CHAPTER Twenty
It was after ten at night, when Cole turned off the main highway, and down the long dirt driveway. Trees formed a canopy overhead. The place was set back from the road. He wouldn’t have to worry about the kids getting run over.
He stopped in front of a long ranch style home. There was a light burning next to the front door. Cole got off his bike, and pulled his helmet off. He looked around. He liked the fact that there were a lot of shade trees.
He walked up to the front door. There were a couple of steps up to a large covered area. Cole glanced around. There was enough room to put several chairs out here, under the roof.
He took out the keys that he’d gotten at the closing earlier this morning, and unlocked the door, and walked inside. It was a four-bedroom house. It needed some work, but there was a lot of square footage, and it had a great open floor plan. He walked past a sunken living room on the right, and headed to the kitchen that overlooked the back of the property.
There was a large window over the sink with a view of the large grassy backyard. Turning, Cole took in the large island. A breakfast area sat to the left, with French doors that led out onto a deck. He walked outside, across the deck, and down a couple steps off to the right that led to the wrap around drive and a large metal building.
The out building was larger than a four-car garage. The previous owner supposedly ran a business out of it. The place had been on the market for a long time. Cole had gotten a really good deal. Since it was a cash deal, with no financing needed, and the house had been sitting empty, the closing had happened rather quickly. Cole had been able to wrap the whole deal up in just over a week. He looked around, nodding. He thought it would work out well.
His cell phone rang, and he pulled it out, flipped it open, and put it to his ear.
“Cole?”
“Natalie? Everything okay?”
“No. It’s not.”
“What’s wrong?” His body went solid.
“It’s Angel. She was attacked.”
“What?” Cole felt his stomach drop.
“She was stabbed.” Her voice cracked. “In the parking lot of the grocery store. She’s in critical condition, Cole. They’re not sure if she’s going to make it.” Natalie broke down into sobs.
“My God.” Cole was trying to process what he’d just heard. “Are…are the kids okay?”
“Yes. Yes, they’re with me.”
“I’ll…I’ll catch the next flight out. What hospital?” He was already running back to his bike.
“Desert Samaritan. Oh, Cole. Hurry.”
“Ill call you from the airport.” He hung up.
The first flight out wasn’t until six the next morning. Luckily, it was a non-stop. He arrived in Phoenix by eight. He called Natalie’s cell as soon as he landed. She told him that Angel was still critical, but at least she had made it through the night.
Cole took a cab to the hospital.
Natalie met him at the entrance, and led him up to the ICU.
He could see Angel through the glass window from the nurse’s station. The doctor was standing there when they walked up, and Natalie explained to him who Cole was, and asked him to explain Angel’s injuries.
The doctor nodded, looking at Cole. “She has a collapsed lung. We’ve got her on a respirator. One of the stab wounds ruptured her spleen. We did emergency surgery last night to remove it, but she can live without it. There were some other injuries. Right now we’re worried about her blood pressure. Trying to get that to stabilize. If we can get her through the first 24 hours, her chances improve greatly. You can see her, but only for a few minutes.”
Cole nodded, and looked over to where she lay. He had raced across the country to be here, and now he was finding it hard to walk the last ten feet. He was scared to death.
He walked into the room, which was really more like a glass cubicle, than a room. What he saw stunned him. He barely recognized her. Her face looked swollen. There were tubes going down her throat and machines all around her.
He reached out, and covered her hand with his. “Angel, it’s Cole. You’re gonna be okay, baby. You hear me?”
The respirator made a horrible noise as it pumped life-giving oxygen into her lungs. The heart monitor blipped quietly.
She lay unresponsive. His eyes filled with tears. He couldn’t loose her. Not now. He leaned down, and kissed her forehead, and whispered, “I love you, Angel.”
He stayed with her for a few more minutes, and then turned, and walked out.
There was a police officer standing with Natalie by the entrance to the unit. Cole walked over to them. He recognized him as one of the cops that had hassled him.
“Sgt. Harmon,” Cole stated.
The officer nodded at him.
“Were you one of the officers on the scene?” Cole asked.
“No. But I talked to them. Some shoppers heard her scream. Saw her fall, and two guys run off. They stole her purse. We found it in a dumpster behind the store.”
“The doctor said she was stabbed.”
Harmon nodded. “Twice. One wound to the chest and one to the abdomen.”
“Any leads?”
“Some sketchy descriptions. We’re hoping maybe she’ll be able to tell us more.”
Cole looked back toward her bed.
Harmon leaned in, and said quietly, “Piece of advice.”
Cole looked back at Harmon.
“Leave this to us. Don’t go doing anything stupid. I know you mean something to her, and well everything she’s been through, I’d really hate to have to arrest you. Understand?”
Cole stared him down.
Harmon blew out a breath, and turned to Natalie. “Well, I just wanted to see how she was doing. Natalie, let me know if there’s any change?”
“Of course.”
Cole watched him walk away.
Natalie stepped closer. “What did he say to you, Cole?”
He shook his head in answer.
“Cole.”
“Where are the kids?”
“My friend, Bonnie, is watching them at her home.”
“Any place we can get a cup of coffee?”
She nodded, and led him down the hall to the ICU waiting room. There were vending machines against one wall.
Cole walked over to the coffee machine, and got them each a cup.
They sat.
Cole looked over at her. “You okay?”
She turned, and looked at him. “I blame myself.”
“Why?” Cole asked, stunned.
“You told us months ago that the neighborhood wasn’t safe. We should have left then.”
“Natalie, don’t. You were trying to get her out. We both were. I was coming out next week to bring her home.” If only he’d come sooner, but he’d wanted to find them a place, big enough for all of them. “I should have come back with you.”
“Oh, Cole. Don’t blame yourself.”
Cole looked away. He sat staring at the floor, barely remembering drinking the cup of coffee.
*****
Angel made it through the critical first twenty-four hours. The next hurdle, the doctor told them, was for her to get through the next week. Somehow they made it through that, too. Then an infection set in, and they fought to keep her alive. For weeks, Cole sat by her bedside, refusing to leave her side.
Eventually, she improved enough for them to remove her from the respirator, and bring her out of the induced coma they had put her in. Cole was in the room with her when she regained consciousness.
She looked at him, and smiled.
Days later, she wouldn’t remember him being there.
Finally, she improved enough to be taken off critical care, and moved to another room. The doctors thought if all went well, she may be home as soon as another week.
She woke up one day, and her thoughts were clear. She looked over, and saw Cole asleep in the chair next to her bed. She found the button to raise her bed up, and pressed it.
The sound of the bed raising woke Cole. He shook the sleep from his eyes, and looked over at her.
She was staring at him.
He smiled. “Hey, baby. How are you feeling?” he asked, moving to sit on the bed next to her.
“What are you doing here?” she asked.
“You were in an accident. I came as soon as I heard,” he whispered, brushing the hair back from her forehead.
“But you hate hospitals.”
He smiled down at her, and shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. You’re all that matters.”
She pulled away, remembering why she was mad at him. “You should go.”
He pulled back. “Angel, please don’t do this. I know you’re mad at me, but we need to talk.”
“I don’t have anything to say to you. You shouldn’t have come. I want you to leave.”
“Not before you hear what I have to say.” He knew this might be his only chance to make her listen. “I love you, Angel. I always have. I want us to be a family. I want you to come to California with me.”
She turned her head on the pillow, looking away from him. “Please go.”
He reached out to take her hand, but she yanked it away. “Angel. Please. Look at me.”
She refused.
“I love you. I know you love me, too.”
She turned to look at him then. “No. I don’t. Please go.” She pressed the call button for the nurse.
He stood up, knowing he didn’t have much time before they came, and threw him out. “Listen to me, Angel. I love you. I’m not giving up on you. I knew the minute I first saw those eyes of yours that I was in over my head. My life…I know it’s a mess. Maybe I never really tried before. Never gave a damn before. Until you. If I can’t make this work, make us work, I don’t think I could stand it. Do you hear me?”
Still she looked away.
“I feel like I’m in a deep, dark hole, and I’m tryin’ to climb out of it, babe. I’m trying to do it, for you. But I need your help, baby. And I don’t know where to start. Tell me where to start, Angel. Please. I’ll do whatever you say I need to.”
The nurse walked in.
“Please go,” Angel begged, breaking down into tears.
“You should leave, now, sir,” the nurse told him.
He looked at Angel.
Still she didn’t respond.
He turned, and walked out.
Cole returned to Natalie’s, and walked in the front door.
“Daddy, daddy!” Both TJ and Melissa ran to him, and hugged him.
He hugged them back, wondering if they were ever going to be a real family now.
Natalie came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dishtowel. She took one look at Cole’s face, and knew something was wrong. “What is it? Is everything okay?”
He went into the kitchen, and sat down. TJ and Melissa each climbed up on a knee. He looked over their heads at Natalie. “She’s awake, but she wouldn’t talk to me. Told me to leave, repeatedly.”
“Did you tell her you loved her?”
He nodded. “Yes. I said everything I could think to say to make her see that I loved her, that I wanted her.” He shook his head. She wouldn’t listen.”
“Oh, Cole. It’s just her stubborn pride, when she’s had time to heal, and she feels better, I’m sure-”
“No. I don’t think it’s going to matter. I think it’s too late for us.”
“Don’t say that.”
He looked at her, his eyes tormented. “I’m done. I don’t know what else to try.”
Natalie straightened up. “I do.” She threw the dishtowel down, and walked out of the room.
Cole stood up, with a child in each arm, and followed her down the hall.
She went into TJ’s room, and pulled a duffle bag from out of the closet. She started opening drawers, and filing the bag with clothes.
Cole set the kids down, and told them to go in Melissa’s room, and play. He kissed them on the forehead, and they ran off. Turning to Natalie, he asked, “What are you doing? Natalie, stop.”
She stopped what she was doing, and looked at him. “You’re taking the children back with you.”
“I’m what?”
“They’re going with their father for a while. At least until their mother gets out of the hospital,” she stated, as if it was already a done deal.
“What are you talking about? I can’t just take the kids away from her.” Cole stared at her like she’d lost her mind.
“Not take them away from her. Just care for them for a little while.”
“And how is that going to help anything?” This logic escaped him. Completely.
“Cole, for one thing, it would help me out. I can concentrate on getting her home, and getting her well. Secondly, when she’s well enough she’ll have to come out, and get them. Then you can have a talk…on your terms,” she explained.
Cole leaned against the doorframe, folding his arms. “You’re really going to stand there, and tell me you believe that’ll work? Are you crazy? She’ll probably call the cops on me,” Cole argued.
Natalie slammed a drawer shut. “No, she won’t. I won’t let her.”
He shook his head, not believing in this plan.
“Cole, we’ll come out to get them together. She’ll talk to you, and if after that, she still wants to come back to Arizona, then fine, I’ll help her get the kids back. But, I’m also going to make it clear to her that I’m selling the house, and I’m going back to California.”
He straightened from the doorframe, shaking his head in denial. “I told you before, I don’t want to be her only option.”
Natalie walked over to him, and took his hands in hers, and looked up at him. “Cole, trust me, please,” she pleaded softly.
He stared down at her face. A part of him believing she was grasping at straws, another part of him wanting desperately to believe her. Finally, he conceded, “I hope to hell you know what you’re doing.”
“Think you can handle being a full-time dad for a couple of weeks?”
Cole nodded solemnly, and whispered, “That’s one thing I am sure of.”
The next morning, Cole told Natalie he had an errand to run. He came back about an hour later with a big, black, shiny SUV.
Natalie saw him pull in, and asked him, when he walked in the front door, “What happened to the rental car you had? Did you swap it out for that SUV?”
“Nope. I got that for Angel and you. Here are the keys.”
“What? We don’t need a rental car,” Natalie objected, staring down at the key chain he held out. It was not the kind of key chain a rental company puts on a set of keys. It was the kind a dealership puts on.
When she hesitated to take the keys, Cole reached out, took her hand in his, and put the keys in them, closing her hand around them. “It’s not a rental. I bought it.”
“You bought it?”
“Umm hmm. Are the kids ready to go?”
Natalie was still staring down at the car keys. “What?”
“I still have to have you run me back to the dealership to pick up my rental car. I had to leave it there, when I drove this one home.”
“Cole, wait. I don’t understand. Why did you just buy a car, a brand new car? An expensive, brand new car?”
“For you and Angel. So you’d have a reliable car to drive to California. Besides she needed a new car. I wouldn’t trust that old used one she has to make it across the desert without breaking down.” Cole wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince her or himself. He didn’t want to admit that this might be a small form of bribery. At this point, he admitted he was ready to take her anyway he could get her. He was tempted to tell Natalie about the money.
A couple hours later, the kids were loaded up in his rental car, and they were ready to head out. It was after dinner, and getting dark. Cole had thought it best to try to travel as far as he could at night, while the kids slept in the backseat.
Before they left, he handed Natalie an envelope to give to Angel when she got home. She promised she would. It contained his divorce papers and a letter he’d written to her.
Natalie waved them off, crying. She knew this was for the best, but she was going to miss the children.
Natalie purposely stayed away from the hospital that day and the next. She held out until the following day, and then went to visit Angel. She walked in the hospital room, and found Angel sitting up in bed. She had just finished her lunch, the tray pushed to the side.
Natalie bent down, and hugged her. “How are you today, sweetheart?”
“I’m okay. Did you bring the kids?”
“No. I told you, you can see them when you get home.”
“You didn’t come the last two days.”
“No. I didn’t.”
“Why?”
“If you must know, I suppose I’ve been a little mad at you about the way you treated Cole.”
“Is he gone?”
“Yes. He’s gone.”
“Good.”
“Good? You should be ashamed of yourself.”
“Why?”
“Do you know he sat by your bedside day and night for weeks?”
Angel looked away. “I find that hard to believe. He hates hospitals.”
“Yes, he does. But he did it anyway, because he loves you. He dropped everything, and flew out here as soon as I called to tell him what had happened.”
Angel didn’t say anything.
“And you don’t even have the decency to hear him out.”
“I guess I’m tired of being lied to.”
“He loves you. That’s no lie. Hasn’t he proven it? Hasn’t he proven it more than once?”
Angel looked away. She knew he had. “I don’t want to talk about this now.”
Natalie studied her. “Okay. We won’t talk about this now. But believe me, we will talk about it.”
That night, when Natalie got home, Cole called her to tell her they were safely in California. He was back at his old place. The new house he’d bought still needed to be painted and furnished. Natalie asked to speak with the kids, but he explained that they were tucked in bed next to him, fast asleep. They hadn’t wanted to sleep in a separate room in the strange house.
She told him to kiss them for her, and to call her tomorrow. He had promised to show the kids the ocean tomorrow, but said they’d call as soon as they got back.
Days passed, and soon the day had finally come when Angel was to be released from the hospital. Natalie went to pick her up in the old car, leaving the shiny new one parked out on the street.
When they pulled up to the house, Angel expected the kids to run to meet her. She assumed that Natalie’s friend, Bonnie was watching them.
Natalie came around, and helped Angel out of the car. She was still a little sore, and had to take it slow. They got into the house, and Angel realized it was empty, she asked, “Where are the kids?”
Natalie knew it was time for their confrontation. “Sit down, dear.”
Angel sat down on the sofa.
Natalie sat next to her. “I have something to tell you.”
Angel looked at Natalie’s face, trying to read her expression. “What is it? Are the kids okay? You’re scaring me.”
“The kids are fine, but they’re not here.”
“Where are they?”
“They’re with their father.” Natalie waited for the explosion. It didn’t take long.
“What?”
“They’re with their father.”
“I heard you. They’re with Cole? Why? He took them? He can’t just take my children. Get me the phone. I’m calling the police.”
“No. You’re not.”
“The hell I’m not.”
“Angel. I sent them with him.”
“You what? Why?”
“Because he’s their father, and I needed some help. You were in the hospital, and I was concerned about you. And taking care of you and two little children, it was too much for me,” she lied.
“You let him take my babies? Back to California? How could you?” Angel practically shrieked. Her children were in California, seven hundred miles away. Were they okay? Was he taking care of them? Did they understand any of this? Did they understand why they’d been sent off with a father they barely knew? A million thoughts raced through her mind.
“Yes, back to California. And they’re not just your babies. They’re his, too. You’d better start remembering that, because if he ever wants to press his rights, you just might be sending them off every other weekend.”
“What? That’ll never happen.”
“Really? What makes you so sure? If you don’t stop acting so stubborn, and think about what you’re throwing away, then that is exactly where you’re going to end up.” Natalie stood up, and marched into the kitchen, and got the keys to the new SUV off the kitchen table, along with the letter Cole had written. She marched back to Angel, and held them out to her.
“What’s this?” Angel asked, taking them.
“I don’t know why you’re being so stubborn that you can’t see that you’re throwing away your happiness with both hands. That man loves you, with all his heart. He’d do anything to make you and those kids happy. Why can’t you see that?”
Angel looked at her.
Natalie nodded to the keys in Angel’s hands. “He bought that for you, so you could drive it to California.”
“What?”
“Yes. A brand new SUV. Top of the line. It’s worth quite a lot of money, but I’m sure you know that.”
“Why would he do that?”
“My God. Because he loves you!”
Angel just stared at her.
“You might as well know everything. My friend in Seattle? She wasn’t sick. I didn’t fly to Seattle. I flew out to see Cole.”
“What? Why?”
“To see how he lived. What he had to offer you and the kids.”
“How he lived? You mean that room in the clubhouse?”
“Yes, I saw the clubhouse. Does that surprise you? But he also showed me the home he lives in. It’s lovely. A little small, but I’m sure that can be worked out. He’d do anything to make you happy, I’m sure.”
“I’m going to my room.” Angel started to stand up. She didn’t want to hear any of this. But what Natalie said next stopped her.
“Read the letter he wrote you. When you’re completely healed, and up to the trip, we can leave for California. I’ll take you out there, but you will talk to him. If after that, you still want to return to Arizona, I’ll help you get back. But Angel, I’m selling this house. And I’m going back to California.”
Angel’s mouth dropped open.
“I’ll see you in the morning.” And with that, Natalie left her, and headed to bed.
Angel sat staring at the envelope and keys sitting in her lap. She was trying to digest all the information that Natalie had just thrown at her. Natalie was mad at her. That much was clear.
Was she being unfair to Cole? He had hurt her so badly. He had slept with her, knowing he was married. Like she was some, what? Side-action? A diversion from his marriage? She had felt so hurt and humiliated. She had thought they were starting to build something. That after all these years of being separated, that maybe they had a chance, a real chance. But he had known all along that he had a wife waiting for him, that he was going back to California. He’d never had any intentions of staying here with Angel.
And then when his wife had called her, well, that had been the ultimate humiliation. When Mandy had told Angel that she and Cole were having a baby, something inside Angel shattered.
Natalie had told her months later that Cole had found out that Mandy had lied about the baby. Cole had called her everyday for weeks. She’d refused to take the calls, or open his letters. She, instead, had wrapped her anger around her like a cloak. A cloak she wore proudly.
And then the calls had stopped. She hadn’t known until they did, that she could feel worse than she already had. But thinking that he’d truly given up, that she really would never see him again? She’d sunk into a deep depression.
Natalie had informed her that Cole had flown to her side the minute he’d heard she was attacked. That he’d stayed by her bedside night and day, refusing to leave her side. And then he’d stood there, in that hospital room, and told her he loved her, wanted a life with her, promised to do whatever she demanded to make this work. He’d practically begged her to forgive him, to give him another chance. But her pride wouldn’t let her do anything but throw it all back in his face. She didn’t know what to say to him, and all she could do was turn her head away, and order him to leave.
He’d always said he didn’t deserve her. Now Angel questioned whether it was her that actually didn’t deserve him.
She looked down at the envelope lying in her hands. Now, as she ran her shaking fingers over it, she was afraid that what was really inside was a goodbye letter, telling her he’d finally accepted that she didn’t want him. Dear God, what had she done?
She opened the thick envelope, and took out the contents. There was a single sheet of folded paper and a thick folded document with many pages, stapled together. She opened the document first. It was Cole’s divorce decree. His final papers, just like he’d promised her. He hadn’t lied about getting a divorce.
Laying them aside, she opened the single folded paper. It was handwritten. Her hand shook as she held it.
Angel,
I know I have little reason to hope that you will ever change your mind, and give me another chance. I understand why you feel you can’t. I know I hurt you. For that, I’m sorry. I want you to know I never meant to cause you such pain.
I understand why you believe we could never have a life together. I never lied to you, but I didn’t tell you the truth, either, which I guess is the same as lying. You think you can’t trust me, and I understand why you feel that way.
I want a life with you and my children. I want us to be a family, but I think you’ve finally convinced me that will never happen.
I want only good things for you, baby. I hope you at least know that.
I love you. I always have.
Cole
A tear rolled down Angel’s face, and then she broke into sobs.