What the fuck am I doing? Here she is, in my room with her body pressed against mine. She’s centimeters from my lips. I just have to lean forward and we’ll be connected. I could taste her sweet, sinful mouth. Her tongue could be moving against mine as I palm her ass, pulling her onto my hard-on. But no, my dumbass asks her to be sure, because I won’t be able to take it if she’s not. I won’t be able to work day in and day out with her knowing that I had her and allowed her to reject me.
My hands beg for contact. They want to touch her just as much as I do. The other night in the greenroom was just an iota of what I want to do to her. I’ve never had to be patient to get a woman, and tonight’s a testament of just that. I could’ve brought that groupie back here - she knew who I was - but the moment I stepped out into the hall and she tried to kiss me, I didn’t want to take it any further.
Katelyn stares up at me, her brown eyes penetrating my resolve. She licks her lips, enticing me more. I want nothing more than to drag my hands down her body, over her luscious hips. I can cup my hands behind her legs, pick her up and she’d be sitting right where I need to feel her. Her flimsy dress isn’t enough of a barrier; she’d feel exactly how much I want her.
I study her for a sign, anything to let me know that she wants me. That this is what she wants for us. My movements are slow and calculated. I stick with what I know I’m allowed to do. Her eyes watch as my hand moves to her hair. I pick up a curled strand and hold the silk in between my fingers before pinning it behind her ear. I allow my fingers to touch her, allow them to move along her jaw. Her skin is soft, and it pebbles lightly as I move closer to her mouth. I lift her chin gently and lean in, brushing my lips lightly across hers. She doesn’t resist me.
She gasps, and I pull back. Her eyes lock on mine. I look from her eyes to her mouth, her tongue teasing me as it wets her lips again. My lips touch hers as I give her small sensual kisses. Her hand grabs my side and I feel her pull me closer. My hand finds purchase at the back of her neck, holding her to me as I deepen the kiss. The explosion of heat that I feel when her tongue touches mine is hypnotic. Our lips move on their own volition.
Katelyn steps closer, her hand moving up my chest. I sigh when she touches my face. She holds me to her, like I belong. I’ve been waiting for this moment since I met her and now that I finally have her, I don’t think I’ll be able to let go.
“Katelyn,” I say huskily in between kisses. She pulls back abruptly, breaking our contact. I’m afraid to open my eyes. I rise up and take a deep breath. When I open my eyes she’s looking anywhere but at me. I reach for her, only for her to recoil at my touch. I drop my head and hand and step back from her. My throat is tight. I want to ask her why, but can’t find the words. I’m afraid to open my mouth.
“This is a mistake,” she says.
“It isn’t.” The words are for my benefit because I doubt she’s going to believe me. She’s not ready. I should’ve known this. I look at her and find that she’s shaking her head. Her fingers pull at her lips. Lips that I just kissed full on and want to kiss again. No, that’s not right. I need to kiss them again. I need to feel the spell she puts me under just to feel alive.
“I need to go.”
“Don’t.”
Katelyn shakes her head. She bends and picks up her shoes that I didn’t even realize she had dropped. I stand here, rooted in place while she walks to my door. What are the chances that she opens it and turns back to me? Probably slim. She doesn’t want me. I’m nothing but a distraction. I’m not the man she thinks she needs to help raise her kids. I don’t fit the mold, the stereotype of the All-American husband.
My heart stops when the door opens. I’m powerless to keep her here, to stop her from walking away from something I know can be good. I know how to treat a woman like her. She’s the one I’ve been waiting for.
“Why her?”
I walk to her, stopping when my chest is pressed against her back. I hold onto the edge of the door, giving me more leverage to keep her tightly against me.
“What do you mean?”
Katelyn turns, her hand brushing against me. I bite my lip to avoid hissing. That will scare her, but she has to realize what it does to a man when you brush against them when they’re hard, and when I’m near her… hell even when I’m not near her, I’m hard. Just the simple thought of seeing her smile once a day is enough for me.
“She got to touch you, take your hood off and when I tried, you moved away.”
She was watching. This should give me hope, but it doesn’t. It hurts that she saw me with that woman. If this was last year, I would’ve bedded her and never thought about her again. That all changed the night I met Katelyn. One look at her and I knew.