Crossroad to Love (Fab Five Series)

chapter 13

“We are going to dine at a little restaurant a friend of mine owns. It’s not in the busy downtown area. It is out a little ways, but I thought you would enjoy seeing something different while you’re in town,” Ryan explained as he drove down the expressway, expertly weaving in and out of the busy Dallas traffic.

“I’m game for new experiences.” Katy laughed easily in response.

“So, how did the sight-seeing go this afternoon? I think it’s remarkable that you four have been friends for so long and still make time to get together,” he observed, trying to keep the conversation light.

“We had so much fun. I wish we could get together more often, but you know, life has a way of keeping people busy. Now that most of our children are older, maybe it will be easier for us to see each other more often. I certainly hope so, anyway. The fact that we all settled in different cities doesn’t help matters any.”

“You have a son, is that right? You mentioned yesterday he had started college.”

“Yes, Alex. He was quite the basketball player in high school, but decided not to play in college. I spoke with him on the phone last night. He was very excited for me when I told him about my interior design business.”

“I am glad he approves.”

“He has been after me for years to pursue my dreams, but I felt as if I needed to devote my time and energy to him while he was growing up. After he lost his father, I didn’t want him to feel any more alone than he already did. And Bill left me financially able to stay at home, so I saw no reason to make our lives any more stressful than they needed to be. But now it’s time for me to start a new chapter or two in my life.” She looked at Ryan and smiled.

They pulled into the parking lot of a charming, old Victorian-styled house, much larger than the one Katy lived in, and obviously renovated to become a restaurant. The parking lot was full, so this must also be a good place for dinner. She could not wait to get inside and see the interior. This would be a designer’s dream, she thought as Ryan opened her door for her and helped her out of the car. He held her hand tightly as they entered the restaurant and walked toward the reservation desk.

“We have reservations for two. O’Grady,” Ryan informed the hostess as she looked up from the desk.

“Ah, yes. Jarrett has a special table for you, Mr. O’Grady. Follow me.”

Katy looked questioningly at Ryan and he answered her unspoken question, “Jarrett is an old friend. I met him right after I moved to Dallas. He and his wife, Michelle, own this little place,” he explained as they followed the hostess.

They were led to a corner in the back of the restaurant. The décor of the room was all Katy had hoped it would be. The true Victorian charm was displayed throughout the room. Antiques and old pictures were plentiful. The table they were being seated at was in a secluded corner. She was glad. This would be perfect for talking about serious matters and getting to know each other better. Not to mention gazing into those sexy eyes of his.

“I love it already, Ryan. This place is wonderful,” she remarked as she looked around the room, drinking in the exquisite atmosphere.

“I figured it would be your cup of tea, with you being into designing and all,” he grinned.

He took the liberty of ordering the wine while Katy studied the menu.

After they had placed their orders, with Ryan helping her decide, Katy wondered when and how to approach the subject of his painful past. She decided to wait until after dinner.

She did not want to ruin the evening, and bringing up the subject might do just that. So they spent a relaxing evening looking at the antiques around the room and discussing them.

They also discussed Katy’s plans for the restaurant’s party room and the chain of new restaurants that Ryan and his family were planning to open. He was very excited at the possibilities ahead of them. Apparently these plans had been in the works for some time.

“Do you know what locations yet?” Katy ventured to ask.

“We haven’t gotten that far yet. We originally thought we would open a few more locally, but now we’re thinking of maybe branching out a little. There may possibly be one in the Midwest, one in Florida, and one in New England, to start. The problem will be finding quality people to run them, since obviously, Shane, Chloe and I can’t be in four places at once. It would also be a lot of jetting around the country for a while, getting everything organized, but that could be fun.” He glanced at her as the thought came to him that it would be fun if she were jetting around the country with him.

“Well, you can always open one in Chicago, that way you could visit me while you’re there,” Katy invited with a suggestive smile. I can’t believe I just said that, she thought to herself. What a flirt I have become since meeting this man.

“Not a bad idea, little lady, not a bad idea. I might just have to have to take you up on that.” Ryan smiled back at her as the waiter brought their dinner to the table. The food was out of this world. He had made all the right selections.

“Ryan, this food is delicious,” Katy said in awe.

“I told you that you would like it,” he answered as he took a bite of his own dinner.

“It is almost as good as ‘Chloe’s Place,’” she laughed as she looked up at her dinner partner.

“I am just glad Jarrett is not close to our place or we might have some serious competition on our hands,” he answered as he looked into her eyes, the gold flecks in his twinkling in the light.

“Am I going to get to meet your friend, Jarrett?”

“Unfortunately, not tonight. When I phoned him, he told me that he and Michelle would be out of town tonight to a family gathering of some sort. He arranged for our table and said he hoped to meet you another time. I think he was a little shocked when I told him that I was bringing a special lady with me tonight.”

“You told him that? Why would that shock him? Surely you’ve brought dates here before.”

“But I said special lady, Katy.” He hesitated before adding, “Jarrett is not used to me referring to one of my dates as special.”

Katy blushed happily at the knowledge that he indeed thought she was special.

“We need to talk later, Katy. There are some things you need to know about me.”

“You read my mind. I was thinking the same thing.”



****



They finished their dinner, laughing together at Ryan’s restaurant stories and Katy’s tales of some of the ‘Fab Four’ past experiences. Dinner was topped off with a scrumptious dessert that was to die for.

As Katy was sipping a fresh cup of coffee, Ryan began in a more serious tone, “Katy, when I told you that we needed to talk, I was very serious. I was more serious than I have been in a long time. I feel a real connection with you and that is something new for me. But there are things you need to know about my past.” He took her hand and continued. “As you probably have heard, I lost my wife several years ago. That’s when I moved from Indianapolis to Dallas.”

Katy nodded and replied, “I did know that.”

He went on, “Since coming to Dallas, I have earned quite the reputation of a so-called playboy. I admit that I’ve dated many women during the years I’ve been here, but I made a pact with myself that I would never let myself become seriously involved again. It was all fun and games. Anytime a woman started becoming serious, I immediately broke it off with her. Up until now, that has worked just fine.”

“What do you mean, up until now, Ryan?” Katy held her breath, waiting for an answer.

“Do you believe in love at first sight?” he asked her and, without waiting for an answer, continued with, “I never did until you walked into ‘Chloe’s Place’ the other evening. I have been fighting this for the two days that I have known you. This is crazy, I told myself. Ryan O’Grady, of all people, does not fall in love, let alone at first sight. I decided on the way here tonight, I’m not going to fight it anymore. Maybe it’s finally time for me to put the past behind me and move on with my life like you said you’re doing. We both seem to be at a crossroad in our lives.”

Katy looked at Ryan with tears shining in her eyes. “Oh, Ryan, I feel exactly the same way, but I thought you would think I was nuts, or that I was just another one of those women trying to get you to commit. Since I lost my husband, I haven’t had any more than an occasional social date. I was never really interested. For ten years, I have been waiting for you to enter my life, I guess. I never believed in love at first sight either, but there definitely is something happening here. But before we move on, there is something that we have to do, Ryan.”

He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it softly before he asked, “And what is that, my love?”

He called me his love. Her heart skipped a beat. But she needed to calm down and get him to talk about what had happened all those years ago. Here goes… she thought.

“Ryan, we have to discuss what happened with your wife. I know part of the story, but you need to talk about it. You need to get it all out, the bitterness, the anger, the grief. Just one last time, you need to talk about it, to me. Then I will believe that you are truly ready to move on. Please do this for us and for our future.” She pleaded with her eyes as she went on, “We have a long way to go from here, and that is the first step. We may have fallen in love at first sight, but we have to do this the right way if it’s going to last forever. And I do want us to last forever. But I think maybe we need to slow down, take things one step at a time. We need to talk about the past as well as the future. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?”

“Yes, I think I do. And you are probably right, although talking about her is the last thing I want to do right now. I hate to ruin a wonderful evening.”

“This will be the last time I ask you to talk about it. There will be no need to after tonight,” she answered with an encouraging smile.

“All right, I don’t even know where to begin.” He continued holding her hand while he spoke.

She caressed the back of his hand with her thumb to reassure him.

“You already know most of the story. Marnie and I were the ideal up and coming young couple. I owned a business and she had a good job and we lived in a nice home in Carmel, Indiana. Ten years ago, we’d been married about five years, she had gone on a business trip with her boss, Joe. It wasn’t an uncommon thing for her to do. They were on their way home. They had driven instead of flying because he had some fancy new car he wanted to try out. But it was raining very hard that night. Joe lost control of the car and they hit another car head on. Joe was killed instantly and Marnie lived long enough for me to get to the hospital, but she never regained consciousness. I drove there like a madman trying to get to her. I stood by her hospital bed crying, pouring my heart out to her, pleading with her not to die, not to leave me. She passed away shortly after I arrived. I was devastated. I took her belongings home with me and didn’t look at them until the next morning. That’s when I found the divorce papers that she had already signed. I also found what appeared to be a very impressive engagement ring and some other disturbing items in her purse. I did some investigating and found out that she and Joe had been carrying on behind my back for at least two years. Everyone in their office had known, but I had no idea. I was a blind fool. Or maybe I really didn’t care enough to notice what she was or wasn’t doing. I really don’t know. Anyway, I got through the funeral, trying to act like the dutiful, mourning husband, and then I sold my business, sold our house and packed up my belongings. Shane and Chloe had just opened the restaurant and they asked me to come out and help them with it.”

“Oh, Ryan, I am so sorry you had to go through all that. It’s no wonder you were sour on women for all these years. But rest assured, we are not all like Marnie.”

“Yes, Chloe keeps telling me that. She never did like Marnie, you know. She knew from the first time she met her. But she certainly likes you. You have not only made quite an impression on me, but with Shane and Chloe too. You should be honored.” He kissed her hand again. “Chloe has wanted me to find someone like you for a long time now.”

Katy shivered. If kissing my hand has this much effect on me, what would I do if he actually kissed me? I can’t wait to find out. Ten years was a long time to go without the love of a man.

“There is one thing I regret about the whole thing, though,” Ryan added sadly.

“What’s that?” she asked curiously.

“The people in the other car, it was a man and his little girl. The little girl was about ten or so, I think. I was told she was wearing a Girl Scout uniform. I always felt like I needed to contact his widow to apologize for Marnie and Joe taking her husband and little girl away from her. But I never could bring myself to do it. She lost so much, because of Marnie and Joe, so much more than I had lost that night on that Chicago highway. I even got her name, it was Kathleen or Katherine or something. I can’t remember the last name now. It’s been too many years. I always felt guilty about not apologizing to her and sending my condolences, but I honestly just didn’t know how she would handle it. Of course, it is way too late now. The tenth anniversary of the accident was last week. I’m sure she has moved on by this time.”

Oh, my God. Katy was as white as a sheet. She could not breathe – she felt as if she were suffocating. How can this be? Even when she had heard about his wife’s accident and the fact that it had been ten years ago, it never dawned on her that his wife was in the car that had hit Bill and Bree that night. But she should have guessed. It was a rainy night on a Chicago highway and they had been hit head on.

What in the world would Ryan think if he knew that she was the Kathryn that he had wanted to apologize to? What would he do if he knew that after all these years, he had just done what he wanted to do then? Darling, Ryan, you have no reason to apologize to me. You didn’t do anything wrong. It was not your fault. Yes, she was stunned by the news, but she had moved on. She would always love Bill. And she would never get over losing her baby girl, but it was not Ryan’s fault. And she truly felt now that it was some form of destiny that brought the two of them together this week, ten years after the accident. Their meeting was meant to be, but not for the reasons they had thought. Katy honestly did not know what to say to him.

“Katy, are you all right? You look pale.” Ryan seemed concerned. His hand brushed her cheek.

“I am all right, Ryan. Talking about these things just makes me sad.”

“Do you want to talk about your husband?” Ryan urged her gently.

“Not really, Ryan. I came to terms with his death many years ago. We had a wonderful life together. It came to an end much sooner than I expected it to. I spent a lot of time at first grieving, but I had a son to raise. I’m ready to move on. I will always love him. He was my first love. But that doesn’t mean that I can’t love again.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that. And I’m glad we had this talk. What do you say we get out of here? It’s getting late and all this talking about unpleasant things has taken a toll on both of us, I am afraid. You look a little tired. I need to get you back to the hotel. After a good night’s sleep, we can get together and discuss more pleasant things. Like the rest of our busy, happy lives…together…”

Katy smiled wanly. I thought I wanted a life with this man. But how could she ever tell him about Bill and Bree? She would have to think this over. She needed the ‘Fab Four’ to help her through this one.

She allowed Ryan to link her arm in his as he walked her to his car, her thoughts racing, her stomach tied in knots. It had been a jolt, learning the details of the accident.

As they reached the car, Ryan leaned over and lightly brushed a kiss across her cheek. “Forever,” he said. “The confirmed bachelor and the yellow rose who turned his head and opened his heart in a matter of two days.” He leaned down and kissed her lightly on the tip of her nose before opening the car door and settling her in the front seat.

Katy thought her heart would burst. His words should be music to my ears. The chemistry between them was undeniable. If only there was not the nagging little secret of her identity standing between them. I have to figure out a way to tell him who I am. I have to figure out where we go from here. Is there a future for us? Or were we only supposed to meet for closure’s sake? He would never believe that she could love him if he knew the truth. He felt too much unnecessary guilt. Why does it have to be this complicated?

She was quiet all the way back to the hotel. Ryan reached across the seat and took her delicate hand in his. He looked over at her several times, thinking how pretty she was. And soon she would be his, in every way. He liked the sound of that.

But right now she was too quiet. I hope I didn’t upset her by discussing Marnie and the accident. She never said how her husband had died. But she was right about one thing. He did feel much better now that he had talked about it. He felt like he was ready to move on with her and put his past to rest, once and for all.

When they reached her hotel, Ryan parked the car and turned to her. “Katy, I want to thank you for this evening. You have no idea how happy I am at this moment.”

“I had a wonderful time, too, Ryan.”

“This is a whole new beginning for both of us, my love.” Ryan leaned over and kissed her. He kissed her lightly at first, before the kiss grew more passionate. She responded willingly. Her stomach was churning, her heart was pounding, the warmth slowly spreading through her body again. Her senses were reeling and any type of coherent thought was gone. She was falling in love with this tall, dark, and handsome Irishman. Or was she? His kisses stirred forgotten feelings within and brought a flush to her cheeks.

He kissed her again and again she responded with a passion she did not know she possessed.

Ryan pulled away and with his words brought her back to reality. “I’d better walk you to the elevator, Katy. In my car in a hotel parking lot isn’t exactly the place for this.”

Embarrassed, she straightened her dress and agreed with him.

“But know this, my yellow rose. There’s plenty more where that came from, and when you’re ready, you’ll know how loved and cherished you are.”

Katy wished that could be true. There was nothing more she wanted in the world right now. But she knew deep in her heart that it might never happen.

He walked her to the elevator and bade her goodnight. He blew her a kiss as he walked away and mouthed, “I’ll call.”