Racing for Freedom

chapter Thirteen





I wake the next morning and find Slade already awake. He’s in the kitchen, leaning against the bench with a new carton of milk in his hands. He waves it at me when he sees me and I smile. “Milk, thanks,” I murmur.

“I couldn’t leave you without milk, it wouldn’t be very kind of a guest to do that.”

He emphasizes the word guest and I wince. He must have heard me talking to Lucas last night when I said he wasn’t staying long.

“I didn’t mean that last night, you can stay as long as you need.”

He pours the milk into his coffee and then nods at me, indicating the coffee mug.

“Please.”

“So I’m not just a guest?”

“Look, Slade, we had a deal and you won. I’m not going to kick you out, I’d rather have a housemate I know, than a housemate I don’t.”

“Fair enough,” he says meeting my gaze. “Your friend doesn’t seem happy about that.”

“He’ll be fine, he’ll get over it, I’m sure.”

“How come you aren’t together with him?”

“It’s….complicated.”

Slade tilts his head to the side and stares at me intently. “How?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

He sips his coffee, still staring at me with those stupid aqua eyes. I sip mine too, looking away.

“You’ve slept with him though, haven’t you?”

I turn my eyes back to his and swallow, how does he know that? Is it so obvious?

“Once and I told him it couldn’t happen again. The feelings aren’t there. I care about him, I love him as a friend, and yeah, there are times I’ve wanted more, but it’s not enough. I won’t hurt him.”

“You’re too good a person, Dash.”

“Maybe, or maybe I’ve just lived with enough hurt to know I don’t want to inflict it on anyone else.”

His eyes grow pained and he looks away. Great. Time to change the subject.

“What about you Slade, why haven’t you settled down and moved in with someone?”

“Been busy with racing.”

“Have you lived with your dad the whole time?” I ask, sliding my bottom onto the bench.

“No, when we moved away I moved out on my own, but when he wanted to come back here, I knew I’d have to live with him for a few months.”

“What about Kandee?”

He snorts. “What about her?”

“Well you two seem…err…close.”

He laughs and the sound fills my ears with joy, because it’s a real laugh, not a mocking laugh. “Kandee is fun, Dashy. That’s it.”

“Oh.”

“Why, you up for the challenge of winning my heart?”

I smirk at him and he gives me a warm smile, the first I’ve seen in a long, long time.

“Nah, I think I’ll leave that up to Kandee.”

He chuckles. “Scared?”

“Of you? Nope!”

“You should be,” he murmurs.

“I know you all too well, Slade.”

He goes silent a moment and then says, “Not anymore you don’t.”

I look up at him and search his face. His features are hard now, and he’s looking down into his coffee. It’s like he has so much he wants to say, but can’t.

“Slade, what are those bruises on your body?”

He jerks and shoots me a glare so horrible I flinch. “None of your business, ok?”

“I just…”

“Don’t, Dasha. My life isn’t yours anymore. You know nothing about me now.”

I look away painfully as he turns and walks out of the room. He’s right though, I don’t know anything about him anymore and it hurts me. It hurts me to my very core.