“Still freaking out?” His shoulders sink slightly as he tucks his hands in his pockets.
“No.” I’m firm in my answer as I turn to him. “I’m not.”
He licks his bottom lip, raising his eyes to look back up at me. “Was it okay?”
“You know it was.” I place a hand on his shoulder, not liking the uncertainty I seem to cause in him. “It was fucking incredible. Beyond.” I shake my head, still amazed as I look past him toward the lake. “I didn’t know anything could feel that good.”
“Yeah.” He sounds just as fascinated. “I didn’t either.”
I push him away playfully, and he laughs before shoving me back. “So, don’t question it. I want it. I loved it. And I want to do it again.” I swat his ass carefully. “After I give that ass a rest, that is.”
We laugh and joke, wandering through the secluded woods surrounding the cabin until we go back and grill the steaks he packed in a cooler. After dinner, we fall back into bed, but I don’t fuck him.
After grinding against each other, naked, until we come, we lay there, still covered in our mutual release. I try not to let my mind wander to what’s going to happen at the end of the summer.
Of how we can keep this from everyone. Knowing them, my family probably already knows. But his? His dad will hate him for something so simple as who he’s attracted to. It could ruin his life—this insane pull we have toward each other.
“Is it worth it?” I ask so quietly, it’s barely audible.
He rolls to his side, and my eyes home in on the heavily muscled bicep propping his head up. “Is what worth it?”
I roll to my side, too, so I can face him. The moonlight shining into the room allows me to take in his sharp features with ease. “Hiding a piece of yourself to get your grandfather’s company.”
He’s pensive, thinking it over carefully before he swallows, his throat dancing with the movement. “Yeah. I think so. It was his dream for me, you know?”
“But would he want it this way?”
His features darken, and I know he’s as troubled as I am about it. “It won’t be so bad. I mean . . .” he sighs, “it’s not like I can’t still be me.”
“But you have to hide it.”
He looks pained, not concealing his thoughts from me as he gives a clipped nod. “Yeah. I do.”
I lean forward and steal his lips, not wanting to twist the knife even further. I know it’s not how he wants to live his life, but I also know it’s important to him to be able to take back his grandfather’s company.
“What about you?”
“What about me?” I pull back and rest my head on the pillow.
“You always going to hide?”
I swallow hard at him calling me out, but I’m not angry about it. “I’m not hiding. I just . . . I don’t have answers, you know?”
He shrugs, scooting closer to me, his head on my pillow now. “I think you have some.”
“Do I?” I quirk an eyebrow. “And what exactly would I say to the people in my life I care about? I’m ‘friends who fuck’ with Grayson?”
He laughs at that, his mouth opening as his head falls back slightly. “From the sound of it, your family would be totally fine with that explanation.”
I smile. “Yeah, they would be. Probably too okay with it. I’m sure Blair would pepper me with totally inappropriate questions.”
He smiles and moves so close, his nose brushes against mine. “I want to meet her someday.”
The someday is there because that really isn’t in our near future—the meeting the parents and the out-there dating thing—and we both know it. “Yeah, she’d love you.”
He smiles softly, and our eyes close as we lie there, our legs intertwining while I try like hell to fight my heart getting just as wrapped up as my legs.
But I think I might have already failed at that.
TWENTY-EIGHT
“You don’t have to do this.” I look down at Rhett’s naked body as he kneels, the water pouring down over us both. It’s a small shower, but we squeezed in to fit inside.
“Shut. Up,” he growls as he holds my hard cock with one hand and licks the tip, moaning as he tastes me for the first time.
I lean my head back, overwhelmed by the sensation of him taking more of me into his mouth. “Holy shit.”
I swear I feel the fucker smile around my dick. He takes more into his mouth, teasing me with his tongue, already good at this. Of course, he is. I don’t think Rhett can fail at anything, despite what he thinks.
I gave him a blowjob, wanting to have a little fun in the shower this morning, but I never expected him to drop to his knees and reciprocate. I would have been totally fine grinding against him until we both got dirty all over again, but he surprised me like he always does.
We had sex again last night after Rhett finally decided enough time had passed for me to be ready. It was even better than the first time, and my ass is still tender from him taking it with the passion I’ve come to expect from him.
I run my fingers through his wet hair as he goes to town on my dick, making my knees weak. I’m already close, but when he reaches his hand between my cheeks, pressing his finger against my hole, my cock jerks, and I tug on his hair. “Rhett. I’m close. I’m going to . . .” He sucks on my cock with vigor, and I lose it. “Oh god.” I come with a long drawn out moan, unleashing in his mouth. He swallows, licking my shaft clean before he stands up, his green eyes gleaming.
“Holy. Shit.”
He leans in, his strong hand gripping the back of my neck and pulling me in for a dirty kiss where I taste myself on his tongue. I suck on it, making a groan rumble through him and into my mouth.
He shoves me back playfully with a grin on his lips before he walks directly under the spray of water and washes himself free of soap. “I can’t believe we have to leave today.”
I don’t want to.
I don’t say the words though. Our three days are up, and tomorrow we go back to school. But no part of me wants to leave the sanctuary we’ve found here in this cabin. It was a brief trip, but we spent the whole time wrapped up in each other. Going for walks, talking a little—although never digging too deep—grilling, and making each other come.
It’s been everything I never thought it could be. And now, it’s over.
Back to school around my friends, where I have to keep it quiet. Back to his friends, who are suspicious, but don’t outright say it. Back to my parents if they ever bother coming home. Back to life.
“Yeah.” He moves out of the spray, and I step under the showerhead, rinsing off before we both climb out, drying off.
“Maybe we can come back here this summer?”
I look over my shoulder at Rhett as he ties a towel around his lean waist. “You’d want that?”
His smile is shy, like maybe he said something he shouldn’t have as I turn to face him, wrapping my towel around my waist. “Yeah. Maybe.”
I walk closer to him, letting my hand fall to his hip and pulling him into me. “I’d like that.”
His mouth quirks up on the right side. “Okay. Maybe we can go for an actual swim.”
“Only if you don’t wuss out on me again.”
He shoves my shoulder, and we laugh, heading up to the loft—where we’ve both been staying this trip—and get dressed. When he pulls on his jeans and tee, he sits on the edge, running his fingers through his damp hair. “You’re okay with everything that happened?”
I fight a smile because I know he’s deadly serious, and I don’t want him to retreat back into that head of his. “Yes. And I want to continue it.”
He frowns. “But only in secret. Right?”
I pull my t-shirt over my head and button my jeans before sitting down next to him. “Is that a problem?”
I feel sick asking the question. I know he seemed on-board with not telling anyone about us at first, but maybe now that we’ve had sex, he’s having second thoughts. And why not? His family wouldn’t care that he’s involved with a guy.
We both know the problem here is with me. And my fucked-up family.
His hand moves to the back of his neck, and I watch his fingers grip it tightly. “No. It’s okay.”
“Are you sure?” I search his eyes, hoping he’s really okay with it. I don’t want to hurt him, but I can’t let my dad find out. I have no idea what he’d do, but I know it wouldn’t be good.
“I’m sure.” He drops his hand and turns to face me with a look of determination. “It’s okay. I just hate lying to my friends.”
I know he’s talking about Bree and Fletcher. I also know how close he is to them. “You don’t have to.”
He cocks his head to the side with a raised brow. “I just told you it’s okay. That I’ll do it.”