As I reach for the door, I hear Alyssa asking Melanie to sit with her so they can get to know one another. I’m not certain how I feel about this because I’ve spent six years avoiding talking about anything to do with my time with Melanie. Having her in the house again is fucking with my head, but if I call the agency and request a different companion, Alyssa will ask questions. I only hope that Melanie was sincere when she guaranteed me she can be professional at all times when she’s on the job.
No matter how much I tell myself to turn and walk away, I can’t take a single step. I lean against the door jamb, trying to hear Melanie’s melodic voice as she rattles off her credentials. I don’t need to hear them because the only accomplishment I was not around for was the day she received her Master’s degree.
“Look, Melanie, I’m not sure if you got the memo, but I’m dying.” My heart clenches at my wife’s words. As unconventional as the beginning of our marriage might have been, I can’t bear the thought of the day I wake up and she’s no longer here. “I’ve had some of the best doctors in the world treating me and they told me there’s nothing more they can do at this point, so truthfully, I’m not sure how much good any fancy degrees or anything like that are going to do me. I want to know about you. You’re going to be my sidekick from now until the end, so I think we should know something about one another.”
My ears perk up, waiting to hear what Melanie will say next. I can almost see her picking her nails, trying to think of something safe to share. “There really isn’t all that much,” she responds. “I spend so much of my time with my clients, I usually go home, have a glass of wine and curl up with my dog for the night. Sometimes, my friend Stacey manages to drag me out of the house to a concert, but that’s rare.”
Fingernails dig into my palms as I clench my fists at the sound of that woman’s name crossing Melanie’s lips. I shouldn’t care, but it bothers me that she and Stacey are still friends. The selfish part of me likes to think that Melanie was upset enough by what happened with us that she realized her best friend is a bad influence. Hopefully, Stacey has matured over the years, but I’m not holding my breath.
“No boyfriend waiting for you to come home?” My stomach roils at the very thought of Melanie being with another man. I lean in closer, needing this answer more than any other.
“No, I don’t date,” she says flatly. I release the breath I had been holding as I waited for her answer, relieved in a twisted way that there isn’t anyone in her life. It’s not that I don’t want her to be happy, but I’d rather not have to admit that someone else can give her everything when I failed her.
“Are you kidding me? You’re freaking beautiful, I can’t believe the guys aren’t pounding down your door for a chance to win your heart.” Lovely, now Alyssa is going to start digging to get to the root of why Melanie doesn’t date. I just have to hope those roots are shallow and have to do with a recent heartbreak.
“Oh, there have been guys who have tried, but I don’t really see myself as the type of girl who is going to find her Prince Charming any time soon.” Her words hang low in the air as neither woman speaks. Knowing that Alyssa is awake and Melanie is with her, I turn back to the kitchen, needing a minute before facing the only two women I’ve ever loved sitting next to one another.
Chapter 2
“So, how was the first day?” Stacey asks as soon as I answer the phone. I pour my first glass of wine for the evening while I wait for my dinner to finish heating in the microwave. I know the freezer meals I’m addicted to are filled with crap that will probably kill me someday, but after spending up to twelve hours a day with my clients, the last thing I want to do is come home and cook. Not to mention the fact that cooking for one is depressing and pointless, like a daily reminder that I’m alone.
“It was good,” I blatantly lie. It’s a safe response because that has become my standard answer when she calls the night after I start a new assignment. I’m not about to set her off on a tirade by telling her who hired me this time. She was never Xavier’s number one fan, and after the night he left me because I went to an adult party after telling him I was staying home to work on my thesis, he became public enemy number one in her eyes.