R: I know you asked for wide open spaces, but will you please just hear me out right here, right now?
J: Cute nineties songs won’t change anything, asshole.
R: You’re just too legit to quit.
I rolled my eyes and replied.
J: Not helping.
R: Please, I know I fucked up. Give me another chance.
J: I need more than words.
R: I know. Will you please come on over and I’ll show you?
I chewed on the inside of my cheek as I contemplated what to say. On one hand, I wanted to hear him out, but there was also that part of me that said screw it. He messed up, I should cut my losses and run. Then there was the part, deep down inside of me, that reminded me that he challenged me in ways that no other guy had. And didn’t treat me like a dumb girl. Without overanalyzing too much, because, honestly, I hated myself a little that I was willing to give him a second chance, I punched in a text and hit send.
J: What about your dad?
R: He’s on a fishing trip. Won’t be back till tomorrow night
Should I say yes? If things went south, I could always leave. Payton hurled in the bathroom, sounding like a mix between a dying seal and a roaring lion. Ick.
J: Hold on. Need to check on roommate.
I walked back into the bathroom. “Hey, sure I can’t get you anything else?”
“Can you get me a red Gatorade? I ran out last night and want something stronger than water.” Payton rested her head against the toilet seat.
“Sure thing.” I smoothed my hand over her head and breathed through my mouth, trying not to inhale too much of the rank bathroom fumes. Air freshener would also be making its way into my cart when I went the store.
I walked to the convenience store a couple blocks from our apartment and bought a couple Gatorades and a can of Glade. Payton’s toilet needs had subsided—thank God for Pepto—by the time I got back to the apartment, so I tucked her into bed with her drinks and a puke bucket.
“Anything else I can get you?” I smoothed my hand over her hair.
“I’m good. Just want to get some rest.”
I fiddled with my hands as I sat on her bed. “Do you mind if I go out for a little bit?” I felt guilty leaving her, but she seemed to be doing better. And I’d come back the second she needed me.
“Go for it. I’ll text you if things change.”
“‘Kay. Love you, bitch.”
“You too, skank.”
As I walked out of Payton’s room, I pulled out my phone and texted Ryan.
J: Okay. C U soon.
Totally cool. No reason to freak out. We would have ended up going camping together anyway since we both got this weekend off. I couldn’t kick him off a mountain, but I could hide his body in his backyard if he decided to piss me off any more.
I tried to make light of it. But after the beach and constant flirting at the store, and that mind-blowing shower sex, it was a big deal. He’d hurt me, and I wanted to know his side of the story.
The humid July Fourth night buzzed with excitement as the sun set over the horizon. I pulled my Subaru into Ryan’s driveway and, before I turned off the engine, he swaggered out the front door, crossing the pavement, straight to my car.
“Long time no see.”
I looked at my pretend watch. “A whole two hours. Think what would happen if I’d waited three,” I deadpanned. Still pissed, DeShane. Better start talking soon.
“They’d probably send me off in a straitjacket.” His lips curved into an attractive smile. My smile. At least I’d only seen him use it with me. Damn him and that gorgeous grin.
“We could arrange that. I hear straitjackets are all the rage in L.A.” I swung my legs out of the car and kicked my door shut.
“Ha-ha. Let’s get inside, troublemaker.”
I folded my arms and leaned against the car. “For the record, I’m still mad at you.”
“I’d be worried if you weren’t. Want to uphold my asshole image.”
I quirked a brow and pursed my lips. “Already going back on Compliment Thursday?”
He licked his lips as he shook his head, crossing his arms. We wound our way up the walkway and went through the double wide, red front door, stopping at the massive spiral staircase in the entryway.
“Okay, let’s hear it. You have two minutes before I get in my car and leave.”
Letting go of the door, he shoved his hands into his pockets and stared down at the floor. “I was honest when I said I didn’t know what I wanted out of us. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings. The last girl—Lex—she cheated on me.”
I put my hands on my hips and entertained thoughts of kicking this girl in the head. I never understood the cheating aspect. If people hated their relationship so much, just break up, don’t drag the other person through a ton of unneeded heartache. “And you still have feelings for her?”