Hard to Resist

chapter THREE



“WHAT ARE YOU DOING with that torture device?” Tony was referring to the vacuum cleaner, which Ethan was running over his living room rug. Tony had come over to borrow some wrenches, and he’d stayed to kibitz.

“Cleaning?”

“Why?”

“Because it needs it.”

Tony sniffed the air. “I smell furniture polish. And your dishwasher’s running, too.”

Ethan turned off the vacuum and unplugged it. “Any law against that?”

Tony narrowed his eyes. “You got a girl coming over?”

Was it that obvious? “Kat Holiday is coming over to get her cat,” he said casually.

“Aha. I’ll get lost, then.”

“You don’t have to,” Ethan said, as he shoved the vacuum into a hall closet.

“But you want me to. You already said you don’t think I should hit on her.”

True enough. Tony had a way of overwhelming women—extravagant dinners, flowers, gifts, lavish compliments. All of it sincere.

He could fall head over heels for a woman in ten minutes. But his romances always burned hot and quick, then fizzled. Usually, the woman got tired of Tony’s devotion and dumped him, causing lots of despair and teeth-gnashing—until the next woman came along. And there was always another one.

Ethan didn’t want Kat to be just another of his friend’s conquests in a long line of them.

“The wrenches are with my other tools in the garage. You remember where the key is.”

Tony gave him a knowing look and sauntered toward the kitchen and out the back door.

Maybe Ethan would ask Kat out. Just a friendly low-key date. They could go to a ball game and include Samantha—if the child got over being terrified of him. That was something else he needed to worry about.

The doorbell rang at exactly ten. Not wanting to appear overeager, Ethan took his time getting to the door, Bashira draped over his shoulder. The kitten—who turned out to be orange, once the soot had been washed off—had spent a good deal of his time riding on Ethan’s shoulder.

Ethan schooled his face, then opened the door, and there she was, looking fifty times better than he’d imagined. She wore a skirt, revealing spectacular, bare tan legs, and a wispy blouse with flowers. Her abundant, chocolate-brown hair had been rolled into a loose coil atop her head, but several wild curls had escaped to frame her round, soft face, which reminded him of one of those Renaissance portraits of the Madonna.

She smiled when she saw him, but her gaze was on the kitten. “Bashira! Aren’t you making yourself comfortable.”

Ethan opened the door wider to let her inside. “He’s a handful. Gets into trouble, if you don’t watch him every minute.”

“Don’t I know it? Cat-proofing my apartment was more trouble than child-proofing.” She held out her hands, and Ethan transferred the kitten to her. She cuddled Bashira against her cheek, cooing softly. “Oh, your poor little kitty ears. You must have been so hurt and scared.” She looked up at Ethan, her big brown eyes suspiciously shiny, and he felt his knees wobble. “I can’t thank you enough for taking the trouble to rescue him. Samantha will be so happy to see him again.”

“Tony is really the one who rescued him.” Ethan didn’t want to remind Kat of Tony, but he believed in giving credit where it was due. “Where is Samantha? Is she doing okay?”

“She’s with her father this weekend, while I deal with stuff,” she said brightly, but then her smile faded slightly. “You can’t imagine how much there is to do.”

“You have five minutes for a cup of coffee, though, right? I just put on a fresh pot.”

She looked tempted for the moment, but then she shook her head. “I’ve got to find a new apartment. You’d think it wouldn’t be that hard, but every place I’ve looked at is either too expensive, won’t take pets or it’s just…yuck.” She bit her full lower lip and buried her face in the kitten’s fur.

He could tell she was struggling with her emotions. Ethan’s mind raced. He had a vacant apartment. It was small and it still needed some work, but it was livable. “I have an idea.”

Five minutes later, Kat was walking around the one-bedroom apartment above his garage, checking out the single closet.

“Not that I have much to put in the closet,” she said with a laugh.

“I know it’s probably smaller than you want,” Ethan said. “And the kitchen is awful. But I’m putting in new cabinets and appliances.”

“It’s really not so bad,” she said. “So how much rent would you charge?”

He shrugged. “It was just sitting here empty. You don’t have to pay me rent.”

“What? Of course I do.” She looked at him like he was a little bit crazy. And maybe he was. Any normal person would charge rent. But he couldn’t see himself taking money out of Kat’s pocket, not when she’d just lost everything in a fire.

“Tell you what,” Ethan said. “I’ll charge you rent. But you don’t have to pay me now. You’re going to need money for a lot of stuff. We can defer it until you’re back on your feet.”

“That’s very generous of you. But I make it a policy never to go into debt. It’s something I counsel my girls on, over and over.”

“Your girls?” She had more than one?

“The StrongGirls. It’s a program I’m running for teenage girls. I try to teach them to become independent and take responsibility for their lives. We do group and individual counseling, life-skills coaching, relationship coaching, help them with job applications, encourage teamwork and networking and goal-setting—a little bit of everything.”

Ethan was impressed. He figured she did something for a living, but he hadn’t imagined that. “You’re running the whole program?”

“Well, that sounds more impressive than it is. I came up with the concept and curriculum, and I got the grant that allowed me to start it up. But it’s a fledgling program. I only have four groups of girls, two employees and a tiny storefront office. But it’s going really well, so far. Zero pregnancies, zero dropouts—” She stopped herself. “I am so sorry. I’ve been living and breathing this program for more than a year and I drone on and on about it at the slightest encouragement.”

“Hey, don’t apologize. It sounds like you’re doing something great.” Great, but she probably wasn’t making a lot of money. “Really, you don’t have to pay me rent.”

She shook her head. “I couldn’t look my girls in the eye if I accepted charity from you, when I’m perfectly able to handle this. That’s what being a StrongGirl is all about.” She pulled her checkbook from her purse. “So how much is the rent?”

“You’re taking the apartment?”

“Yes. I love this neighborhood. I’ve wanted to live here since I first moved to Oak Cliff.”

Ethan reluctantly named a figure. It was less than he could probably get on the open market, but not so low that Kat would think he was giving her charity. He hadn’t realized she would be so touchy about someone trying to help her out.

She wrote out the check for the first month’s rent and handed it to him. “You should also be charging me a security deposit and a pet deposit, you know.”

“I trust you.”

She looked at him, perplexed. “You don’t even know me.”

“I’m a good judge of character. Anyway, we’ll soon know each other better.” Maybe a lot better.

Her eyes widened slightly, as if she’d read his thoughts. Their gazes held for a long moment. He could almost see the sparks flying between them.

Unable to bear the tension a moment longer without touching her, he broke the silence. “So, when do you want to move in? I work tomorrow—twenty-four on, forty-eight off. But any ‘off’ day I can help you.”

She waved away his offer. “I only have a few things. I can manage.”

Right. She had lost all of her belongings. “What about furniture?”

“I’ll get it worked out,” she said breezily. “One step at a time.”

“Bashira can stay with me until you get settled in the apartment. No sense moving him twice.”

“Are you sure?”

“Sure, I’m sure.”

She stood on her toes and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. “Thank you, again. You’re a lifesaver in more ways than one.”

From his front door, he watched as she made her way to her beat-up compact car. His face tingled where her lips had touched it. It was such an innocent kiss, barely a peck, but it had electrified every nerve.

He hoped he was doing the right thing, having Kat so close. He liked her. He wanted to get to know her better. He could see that something might develop between them. But if things didn’t work out, her proximity could get uncomfortable in a hurry.

* * *

KAT SPENT the rest of the day power shopping. It was Saturday, and every store was packed. She moved through Wal-Mart like a tornado, filling her cart with everything from sneakers to toothpaste to cleaning products. Then it was on to a discount furniture store to buy a futon and bed frame, as well as a twin mattress and springs. She was determined to get Samantha the canopy bed she wanted, but there wasn’t time today to track one down. It was when she tried to buy a small table and chairs that her credit card maxed out.

She’d never had a credit card refused in her life. But she’d never charged thousands of dollars of medical care to Visa, either. She would be able to pay off the card, or at least a good chunk of it, when her insurance came through, but that wouldn’t be until next week at the earliest.

With a sigh she took out the book of temporary checks she’d gotten from the bank, looked at the balance and decided the table would have to wait.

At least she had the use of a pickup truck. Deb had been kind enough to trade cars with Kat.

It was almost dark by the time Kat pulled into her new driveway with her belongings. Her plan was to bring the cleaning supplies in first and give the apartment a good scrubbing. It obviously had sat vacant a long time and looked it. But the first thing she noticed when she opened the gate into the backyard were the lights blazing in her new place.

Curious, she climbed the stairs. As she neared the door, she heard voices and laughter coming from inside.

She knocked, feeling a bit ridiculous since this was her own apartment. Ethan opened the door with a big grin. “Kat. Welcome home.”

Ethan and two other people stood in her living room, watching her expectantly. One of the others was Tony Veracruz, the paramedic who had transported Samantha and Kat to the hospital. He gave her a megawatt smile and a two-finger salute. The woman, she soon learned, was Priscilla Garner, another firefighter who’d fought her apartment fire.

“So, what are you all doing here?” Kat asked. But the answer was evident. She saw brooms, a mop, a bucket, various rags and a bottle of Murphy’s oil soap, and the air was full of cleaning smells.

“I couldn’t let you move in with the place such a mess,” Ethan said.

“And he drafted us to help,” Priscilla added.

“This is so nice,” Kat said, giving Ethan a reproving look, “but you didn’t have to. You’re already doing me such a huge favor letting me live here.”

“It’s no big deal,” Ethan said.

“I was going to do the cleaning.” She pointed to the broom and mop and cleaning products she’d brought. “But thanks.”

Ever since her divorce, when she’d realized how much she had allowed Chuck to do for her without giving as much in return, she’d felt uncomfortable whenever anyone did her a favor. If someone donated time or money or materials to the StrongGirls program, that was one thing. But to her personally… Well, it brought up all kinds of feelings, inadequacy being the major one.

Did Ethan think that just because she’d been through a fire, she wasn’t capable of cleaning her own apartment?

She and Virginia Wilmington, her staff psychologist, had talked at length about this issue of Kat’s, and she knew her feelings were exaggerated and not entirely logical. But it was a knee-jerk response.

She stifled it. “How about I spring for dinner, then?” she suggested brightly. “Pizza?” She could afford that, at least.

“Pizza’s always good,” Ethan said. “But no way are you paying. I wouldn’t feel right about that.”

Why not? she wondered. “You’re not one of those chauvinists who thinks women ought not to pay for anything, are you?”

Priscilla laughed. “Honey, you’re talking to a male firefighter. They’re all chauvinists.”

“Hey,” Tony objected as he wiped off the last of the grime from a window. “Would a chauvinist clean windows? Anyway, we stick up for you at the station.”

“You guys are the most enlightened of the bunch,” she agreed. “But that is so not saying much.”

“Where is your furniture?” Ethan asked Kat. “We’ll help you move in.”

“It’s out in my truck.” She nodded in the general direction of the driveway. “But it’s just a few things, and I can move…” She didn’t get a chance to finish. The men were out the door.

Priscilla shrugged. “Testosterone.”

“They really don’t have to do this,” Kat said. She hated being reduced to a clichéd helpless female. But Ethan commandeered the transfer of items from the truck to the apartment and he wouldn’t let her touch anything heavy.

It didn’t take long. She hadn’t been kidding when she said she didn’t have much furniture—just the twin bed, the futon and a cute little coffee table, marked way down because it had a scratch.

“Is this all?” Ethan asked, studying the results with a doubtful eye.

Okay, it did look bare. But that would change once she got her insurance. “It’s all for now. I didn’t have time to get more than a few essentials. I’ll go shopping next week.”

“You don’t even have a table,” Ethan objected. “Where are you going to eat?”

“I can sit on the floor in front of the coffee table.” She’d certainly taken meals in stranger places. Like when she was a little girl, standing outside the door of her apartment, eating chili right out of the can waiting for her mother to come home.

“Kat,” Priscilla said, “I’d love to stay for pizza, but I have a racquetball game in twenty minutes.” She nudged Tony.

“Oh, right. I have to go, too,” he said. “But let us know if you need anything.”

Kat thanked them both again, and they cleared out.

“Guess it’s just you and me,” Ethan said. “I have a coupon for Home Run Pizza.”

Kat was starving. She might not have a table, but Ethan did. The idea of relaxing, putting her feet up and shooting the breeze with handsome Ethan Basque had a certain appeal. But just then her cell phone rang. Kat saw that it was Chuck’s number and she answered immediately.

“Mommy?” Samantha’s tone was uncharacteristically timid. “Can you come get me?”

“Is something wrong?” Kat’s heart rate accelerated.

“No, I just want you to come. I miss you.”

Normally, Samantha loved weekends with her father. She adored her baby half sister and liked helping take care of her. “I miss you, too, sweetie. Can I talk to your dad, please?”

Chuck reported that Sam had been fretful all day, so they agreed to end the weekend visit early just this once. “Tell her I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

Ethan puttered around while Kat talked on the phone, but she knew he’d heard.

“Samantha needs me,” Kat explained, her voice tinged with regret.

“Any reason we couldn’t all have pizza?”

Kat shook her head. “I’m sorry, Ethan. I hope Sam won’t still be afraid of you, but I don’t know. And frankly, I’m not up to dealing with another bout of tears or hysteria tonight.”

“I understand. Promise you’ll ask if you need anything.”

“I promise.” But he’d already done so much. How could she accept even more? She’d fought hard for her independence, and now she was teaching her StrongGirls to do the same. She wanted them to be able to rely on themselves when they reached adulthood—not on the government, not on alcohol or drugs, and not on a man.

She’d set herself up as a role model. The way she coped with this detour in her life would provide a good example—if she handled things right. If she stayed strong.

Ethan took both her hands in his and gave them an encouraging squeeze. He drew her closer, but then he hesitated, as if he had the urge to kiss her but wasn’t sure if he should. The thought of Ethan’s kiss sent a thrilling shiver up her back.

She’d opened that door by giving him an impulsive kiss on the cheek earlier today, so she shouldn’t be surprised. But she was, a little. After her grueling day, without even one look in a mirror, she was hardly a glamour girl, and the idea that he was apparently attracted to her was unsettling. Not unpleasant, just unsettling.

But she was too tired to think about whether it was good or bad, these budding feelings between her and her handsome rescuer. It was just a kiss.

He must have sensed her acquiescence, because he moved in closer. Then his mouth was on hers, warm, welcoming.

It felt good. It felt different than any kiss she’d ever experienced, though she couldn’t have said why.

For a few seconds, anyway, she forgot about everything else and just let herself enjoy the feeling. She gave herself over to the sensations.

He could have pressed his advantage, but he didn’t. He withdrew slowly. “I’ll hold you to that promise.”

Later, as she drove to North Dallas to pick up Sam, she wondered exactly what she had promised. She couldn’t remember.