I didn’t spend a lot of time embracing the touchy feely. I tended to feel awkward and weird when forced to deal with it. Even when Damien had said I love you, I never felt entirely comfortable with it, so it was my natural reaction to pull away.
But there was something about the way Garrett Bellows looked at me that made running the last thing I wanted to do.
“I should have called you, Ri. Because after what we said to each other, you deserved to hear every second of every day that I feel the same way. That you’re my girl. That we’ll be together until you decide you can do better and kick me to the curb.” He tugged on my arm again before moving his arms around me.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered before kissing the side of my mouth softly. He let his lips linger there, not deepening the kiss but with an aching tenderness that made my knees buckle.
“Stop saying you’re sorry. It’s annoying,” I said huskily after he moved away.
“It annoys you, huh? What else is new?” he teased before his face darkened. “I am sorry. But Gracie,”
“Gracie needed you. I get it,” I finished for him.
“We weren’t hooking up, Riley. We were never together like that. I just saw in her something that reminded me way too much of myself. I just wanted to help I guess,” he said, sounding like the boy who had lost his world and didn’t know what to do about it. It made me sad and angry and scared. All for him.
“I get that now. You’re a good guy, Garrett,” I said with a small smile.
Garrett gave me a crooked grin. “Just don’t tell anyone,” he quipped.
I stood there in the circle of his arms, knowing this is where I wanted to be. That even in the worst of circumstances he was always there. He was steadfast and loyal and never, ever wavered.
How many people could say they’d do the same?
Because this man had proved time and time again that he could handle the ugly that life threw at him and that was the kind of person I wanted in my life.
“I’d better get in there,” I told him, not wanting to move away from him, but knowing that I should. That there was someone else I needed to make things right with.
“Yeah, you should.” He didn’t move in to kiss me. In fact, he backed up and dropped his arms from around me. But I didn’t feel like I was being rejected. In fact, it felt almost like a promise of something more. Of something that we would build on…soon.
“Can I see you later?” he asked me, sounding hesitant, as though bracing himself for my rebuff.
“Yeah, I’d like that,” I said.
“Okay then. I’ll call you tonight. You’ll answer, right?” he asked is light tone but he meant what he asked. He needed the validation that I wouldn’t turn him down again.
“Damn straight,” I said fiercely, earning me a laugh.
“Cool,” Garrett nodded, flipping his keys around on his finger. “Talk to you then.” He gave me a salute and I headed to the front door finding Gracie standing there, her hands shoved into the pockets of an oversized sweater.
Her long, blonde hair was lank and lifeless and her face was pale but her eyes were anything but remote.
“Hey, G,” I said not turning to watch Garrett drive away even as she lifted her hand to wave him off.
Once the sound of Garrett’s van disappeared, Gracie held open the door and let me inside. The house was just as I pictured the place where Gracie grew up. It was prim and proper. Everything tidy and in its place. There were framed family portraits on the shelves, Christmas cards made into a wreathe on the wall.
Gracie led me into the living room where a fire burned in a huge fireplace and a magnificent Christmas tree stood in the corner. It’s a very WASPy Christmas! I thought and then mentally scolded myself for being unkind. I didn’t know her parents; maybe they were very nice people despite the Keeping Up with the Joneses air that their home gave off.
“My parents are out to dinner. Thank freaking god! They’re driving me nuts!” Gracie said on a sigh, indicating for me to take a seat. Her easy naturalness threw me after months of fake civility.