Hold On

I closed my eyes.

Ethan had a room at Merry’s and it was definitely his room. Not a junk room. Nothing was in the closet but some of my kid’s clothes. Shampoo, toothpaste, toothbrush in the crappy bathroom Ethan used that Merry was going to gut after Christmas and redo.

The roof, furnace, AC, and windows had been first, obviously, and Merry hadn’t fucked around with those. He had us there and he had that frequently, he’d told me, so he took care of that right away. Right away, as in, he had work scheduled to start practically the day after he moved in.

I had clothes in Merry’s closet and doubles of all my stuff (except makeup—that required an investment, but I had bits and bobs, so I was getting there) in his crappy master bath.

We were all but moved in.

And now—Merry’s house being so big, the great room a place where we could all be together, Ethan liking showing off its awesomeness to his buds so sleepovers continued to be frequent (they just happened at Merry’s), and Merry pretty much taking over the care of my kid when I was at work nights or evenings—we were mostly here.

We might sleep at my place once or twice a week.

But Merry’s place was becoming home.

This was intentional. He gave both of us sets of keys the day he’d closed on the house. The first night we stayed over, which was the first night he was in the house since we’d helped him move, we found he’d bought an Xbox so Ethan would have all he needed to feel at home. And he told me to pack us both and make it so we weren’t lugging bags back and forth all the time.

“Settle in, baby. You and Ethan,” he’d whispered to me in the dark that first night in his house. “I think we’re all past the idea of sleepovers.”

I was. Definitely.

My kid would go to the ends of the earth for Merry, so I figured he was too.

I just didn’t know Merry was at that place.

But I was glad to know.

And the next day, I settled us in.

Right then, however, I knew just what place Merry actually was in.

And it was even better.

I turned in his arm at the sink, looking up at him.

“You want Christmas,” I whispered my guess.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Didn’t wanna say anything, but since Ethan mentioned it and seems he’s good with it, there it is.”

“Then we’ll have Christmas here. I’ll talk to Mom.”

He smiled down at me and I saw excitement in his face that made my badass Merry into my badass Merry who could be cute.

“Thanks, baby,” he murmured, bent in and touched his mouth to mine. When he lifted up, he said, “Since you’re off today, I’ll go get a tree and we’ll decorate it tonight. You got time to go out and get some ornaments? Lights? Whatever else we need?”

Did I have time for Christmas decoration shopping during Christmas shopping season, when the population at large should be at its best but was undoubtedly at its worst, doing this for a tree for Garrett Merrick’s awesome new lake house?

I totally had time.

“I have time,” I confirmed.

He looked like he was fighting laughter, which was telling me I wasn’t hiding my enthusiasm for that day’s chores, when he said, “Cheap shit, babe. Just to get us by. I have a feeling next year I’m gonna have more Christmas crap than anyone needs by a long shot.”

My exciting new plans for the day flew straight from my head.

“What?” I asked.

Merry didn’t repeat his feelings about what would happen in the next year, which, my guess, included Ethan’s and my Christmas stuff being at his awesome new lake house.

Instead, he got bossy.

“Go to Bobbie’s. Ask Vi if you can use her discount. Get those plastic tubes of ornaments, the ones that are twelve for a buck. Get a couple. And some lights. But don’t mess around with the lights, babe. You should always invest in good lights. Next year, we’ll find a way to use the extras.”

I blinked, what Merry said earlier going straight from my head.