day? You’re kind of comfortable.”
“Fine by me.”
She smiled as she rested her head back on my chest. Her fingers started tracing the tattoos covering my left arm. “I’ve never really taken the time to look at your tattoos. I thought it was just one big tattoo, but it’s not. It’s a bunch of smaller ones.”
“It is.”
“What do they mean?” she asked.
“A lot of different things. Most of them are reminders of things in my life that I don’t want to forget. Others are just designs that I drew and liked enough to tattoo permanently on myself.”
“Did you do them all yourself?”
“Most of them. The ones that I couldn’t reach I had my friend from the shop do. Tony is wicked talented.”
“That’s incredible.”
“You told me you loved me last night in your sleep,” I blurted out.
Her body tensed up at my words. Finally, she said, “It’s because I do. I know we’re young, and there are so many things fighting against us, but I don’t care. I know what I feel, Jesse. I love you.”
“You know when I saw you that first day of school in the parking lot?”
She nodded. “Of course.”
“That wasn’t the first time we met.”
She raised her head to look at me. “I’m pretty sure it was. I think I’d remember meeting you before then.”
“It was a long time ago, but I never forgot you. You were the first person who ever told me I wasn’t good enough.”
“What on earth are you talking about? I would never say that to you.”
“You were too little to realize what you were saying, but I never forgot your face or your words. We were just little. My mom took me to the nice park on your side of town to play for the day, and you were there with your mom. You were playing in the sandbox, and I wanted to play with you. Even at six years old, I was drawn to you. You were the prettiest girl I’d ever seen. Instead of playing with me, you told me that I was trash, and I didn’t belong at your park. You ran off after that, but I never forgot what you said. That’s why I was so distant with you when we met. I expected you to be a stuck-up bitch, but you weren’t. Instead, I found out that you are one of the kindest people I’ve ever known. I love you, Emma, even if I shouldn’t. I’ve battled with myself over this time and time again, but I can’t deny it any longer.” A tear slipped down her cheek, and I reached up to wipe it away.
“I’m so sorry, Jesse. I was only a child, and I had no idea what I was saying.”
“It’s okay. You taught me that I needed to be strong to survive this world, and I owe you for that.”
“I made you bitter toward the world.”
“No, you didn’t. You were just the first of many to look down on me. Despite how we met, you’ve shown me that it’s okay to care about someone, to love someone, because there are people who come into your life who deserve to be loved. They are the ones worth taking a chance on, hoping you don’t end up broken.”
She grabbed my face and kissed me. “I love you, Jesse. I’ll never leave you. There’s something between us that ties us together.”
“I like being tied to you. Just promise not to shatter me.”
“I won’t.”
What came after that wasn’t sex. It was so much more. Where words failed, our bodies showed just how much we loved each other. Sex was nice, but it was nothing compared to this. We were one.
––––––––
We spent the rest of the weekend exploring London and spending time with my dad and his bandmates. I’d grown up around those guys, and they felt more like family to me than my own mother did. When it was time to leave, I cried. I wasn’t ready to leave my dad or the pure bliss that I’d found in London.
After our talk on Saturday morning, I felt closer to Jesse than ever. This boy had my heart, and I loved it. There was no one else in the world who could ever compare to him. Every look, every touch between us seemed to mean so much more. He loved me, and I loved him. For those few short days, life was perfect.
The trip back to California was uneventful. As the hours passed, a sense of foreboding came over me. Everything had changed, but at the same time, things were still the same.
Tomorrow, Jesse would be allowed back in school where everyone hated him for what he’d done to Todd. I frowned as I thought of the fight I’d had with Todd when I finally had a chance to corner him and let him know just what I thought of him. He’d claimed that he was only trying to protect me because he cared, but I wasn’t buying it. He was as obsessed with status as my mother was, and I wanted nothing to do with it. I had told him to stay away from me, and so far, he had. I just hoped that it would last.