I scrolled up to previous messages. None screamed Zoey had fucked him, but I still felt my anger building. I became aware of my harsh breathing through my flared nostrils, and a wave of heat flushed through my tensed body. Why would this little fucker still be pursuing a woman who’d just had a baby? My woman! I knew I didn’t like the prick, but this was the moment I began to hate his soft ass.
I had to calm down. I felt I had every reason to and none to be insecure about. I had Zoey where I wanted her. She’d just given birth to my child. That made me the permanent fixture I’d desperately wanted to be. I couldn’t get hung up on the fact that the Bernard kid was after her ass. I’d laid claim to it when we conceived the life that was now lying in her arms, feeding from her. I had my child.
I officially have my Zoey.
“Who was it?” Zoey paid me a fleeting glance and returned it back to the man of the hour, not wanting to lose a moment of this milestone.
I quickly tapped away, deleting that message from Bernard the Queen of the Golden Arches.
“Your mom, checking in,” I tossed back at her.
“Oh, she’s going to be upset that she missed this.” Zoey couldn’t hide her excitement.
And I had to get back in the ring to regain mine.
Fuck a Bernard! Fuck kinda name is that anyway?
I placed the phone back on the side table and stood over the bed to watch the festivities. Out of nowhere, I felt a caressing swipe of my cheek. I looked down to see Zoey beaming up at me. Never before had I experienced joy and disappoint in the same event.
I’d have to get used to this. My Ni?a wasn’t ready.
Chapter 13
Then
April 2008
~Zoey~
We were discharged from the hospital two days after I delivered Jordan. Apparently, Stenton and my mother agreed that for the first week, while Stenton was relieved of playing, we’d stay at his home in Alpine. It was big enough to accommodate my mother, who would be staying with me. Stenton wanted full access to his son and didn’t feel comfortable staying at my parents’ where there was no room for him anyway. In Alpine, he could still train while helping out with Jordan.
Things were weird between Stenton and me because we assumed different roles. We were now parenting partners, no longer lovers…or best friends. His good energy was with me, but he seemed more formal and timid. Nonetheless his exuberance around Jordan melted everyone’s heart. He stayed in the baby’s face, constantly talking about nothing at all.
Two weeks after I had Jordan, I moved into the Philly apartment. I figured the way to go in was head first. I needed stability for my son and that wouldn’t happen in good time if we’d stayed with my mother for a few months. I made my bed and had to sleep in it, so to speak.
It was hard because my mother was still working and couldn’t stay with us very long. She was killing herself, trying to prepare meals for two households, helping with Jordan and going to work every morning. So many nights I had to kick her out, which was the last thing I wanted. I needed my mom more than ever. She would assign Ruth responsibilities, but at seventeen and with no driver’s license, she had to be transported and would keep the same hours as my mother when she visited.
The upside to the isolation was the bonding that took place between Jordan and me. He was the most beautiful baby I’d ever seen. It amazed me how I could soothe his cries with just a diaper change, burp, feeding from my breasts or simple cuddling. I never imagined what I’d be like as a mother; it had all come so soon, but Jordan forced me into this realm of love I never knew existed. And while I thought I loved and appreciated Sarah Barrett before this experience, I could now honor her with a fresh perspective. I’d been a mom for two short weeks and could see what the fuss was all about every year, leading up to the second Sunday of May.