Killing Me Softly(A Broken Souls Series)

The foyer is wide, giving you the chance to admire the beautiful imported white marble floors. The staircase is wide at the bottom, but narrows as you reach the top of the stairs. The entrance screams money but in a classy, not over-the-top way. We turn left into the living room. It feels strange being in this room, it was always off limits. The oversized couches are pure white and filled with feathers. Everything in the room is white, from the carpets, the couches, the curtains and most of the pillows. The room is accented in navy blue and brushed nickel fixtures.

“I’m so glad you stopped by. I’ve missed you and Andy. Without her, the house is too quiet. Never mind those depressing thoughts, how are you doing? Is school working out for you?”

I settle into the loveseat hoping I don’t look all hunched over by sitting on the edge. “Yeah, it’s working out. I’m carrying a B in my English and math courses and an A in Economics. It is harder than I expected, school was always easy for me. Finals are next week.”

“You’ve always been good in school, I’m proud of you. Listen, I wanted to have you over for a couple of reasons. One of course is Andy’s clothes. We want you to have everything, her shoes, and jewelry, whatever you want. Don’t worry about me, I’ve taken out the things that I’d like to keep. Like her class ring and the diamond earrings we got her for her sixteenth birthday. There’s another pair of diamond studs, I want you to have them.”

Andy loved her diamonds. She would sit and design the engagement ring she would have one day and swore that if he couldn’t afford it, he wasn’t the guy for her. We’ll never know. “Thank you, that’s so generous. Are you sure you want to part with her things?”

“Yes dear, we know that you’ll put them all to good use. I know, I saw how you girls changed clothes every ten minutes. I have something else I’d like for you to have.” Linda stands up and crosses over to a small table in the corner of the room. She picks up an envelope and hands it to me. “Open it.”

The envelope hasn’t been sealed, just the flap tucked inside. I pull out a cashiers check in the amount of one-hundred thousand dollars made out to me. My heart falls into my stomach. Holy mother of fried chicken! Words escape me, I can’t find anything audible to say.

“Honey that is part of Andy’s college fund. We would like you to have it for college. I remember hearing you say you want to go on to the University of Oklahoma, this will cover your tuition and books.”

Tears, real tears, are falling from my eyes with no control from me. “This is too generous. Put it in your retirement fund.”

“Holland, we have plenty of money for our retirement, this is for you. It would have paid for Andy’s classes. We know you’ll be able to put it to good use and I can’t imagine anyone else more deserving. You were there for Andy during break-ups, for every dance recital, for all the ups and downs, you never turned your back to her. That is the best type of friendship. You deserve everything life has to offer, and I want to make it happen for you. Please, we want this for you.”

Without thinking, I jump up and take her hand, pulling her up to me and I hug her. “Thank you so much,” I whisper barely audible. “You have no idea how happy I am right now. I miss her so much, I…I…I just miss her.” The deep hidden mourning in my heart has found its way to the surface. I cry from happiness and sadness at the same time.

We stood there hugging, both in tears until they no longer were falling.

“I’m sorry to get so emotional, I had a dream about her last night and it has rocked me a little. Thank you, I’ll take it to the bank tomorrow. I promise to use it for school.”

“Let’s go up to her room, I want to hear all about your dream. I love having dreams of her, the hard part is waking up and realizing she’s still gone.” She heads towards the stairs and I follow her up to Andy’s bedroom.

It has been almost eight months since I’ve been in Andy’s room. Eight months since I’ve heard her laugh, or scream, or tell dumb jokes. Eight months since I’ve had to kill a spider for her, or eaten large amounts of bacon. Eight months since I was whole.

The room smells like her. She loved bold perfumes that lasted for hours on end. Her favorite was Glamorous, and her room smells just like it. Her bedroom is over the top old Hollywood style. A large crystal chandelier hangs in the center of the room. Her purple velvet curtains that start close to the ceiling and puddle on the floor are pulled open. The view of their landscaped backyard and salt water pool is amazing. I’ve never seen a bedroom with a giant window that went across the entire wall. When they remodeled the house a few years ago, they had the window installed. Whatever Andy wanted, she got. She wanted a glass wall to look out to the stars at night.

I sit down at her white writer’s desk that she used as a vanity table. She had at least fifty bottles of perfume in perfect rows along the backside of the table. Slowly, I pick up each bottle and smell them. Each of them would evoke a memory of some sort. The blue bottle is the perfume she wore to our junior prom. We went with a couple of other girls from school. The whole limousine smelled like a perfume factory by the time we got to prom. The pink bottle with the glass rose stopper is the one she would wear on her dates. Guys seemed to really like her perfume.

“I like the green bottle. It makes me think of her dance recital last year,” Linda said. “Take the perfumes, you’ll get more use out of them than I will. There’s empty plastic bins in the closet for you to use.”

“Thank you.” I go over to the closet and pick up one of the smaller bins. It feels strange shopping through someone else’s stuff. A bag full of brand new Bath and Body Works lotions and shower gel reminds me of the huge sale we went to just a week before the accident. She was obsessed with that store. “Do you want these?” I ask.

“No, I’m serious, everything in here is yours. I’ve boxed up all the clothes, it might take you a trip or two with your car to pick them up. I labeled them though, so you can take all the summer and fall stuff now. Just take her jewelry box, it was a gift to her from a family friend.”

As I go through her things and pack them up, I tell her about my dreams. She’s had a lot of dreams too. It was nice talking to someone who knew her like I did. Andy wasn’t perfect, but she was as close as you can get. Of course she acted spoiled every once in a while, it only took a gentle reminder that she was being a bitch and she’d stop.

Linda and I laughed at the pictures of us that are on her bulletin board. I have copies of most of those pictures so I insisted she keep them.

“Holland, you’re a part of my family. If you need anything, and I mean anything, please ask. We would love to have you over for dinner. Maybe when you and Tate date a little longer, you can have him over with you. I know how tough things are with your dad. Are you still boycotting boys from meeting your dad?”

“Are you kidding? I can’t imagine any guy meeting my father. Especially someone like Tate. My dad will freak out when he finds out that he’s in the Air Force.” I laugh it off and shake my head back and forth. “You know he hates military guys.”

She draws in a deep breath before answering. “Oh I remember you telling me about his military fixation. Bring him here, we’ll be your fill in parents. I love you like a daughter.”