Yeah…that’d take some getting used to.
I opened the fridge and stared at the vacant shelves staring back at me. I’d have to make my way to the store before the night ended. Too bad I had no idea where that was. Stepping out of the kitchen, I followed the hallway to the bathroom and stood in the doorway. More exposed brick with the lower half of the wall covered in white subway tile. A wide window nearly stretched from one wall all the way to the other. A large, cast-iron, claw-foot bathtub with silver fixtures sat almost in the middle of the floor, surrounded by a pure white shower curtain. Everything was new from the looks of it, which was nice because Kira and I wouldn’t have to do much other than decorate – Kira’s area of expertise. I looked around one last time and then walked off again.
The silence was deafening, leaving me to face my own thoughts – thoughts that I couldn’t run from anymore….thoughts of Sam.
A long sigh escaped as I shoved my hands in the pockets of my jeans and leaned against the wall. It felt strange being so close to her again and yet feeling like there was still so much distance between us. She was somewhere nearby, probably aware of the fact that I’d moved to her city, thanks to Terrell, but there was no communication between us. It almost felt unnatural.
All those years searching for her, wanting to be close to her – and now I was, and couldn’t do anything about it. Not that I had any desire to.
In Boston, I was reminded of how dangerous it can be for the two of us to be in one another’s company, but that didn’t stop me from mulling over the ‘what if’s”.
What if I did take Terrell’s advice and called her, invited her out for coffee or lunch or something just to talk?
What if that led to us having to face our feelings head-on?
And what if I stopped caring about the consequences and gave in to the temptation that was now right at my fingertips?
When I looked down, my phone was in hand and I wasn’t even sure when I’d taken it from my pocket. My thoughts were on scrolling to Terrell’s name and having him text me Sam’s number. I shook my head at how easily I’d succumbed to my imagination and realized that I’d have to be careful here alone. Clearly it would be easy for me to slip into old habits if the right opportunity presented itself.
I shoved off from the wall and stared down at the hustle and bustle on the streets. My stomach growled and I was again reminded that I had zero food in my fridge. Right below my window, at the corner, was a kiosk advertising that they sold the ‘best smoothies in the city’. That was good enough for me.
Taking the stairs, I exited through the front of the building and was face to face with the an elderly man who looked like, if he didn’t love what he did so much, he would’ve retired a decade ago.
“How can I help you?” he asked when I approached.
“Uh, yeah…let me get a large strawberry banana smoothie, please.”
He smiled again and then turned his back to prepare my drink. While I waited I took in the fast-paced scenery around me. My heart raced just watching the people around scurry in various directions – all probably headed nowhere special.
The man faced me and handed me the drink, still grinning – yeah, he loves his job.
“You know, I think this is the most popular flavor that I sell,” he said as he reached for a straw and a couple napkins. “I have a young lady who comes by like clockwork every Wednesday at the exact same time just for one of these babies.” There was an air of pride in his tone.
I smiled back. “Oh yeah?”
He nodded. “She’s a cute little thing, too. I could set my watch by her. Whizzes by here in a rush, drops the exact change in my hand, and then disappears down the street that way somewhere.” He met my gaze again. “Hopefully you’ll enjoy it as much as she does.”
His good mood was infectious. “I’m sure I will.”
I’d just turned to walk away when he spoke again. “Name’s Giuseppe. You living in this building now?”