Hold On

I gave him more, writhing on his dining room table as he toyed with me.

“Need you, Merry,” I gasped. “And wanna hold on when you fuck me.”

He looked from his hand between my legs into my eyes.

“You gonna give me what I need?”

I stared into his eyes and whispered, “Always.”

On a groan, his mouth took mine as his hand slid away.

That was when I moaned in disappointment against his tongue.

But I felt him working between my legs and then I lost his mouth when my neck arched, my head turning to the side, as he drove in and filled me.

“Arms around me, brown eyes,” he grunted, plunging hard and fast.

I wrapped my arms around him and lifted my knees high.

He pounded in deeper.

“Fuck yeah,” I breathed.

Merry’s fingers curled around the back of my knee, sliding down to my ankle. He swung it in at his back and kept it there.

His other arm braced under me, he lifted up slightly, and watched my body jolt on his dining room table each time I took him.

I slid my hands up, both of them diving into his hair and clenching as other parts of me started doing the same thing.

“Hold on, Cherie,” he grunted.

“Yeah, baby.”

He knew it was happening when my body tensed around him, under him, my * grasping when he repeated, “Hold on tight, Cherie.”

I held on tight as I came hard, and I kept holding on tight as he took me harder, driving himself to his own orgasm and taking me along for the ride.

It way didn’t suck, feeling mine hovering while I also felt Merry get his.

It took its time and left both of us, but we didn’t move. We didn’t speak.

So Merry’s face was in the side of my neck when, minutes later, he yet again repeated, “Hold on.”

I squeezed him with everything (which meant everything) as I pointed out, “I am holding on.”

“No,” he whispered against my neck, and the way he said it, it was my heart that squeezed.

He shifted his lips to my ear.

“No,” he said again.

He lifted his head and I righted mine so he could catch my eyes.

He did and he was looking deep when he finished.

“Don’t let go.”

When he said that, that was when everything I had didn’t squeeze.

It spasmed.

We stared at each other and we did it awhile before I lifted my head from the table, touched his nose with mine, then dropped back.

“No flowers,” I whispered.

He closed his eyes slowly.

I held on.

He opened them.

“You’re never gonna get those from me, baby.”

“I can live with that,” I replied instantly.

“My job…anything can happen.”

“I can live with that too.”

“We go the distance, Ethan’s gonna be it, Cher. Don’t want kids. Never did. I see your brown eyes in his face. He’s a great kid. That works for me.”

This was shocking.

It was also a bummer.

Because if we went the distance, I wanted to see his beautiful blue eyes in our kid’s face.

But if he felt he needed to protect our child from the loss he suffered by not having one, I could get that.

Still…

“Is that a bottom line deal breaker, or is that open to discussion at a later date?” I asked.

He started to close down. “Baby—”

I held on tight.

“Merry, I get you need to know I’m where you need me to be. And I promise to do my best to be where you need me to be. But I also gotta know you’re gonna do what you can to be where I need you to be. And there’s a lotta things I like about you, gorgeous. And high on that list is your eyes. You got mine times two. Don’t close the door on me gettin’ the same thing.”

“Even if we made a kid, you couldn’t be sure he’d get my eyes,” he pointed out.

“Your eyes are so beautiful, Merry, it’d be worth the shot.”

Those eyes flashed as his lips grunted, “Jesus.”

“Just sayin’, he or she doesn’t get yours, they’ll get mine, so you’d get that times three.”

Something else flashed in his eyes, surprise and unease.