“I’m coming,” he moaned again and she smiled.
But just as soon as the grin had come, it was gone as she held the toilet paper up. Something had caught her attention.
That something was bright red blood.
Panic.
That’s all Kacey felt.
Her stomach dropped. Her chest heaved and vomit rushed up her throat as she wiped again to see more bright red blood.
No. No. Fucking no!
“Jordie!” she yelled, tears spilling over her cheeks as her chest seized and she swallowed hard, not allowing the vomit to surface.
This wasn’t real.
This wasn’t happening.
There was no way.
No, this baby was supposed to make it!
“Baby, I promise, I’m coming.”
“No, Jordie, I need you now!” she yelled, and something in her voice must have told him she wasn’t playing because he was in the bathroom within seconds. When he looked at what she was holding, his eyes met hers and she could see the panic in his eyes. It mirrored hers. Silence stretched between them as he looked from the blood to her face then back, unsure of what to do, she figured.
Because she had no clue what to do either.
“I’m bleeding, Jordie,” she cried out, sucking in a breath and then letting it out slowly. “I’m not supposed to be bleeding!” She sounded like a two-year-old having the biggest meltdown known to man, but she wasn’t thinking clearly. This wasn’t fair.
Sobbing, she looked up at him for help. He had to know what to do, because she was about to lose it. She wanted this child, she wanted it so fucking badly, but she was bleeding it out. Squeezing her thighs together, she let her face fall into her hands, praying that she could keep the baby in.
It had to work.
“Okay,” he said as calmly as he could, but she knew it was taking all the will in him to stay calm. “Come on, let’s call the doctor. I’m sure it’s nothing, just a little hiccup. Come on, baby,” he said, urging her to move, but she wouldn’t budge.
“No, Jordie, I can’t move. I have to keep it in me,” she cried, and she felt his exhale of breath. It felt like defeat.
“Okay,” he whispered before he lifted her into his arms, holding her legs tightly as he carried her out of the bathroom. “I won’t let that happen.”
That did her in, and soon she was crying so hard, she couldn’t breathe.
“It’s going to be fine, let’s call the doctor,” he tried again, but she wasn’t listening. She couldn’t. Not even when she heard him on the phone did she believe him. Especially when he said they needed to get to the ER, that her doctor would meet them there. No, all she could do was hold her thighs together tightly.
Praying to God that he’d let her have this baby. That she’d never ask for anything else for the rest of her life.
Just keep my baby alive, she begged as Jordie slowly dressed her. When she watched him put a pad in her panties before sliding them up her thighs, she closed her eyes tightly, unable to understand this. As he slowly cleaned up the blood on her thighs, he was so careful and it only made her cry harder. He was trying so hard, but she could see it in his movements, his eyes, he was barely keeping it together. He was scared, but he couldn’t be as scared as she was. This was only his baby, but this was her life. Because she knew he wouldn’t stay. If she couldn’t have kids, he’d leave. No matter how much he loved her, she truly believed he’d find another reason to leave. He had always wanted kids, and his love for her, his need for her, was new. But a baby, no, that need had always been there.