“No.” Baodan stood and took an angry step in Eoghanan’s direction. “I know that I wasna fair to ye after she died, and I canna apologize to ye enough. I know that ’twas no yer fault, but I willna allow ye to speak such lies against her.”
Eoghanan glanced at me sideways, and my heart squeezed uncomfortably at the hurt I knew Eoghanan felt at his brother’s lingering mistrust. I stepped out of the shadows and pointed at the table where the journal lay. “Baodan, don’t. He has no reason to lie to you. It’s right there.”
He turned and looked down at the closed book, raising his hands in frustration. “What’s this?”
“It’s hers,” I said softly. I didn’t want him to read it, but I knew he would not believe it otherwise.
“No. She dinna know how to write, nor read.”
“Aye, she did, Baodan. I taught her meself.”
Baodan’s clenched fists showed the only sign that he heard Eoghanan’s words. Hesitantly he flipped open the worn cover. Every bit of me wished I could prevent the pain coming to him.
*
Much time passed, and I couldn’t breathe with the anticipation of his reaction.
When he spoke, anguish filled his cracked voice. “’Twas Niall. He killed her, dinna he?”
Red eyes brimming with unshed tears faced us as Baodan turned from his seat. I wanted to run to him and throw my arms around him, but I couldn’t bring myself to do so. This pain stemmed from a time before me, and he didn’t want me near him in this instant.
“Aye, but ’twas only after Mother fell that I learned the truth meself.” Eoghanan took one step toward his brother but stopped as Baodan held up his hand. He wished distance from us both.
“Ah, ’tis why ye sent her away?”
“Aye.”
Baodan stood, his eyes moving back and forth between me and Eoghanan. The pain etched on his face hurt me to my core.
“Thank ye for telling me. If ye will excuse me, I should like to be alone.”
“I’m afraid ye doona have time for that, sir. The entire Conall clan along with yer mother has just arrived at yer door.” All of our heads turned in unison to see the hurried maid scurry back down the stairwell.
Baodan nodded and stepped toward the doorway. “’Tis good that they have come. We shall need them. Rally the keep and make ready for trouble. It comes.”
“Ye stay as long as ye need, Baodan. I’ll go and see all is done.” Eoghanan assured him as he waved him back.
I stood still until Eoghanan retreated, but I could refrain myself no longer, whether he wanted it or not. I needed to touch Baodan. “I know you want to be alone and I’ll leave you in just a moment, but I…I need you to know that I’m here.”
One lone tear spilled out of his eyes, and I reached my thumb up to brush it away. He grabbed my hand and held my palm against his face, not trying to hide the pain. It meant more to me than he realized.
“I’m verra glad for it, lass, for I feel quite out of sorts with the world.”
“That’s okay, you don’t always have to be so strong.”
He placed his own palm against my face and pulled me close, stroking my hair with his fingers. “Aye, today I do, lass, but there is none that gives me strength the way that ye do.”
Chapter 34
No longer within Niall’s reach, Kenna would no longer keep her silence. Otherwise, I could see no reason for her to bring all of the Conalls with her on her return home. Yet Baodan seemed glad that she brought so many. She knew the support of many clans would be needed to end Niall.
Walking hand-in-hand, Baodan and I made our way down to the castle entrance. I grew more nervous with each step. For if the clans gathered, it meant battle approached.
“I wish I’d used a knife on him instead of my hands,” I said.
“What did ye say?”
“Oh.” I hadn’t realized I’d even uttered the thought out loud. “Um…I said, I wished I’d used a knife on him that night. Then he’d already be dead.”
“Ach, lass.” Baodan continued moving but looked down at me in shock. “I am verra glad ye did no such thing. If ye had succeeded, ye wouldna be able to deal with the killing of a man. Ye are too soft-hearted.”
“Pssh.” The sound escaped as I rolled my eyes. I’d love the opportunity to knife the sick asshole.
“Oh, me God. She’s alive.” Baodan pulled away from me and ran across the main entryway, scooping up a woman I assumed to be his aunt into his arms.
I stayed back, allowing them a moment, smiling in relief that she eluded Niall’s grasp.
I heard her approaching before I saw her. The quick, hurried step and fast voice a sure sign that Adelle came my way. I looked to my left to see all of my favorite girls approaching, accompanied by a shockingly attractive older gentlemen who had to be Adelle’s husband.
“Oh. My. Gosh.” I mouthed the words, emitting no sound as she passed, grinning like a schoolgirl. I turned my head to follow her and held up my hands in question.