I shook my head again.
He stood close behind me and cupped the paper towel between my legs.
“Are you angry with me?” he whispered.
“No,” I whispered back. “I’m not angry at all. I just feel stupid. I didn’t know this is what happens.”
“I’m sure it’s all out now,” Mr. Connelly said. He took the paper towel and balled it in his fist.
I bent over and pulled up my panties and jeans while Mr. Connelly stood watching. When I was clothed and composed once more, I looked at him. He seemed tired but happy.
“I love you,” he said. “I know you may think I was using you, and I realize I was being rough, but I was showing you how much I love you. I don’t want anyone else. I want you, Cadence.”
I nodded and wrapped my arms around his waist, holding on to him hard.
He leaned over and whispered in my ear. “But I won’t say it wasn’t fun straightening out that attitude of yours.”
I pushed against his chest, hanging my face as I felt it ache bright red. He chuckled and opened the closet door.
“I’m going to the bathroom to get rid of this,” he said, holding up the used paper towel. “You need to eat something before the next period.”
I nodded and followed him out of the room.
***
“What are you doing here? The bell’s gonna ring in, like, five minutes,” Avery said, watching me plop down beside her with a Coke and bag of chips.
“I was told to eat something,” I said, still dazed.
“Why are you all red?” she asked, eyeing me suspiciously. “You don’t have P.E. before lunch, do you?”
No, but I had one hell of a workout.
I shook my head.
Avery narrowed her eyes. “Oh. My. God.”
“What?” I snapped.
“You just fucked Mr. Connelly, didn’t you?” she whispered.
“Hush! You wanna tell the whole cafeteria?”
Avery looked around. “Cadence? We’re the only ones at this table. Now did you or did you not just fuck your very hot math teacher at school?”
“Just shut up with the “f” word,” I said. “I don’t wanna hear it.”
“Get over yourself and answer me.”
“Yes! Okay? Yes we did!” I shoved a chip in my mouth.
Avery slapped her hand on the table. “Oh. My. God!”
“Stop saying that,” I hissed.
“Was it good?” she asked, nudging me.
I grinned reluctantly. “Amazing.”
“Where?” she squealed. “Where did it happen?”
“In his classroom closet.”
“Ooo, you two are dirty. I love it!” she said. “Has this happened before?”
“No.”
“Well, what made you guys do it? I mean, talk about taking one huge ass risk.”
“A fight.”
Avery sighed dreamily. “God, I love fucking after a good fight.”
“Will you stop saying the “f” word?!”
“What did you fight about?”
“Ms. Gibbons,” I said, scowling.
“Oh my God. She is such a freaking ho. Was she trying to get with your man?”
I nodded.
“A ho and a bitch,” Avery said. “But I don’t get it. Why’d you get mad at Mr. Connelly over it?”
“Can we talk about something else?” I asked, stuffing my face.
“Oh, I get it. You were super jealous and decided to pick a fight. Am I right?” Avery asked, grinning.
“Maybe,” I mumbled.
“Jeez, Cadence. Grow the fuck up already,” Avery said.
“I’m leaving if you say that word one more time,” I warned.
“Fine. But you need to grow up,” Avery replied. “I mean, did he give you any reason to believe that he wanted to get with that Gibbons ho bag?”
I shook my head.
“Then what is your problem?”
I sighed. “I’m terrified of losing him, okay? I’m just this ordinary girl who’s not very good at math. I don’t know why he loves me. He keeps telling me, but I can’t commit it to memory. I’m totally insecure, and I hate myself for it. I don’t want to be the insecure girl.”
“You know what I keep hearing?” Avery asked. “‘I’.”
I sighed again.
“This has nothing to do with Mr. Connelly and the way he feels about you. It’s evident. He fu—”
“AVERY!”
“Sorry. He made love to you in his closet,” she said. “At school. Big risk. That’s total love.”
I chuckled because it sounded so stupid, him doing me in his closet.
“The issue here is you and how you feel about yourself. You need an attitude adjustment.”
“Well, I got one,” I replied before I could stop myself.
“Really?” Avery sounded intrigued.
The bell rang. I stood up, and she grabbed my wrist.
“Sit. Tell. And hurry,” she ordered.
“Are you serious?”
“You bet I am.”
I rolled my eyes. “He did me up against the wall from behind.”
I’ve never seen someone smile so brilliantly. I swear I could see all of Avery’s teeth. Including her back molars.
“But you’re, like, a munchkin,” she said. “Ergonomically it couldn’t work. What? Did he do you on his knees?”
I blushed fiercely. “He lifted me off the floor.”
“Come again?”
“Are you trying to be clever?” I asked.
“He lifted you off the floor? Like how?”
“We’re gonna be late for class,” I replied.
“So don’t care right now. Tell me how he did it,” she said.
“He reached around and hooked his arm around my hips. And then he just lifted me up. Like I didn’t weigh anything. Before I knew it, he was doing me.”
Avery’s mouth hung open in disbelief. “That’s. So. Hot. And impossible. And freaking hot.”
I shrugged.
“This guy totally digs you,” Avery said. “Has he said he loves you?”
I nodded.
“He’s doing you in the closet and he loves you? Well, Cadence. It’s obvious this guy’s a keeper.”
I burst out laughing. “Can we go to class now?”
“Ugh. Whatever,” Avery said. “Listen, I know we have this rule . . .”
“I think we’re long past the rule, Avery,” I said.
“I’m dying to know more,” she confessed.
I grinned. Usually it was me begging Avery for more information. I was never on the other side. She knew everything it seemed. Experienced all of it. What could I possibly tell her that she didn’t already know?
She watched me as I grabbed my books from my locker.
“Well?” she insisted.
I closed the locker door softly. “I’ll tell you more. If you’re good.”