“I hate you!” It came from deep within my chest, one last burst of energy. I screamed at the top of my lungs, loud and long, burning my throat until it went hoarse. I screamed for the girls who endured this torture in the past. I screamed for Beth who couldn’t survive it. I screamed for my uncertain future, my rights that were being violated, and dropped to my side, passing out at the height of my terror, heartbeat pulsing fast and hard into starry blackness.
I awoke again but didn’t open my eyes. Actually, I couldn’t open my eyes. My lids were too heavy, so I had to rely on my ears to help me discover where I was. My arms were lifted over my head, wrists secured together with something thin and tight, and I vaguely remember feeling it once before. Somewhere, a long time ago. I tugged on my arms but couldn’t pull them down to my sides. Only then did I realize my shirt and bra were missing, leaving me half naked on an unfamiliar bed.
“You sure she’s drugged enough?”
“Dude, she’s out of it. I slipped a pill in her drink earlier and gave her another half just a few minutes ago,” Cal said.
“I thought we said two pills.” I recognized the voice. I just couldn’t match it to a name.
“I didn’t want to take the chance. People die from that shit all the time, you know,” Cal said.
“So?”
The question sent a shiver down my spine.
“Look, I was all over her tits and she didn’t feel a thing. Relax. If she wakes up, she’ll still be too out of it to really know what’s going on,” Cal said.
“She seemed to know what the fuck was happening to her in your closet.”
“Man, you know how this shit goes. They go in and out. When it’s all over, they’ll be so fucked up they won’t know if it was a dream or reality,” Cal said. “You need to chill out.”
“What was that shit anyway? Putting her in the closet? You’re one sick fuck.” I realized it was Tim speaking.
“I really just wanted to see if she’d pee her pants,” Cal replied.
Tim chuckled. “Man. You’re messed up.”
The panic started instantly. My head swam too much for my body to be completely consumed with fear, but I felt my heartbeat from far away increase a little, signaling danger, and I was incapable of fleeing for safety. Out of pure reflex or instinct, I pulled hard on my binds.
“Brooklyn?” Cal asked.
I froze.
“Brooklyn,” Cal taunted. “Are you waking up to join us?”
He ran his hands over my breasts, squeezing them hard until I yelped. He pinched my nipples, and then I felt his mouth on me, sucking long and hard. He drew away abruptly, and I felt his hot breath in my ear.
“I love you, Brooklyn,” he said, and I wanted to vomit from fear and disgust.
I felt his hand snake down my belly and in between my legs. I fought hard to keep them closed, rolling my hips from one side to the other, but all I managed to do was assist Cal in sliding my shorts off more easily. My panties followed shortly after, and I screamed as loudly as I could. It felt weak and heavy on my tongue, but I screamed anyway until someone’s hand clapped down firmly on my mouth, stifling my cries for help.
“Who wants to be first to love Brooklyn?” Cal asked.
I shook my head violently, twisting my body and pulling frantically on the ties around my wrists.
“Now, Brooklyn,” Cal said. “There’s no use doing that. Why don’t you just enjoy it? You wanted this, remember? You were the one snooping around, trying to find out stuff about our league. We figured you wanted in pretty badly, so here’s your chance.”
I felt two sets of hands pry my thighs apart and another touch me between my legs.
“Let’s make her come.”
A new voice, and familiar, too.
“That’s generous,” Tim said.
“Well, it’s not rape if they come,” the voice replied, and the boys laughed.
Parker! It was Parker’s voice!
Three of them, I realized, and I had no chance. I was becoming more lucid, thinking back to the beginning of the year, my ludicrous plan for revenge, and then the forgiveness that came when I realized I didn’t have to sacrifice myself, that Beth wouldn’t want that. I learned to forgive myself, to move on, and found a new peace in protecting the girls at my school. But now I was trapped, about to experience violence I was certain I could never recover from, and the terror turned me primal. I bit down as hard as I could on the hand covering my mouth, breaking skin.
“Fucking bitch!” Parker yelled.
“Stop!” Cal said, and I heard a slapping sound.
For the first time, I opened my eyes fully though it was painful. Cal was holding Parker’s wrist, poised in the air above my face.
“You wanna leave a mark?” Cal hissed.
“She fucking drew blood, man!” Parker cried.
“Then go wrap it,” Cal replied. He looked down at me. “Does someone need another dose?” he asked, resuming the probing between my legs.
I shook my head, feeling the tears well up and run down the sides of my face. They pooled in my ears, distorting my hearing.
“I think so,” Cal said, moving his finger in and out of me. He looked over to Tim who let go of my left leg and disappeared from the room.
I immediately closed my legs, trying to squeeze Cal’s hand.
Cal sighed patiently. “Brooklyn, spread your legs.”
“Fuck you,” I spat.