Those sweet brown eyes that held so much hope but no promise.
Leaning her head against her headboard, she closed her eyes, causing her tears to roll down the sides of her face, falling into her ears. Bringing her hair out from behind her ear, she ran it along her nose as her tears fell, something she always did when she was nervous. She had done it since she was a kid and had thought she was over it, but apparently that was only because her hair had been in a pixie cut. As soon as it had grown long enough for her to rub along her nose, she was doing it again. It was a comfort thing. Something her mom did to her every night before bed.
As her lip trembled, she closed her eyes tightly and wished like hell she hadn’t told him about the baby. She hadn’t told anyone, not a soul, but in a matter of seconds, not only the father but her brother’s wife knew. Of course, Lacey was on her, fishing for information, wanting to fix her. But Lacey really needed to worry about herself. Yeah, she had seemed a lot different than she had been when Kacey left before the weekend, but still. She was in no way, shape, or form in any place to try to talk about feelings. Kacey was probably really wrong for saying that to Lacey too and needed to apologize, but for now, she’d lie alone with her thoughts. Trying to come to terms with how she was going to handle tomorrow and the rest of the season.
A part of her considered quitting, but that would be giving Jordie more power over her. She couldn’t let that happen. He already had so much. She needed to take it back, but she was unsure how.
How did you stop loving someone?
Even if they were toxic for you.
When she heard the strum of a guitar, her head popped up in surprise since it was coming from Mena’s room. She was supposed to be sleeping; Lacey had put her down hours ago. She glanced at the time to be sure and she was right, so what the hell was going on? Standing up, she opened her door and looked down the hall. Lacey was at the door, the music louder now, and soon Kacey was closing the distance between them to see what she was looking at. Before she could reach the doorway though, Lacey turned, stilling her with a look before pressing her finger to her mouth in a quieting motion.
Perplexed, she looked past Lacey to see Jordie standing beside the crib, a guitar in his arms as he played with ease. She didn’t know he could play. How did she not know that? His eyes were closed as he softly sang “You Are My Sunshine” in what was honestly the sweetest way she had ever heard. It was so rustic, his voice blending so beautifully with the music he was making with the strums of his fingers. From where she was standing, she could see Mena Jane through the crib rails and she was just watching Jordie in awe.
Kacey was sure she matched her niece at the moment.
“He has done this for the last two nights. Mena loves it. She gets so quiet and just watches him,” Lacey whispered to Kacey, but she couldn’t tear her eyes off the sight before her. Something inside her just broke because that was supposed to be his baby he was singing to. She would have been due right around the same time as Lacey. They would have had a new little girl or boy of their own, but that wasn’t the case. Instead, they had heartbreak and rejection. Two things that ate Kacey alive daily. When her lip started to wobble, she looked down at the ground, sucking in a deep breath.
Unable to watch any longer, she turned, starting down the hall, but Lacey stopped her with a hand on her arm. “He really has changed.”
But Kacey shook her head. “No, that’s Jordie. He loves kids, he’s good with them, and he’s a damn good man. But he’ll never love me the way I love him. It isn’t in his DNA.”