I Love You to Death

I breathe out a "Yes," before I’m consumed by his kisses again.

I can’t believe I’ve gone without this for so long. I can’t believe I ever thought I could go without this. I feel so hungry for him, as though I’ve been starving for months and months, and now I’m finally being allowed to eat. I have no idea what time it is. Don’t know if Jared is here or what he will say when he sees us. I’m pretty sure deep down, I don’t actually care, because for the first time in a really long time, I feel truly, unbelievably happy right now.

"I think I might need a shower," I eventually say to Luke.

He smiles at me as he says, "Yeah me too."

And I just can’t help myself as I say, "Do you wanna join me?"

He wraps his arms tighter around me and pulls me on top of him. Pressing hungry kisses all over my face, he almost growls his response. "Hell yes."

Despite what we’ve just spent all night and all morning doing, the shower doesn’t stop us from doing it all over again. The warm soapy water on his skin is almost too much, and I just can’t stop touching him, can’t stop my body’s response to him. It feels completely foreign and new, this reaction I’m having to Luke, but I don’t care, because I only want more of it. And of course, the shower is definitely offering me a perfect view of what’s now all mine to enjoy for the rest of the day. He is, without a doubt, gorgeous. I can really see that now. He has a long, lean body that’s toned from countless nights of throwing himself around stage with a guitar. His tattoos are a sharp contrast in black on his pale skin and I can’t stop running my fingers over them. His dark blue eyes watch me the whole time and his lips and fingers are constantly touching me. It’s incredibly intimate and an unbelievable turn-on being with him like this.

When we finally get out and are towelling dry, Luke asks, "Coffee?"

I smile at him again, as I answer, "Yes," and laugh when he wraps an arm around my naked body and pulls me in for another kiss.

It feels like he can’t get enough of me either and I like it, I really like it.

I towel dry my hair, watching Luke in the mirror as he pulls on a pair of sweats and heads shirtless out to the kitchen. Focusing on my own reflection, I’m stunned when I barely recognise the face looking back at me.

I look so different today.

I can see there’s a smile tugging at my mouth and I wonder if it’s been there since I woke up this morning or maybe if it’s been there all night. It’s been so long since I’ve seen myself smiling. So long since I’ve had anything to smile about, and it’s a shock to see it. Leaning in closer, I run my fingertips over my lips, which are red and slightly swollen. This makes me smile even more, as I remember the thousands of kisses Luke has pressed to them since last night. Up close like this, I see something else too, something that scares me a little. Light in my eyes. I wonder when that happened, because for as long as I can remember, nothing but dull brown eyes have looked back at me. Dull eyes, that just looked permanently sad. But now they are alive and flecked with gold, as they shine back at me from the mirror. Seeing this new me sends a shiver through my body, a shiver at what it could all possibly mean.

Turning, I walk back out and into Luke’s room. I pick up my clothes, but right now, I don’t want to put them back on. Walking over to some drawers, I wonder if Luke would mind if I wore something of his. I pull out a pair of his boxer briefs and a black t-shirt. Pulling on his clothes, I peek out the door and see Luke standing in the kitchen, hands on the counter as he gazes out the window, his back to me. I can’t see any sign of Jared and I also can’t resist the bare skin that feels like it’s pulling me towards him. I walk silently out into the kitchen and slide my arms around his waist as I rest my cheek against his back, between his shoulder blades. I hear his soft groan and I can’t help kissing his smooth, warm skin.

"I borrowed something to wear, I hope you don’t mind?" I murmur into his back.

Luke turns in my arms and when I look up, I find him smiling as he slides his hands around my waist and under the t-shirt I’m wearing. Sparks of fire flash through me at the look he gives me, at his fingers dancing over my skin.

"Definitely not, this is a very good look on you," he says in a low voice.

"It is?" I ask, quickly glancing down at myself.

Luke smiles again before he leans down to whisper, "Are you kidding me? You, in my clothes, after a fantastic night and morning like the one we just had? Yeah, it doesn’t get any better than that Ash."

I feel my stomach drop to the floor, my teeth uncontrollably grazing his collar bone in response to his words. God I feel so turned on again, how does he keep doing this to me? I pull back to look at him. "It was pretty fantastic, wasn’t it?" I say quietly.

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