“I knew she was drinking and partying too much. I thought Vivian had contacted her sister and they were handling it,” I said stupidly, realizing that so much was going on while I was completely oblivious.
“Yeah, that didn’t go so well. And she’s been getting steadily worse. After you and I fought before I left Maryland, I realized you were right about my partying. Sure I wasn’t where I used to be, but it wouldn’t take much for me to find myself right back on the edge. And then I saw Gracie and I saw in her the person I used to be. The person I was afraid I would become again. So I stopped. All of it. The smoking, the drinking. I haven’t had a joint or a beer since Maryland. I started going to AA meetings. I tried taking Gracie with me a few times but it didn’t pan out. She’s in serious denial right now. It sucks watching someone you care about lose it like that,” Garrett’s tone implied he felt his own guilt.
I was in a state of shock. Garrett had quit smoking. Quit drinking. He was on the straight and narrow. Because of what I said.
And during his own struggles with sobriety he had been looking after my friend. He had been doing something, I should have been. I really was a shitty friend and overall human being.
“Stop it, Riley. I know you’re hating on yourself right now. But you were dealing with your own shit. Just stop, please,” he pleaded softly and then I stopped thinking again.
“Riley!” Maysie’s panicked call pulled me out of my Garrett induced haze and out of his arms. Maysie pushed through the kitchen door and I knew instantly something was very, very wrong. Her face was a scary shade of white and she looked…stricken. That was the only word that came to mind when I saw her.
She didn’t even register that I was standing with Garrett, our mouths bruised and red, and my eyes glassy from desire. Maysie grabbed me and I felt her terror.
“It’s Gracie! She stopped breathing!” she cried, pulling me after her into the restaurant. Garrett immediately moved into action and pushed past us to run through the kitchen and into the front of the bar. Maysie and I ran after him and the place was in complete chaos.
Moore was trying to corral people off to the side but it was still bedlam. Maysie’s grip on my hand was painful as she dragged me to the front doors. There was a ring of people around a spot on the sidewalk. I recognized Vivian sobbing into Cole’s chest. There was Jaz and Dina as well as a few people from the kitchen crew.
I pushed through them and thought I was going to throw up. Jordan had his phone out and was obviously talking to a dispatcher. Mitch was knelt beside Gracie, his fingers pinching her nose as he breathed into her mouth.
My friend looked like a broken doll lying there on the sidewalk. Her blonde hair fanned around her as though she had purposefully arranged it like that. Her face was ashen and her lips blue. She looked dead.
My god, Gracie looked dead.
Garrett fell to his knees on the other side of her body and he looked ready to fall apart. He watched helplessly as Mitch breathed five times into her mouth and then listened at her mouth. Then he would take her pulse and start chest compressions.
I stood there, helpless, struck dumb by the utter tragedy that unfolded in front of me. Garrett pulled at his hair and let out a strangled howl that made my skin prickle.
I had never felt so useless in my entire life as I watched my friend’s life drain from her on the cold sidewalk. I barely registered when the paramedics arrived and wheeled her into an ambulance. I saw Garrett jump into the back with Gracie, holding her hand and talking to her the entire time.
Maysie pulled on my hand, saying something about meeting them at the hospital. I didn’t move. I could only stand there and watch as the flashing lights disappeared around the corner.
“Riley! Come on!” Maysie said, near hysterics. Vivian was freaking out and Cole was trying to get her to his car. Jordan had his arm around Maysie but she wouldn’t let go of my hand.
And I just continued to stand there, staring into the distance where Gracie and Garrett disappeared.