“She’s not over you, is she?” I asked bluntly.
“She doesn’t really have a choice. I’m over her. That kind of throws a wrench in any plans she might have, don’t you think?” I found it strangely easy to trust AJ, so I immediately let go of the anxiety I was beginning to feel.
“Why didn’t it work out with you two?”
“She just wanted something different than I did. For her, it was all about a physical connection and she didn’t have much to offer other than that. I eventually lost interest and let her go.”
I felt a little ill at the thought of what he was implying when he said, ‘physical connection’. This made me wonder if it was a solitary incident or more of a regular occurrence throughout their relationship. I wanted to let the thought go, but it was impossible. “Let’s change the subject. I don’t want to spend our time together talking about her. We have better things to talk about.” I insisted.
“Definitely,” he agreed. A.J was thoughtful for a moment. “Why don’t you show me some of your artwork?” I didn’t speak right away. The thought of letting him up in my studio was unnerving. I didn’t care much for criticism, especially when it came to my paintings. Antonio had never even seen anything that I’d done. I fought against my nerves and slowly rose up from my bed. AJ followed me as I paced up the stairs slowly to buy myself time. I flicked the light switch and rounded the corner. Revealing my work was about the equivalent to me standing in front of him naked. My innermost thoughts and ideas were out in front of him for him to judge me and I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t extremely uncomfortable. As I watched him walk around the perimeter of the room evaluating, I held my breath and stared at the floor. It was almost more than I could stand.
“You’re really talented. I didn’t expect for you to be this good.” He laughed a little to himself. His eyes were still on one of the pictures as he spoke.
“Thanks.” I was still uneasy despite his compliment.
He continued to walk slowly around the room. “So, who’s your favorite artist? Who inspires you?” I’m sure that he meant for this to be a simple question, but there were so many that I admired that naming one was next to impossible.
“Well…...I pretty much like all art from the Italian Renaissance. I’m a fan of both Piero della Francesca and Jan Van Eyck, but if I had to pick a favorite it would definitely be Botticelli. Birth of Venus has always stood out from the rest.”
AJ turned to look at me momentarily before returning his gaze to the art work on the wall. His expression was curious. “What is it that draws you in?” He asked.
I liked that he was genuinely interested in something that I was so passionate about. I tried not to smile when responding. “It’s just a beautiful concept I guess. There’s Venus being blown to shore by the god Zephyr and the goddess Flora just after she was formed. Botticelli makes you feel like the world was just……waiting for her.” I paused and fidgeted with my nails while I gathered my thoughts. “Awaiting the arrival of real love.”
He turned back around and stared at me for another moment. I couldn’t make myself look away as my heart sped up. “Do you want to go back down now?” I asked nervously.
He smiled at me, realizing how uncomfortable I was. “Sure.”
I felt a little bad for rushing him, but I couldn’t help it. We walked back down the stairs and returned to my room. I sat beside him on the edge of the bed and my heart rate finally slowed to a normal pace.