** ** ** ** **
After a scorching shower, the tension in my body is somewhat dissipated but my emotions are still erratic. I’ve been here for almost three months and while I love it, I still have bad days. Some days I wake up happy, ready to face whatever comes my way and other days I struggle to make it through. I miss my mom. I miss her comforting hugs and right now I miss her advice. My feelings for Grayson frighten me and I have no clue how to deal with them. Or him. I’ve never felt such a conflicting desire for anyone before. I am irrevocably drawn to him, like a magnet, but I also have the inclination to run from him. I need to talk to someone. Maybe Demi? I feel like I can trust her which is another feeling I’m unfamiliar with.
I drop onto my couch, overcome with exhaustion, just as my phone starts ringing. It reads unknown number and I frown. I got a new number after my mom died and only a few people have it, all of which are here in Breckinridge. I made sure no one from my past had it before I left. I answer it with caution.
“Hello?”
I hear a sharp intake of breath on the other end but nothing else.
“Hello?” I ask again, doing nothing to hide my irritation.
“You answered,” the voice says. I know the voice is female but that’s where the recognition ends.
“Who is this?”
There’s a few seconds of silence. I think the call has been disconnected but then the voice says “It’s…It’s… Taylor.”
My heart stops and it’s as if the floor has fallen out from under me. The last person I ever wanted contact with again is my ex best friend from back home. She earned that title when I walked in on her having sex with my boyfriend.
I swallow the bile that starts making its way into my mouth and fight back my anger.
“How did you get my number?”
She hesitates before answering, “Does it matter?”
“Of course it matters! Why did you call me?” I ask harshly.
“Am I not allowed to know how you are? Or where you are?” She sounds hurt but I don’t care.
“No! You lost that privilege when you decided to screw Jake!” I snap.
“Huntley I’m –“ I cut her off. Her apology won’t mean anything.
“Cut the shit Taylor, why did you call me?”
“I wanted to tell you before you heard it from someone else,” she half whispers. My skin prickles and my body stiffens. I can feel the bile rising in my throat again.
When I don’t reply she continues, “I’m…I’m…pregnant,” she pauses, “And it’s Jake’s.”
My heart drops to the floor and it feels like it breaks every rib on the way down. I want to vomit. My body starts trembling and an audible sob escapes before I can stop it. I can’t believe it. She told me they stopped seeing each other after I caught them, not that it mattered to me. I was done with both of them the minute I walked into his bedroom.
I gather the bit of strength I have left, gripping my phone until I can feel the plastic cover cutting into my skin. “Don’t. Ever. Call. Me. Again. You. Whore!” I shriek.
“Huntley wait –“
“No!! Fuck you Taylor!! I hate you!! And Jake!!” I manage to yell through my sobs. I hear her jagged inhalation but don’t give her the chance to say anything more. “And Taylor, be careful he doesn’t push you down the stairs!!”
I end the call and collapse onto my carpet, my throat painfully raw from shouting. I feel broken all over again, like I’ve just walked in on them. The betrayal and pain comes flooding back, a relentless onslaught of memories I desperately wanted to forget. Taylor would no doubt be confused by my warning; she didn’t know what Jake was really capable of and I didn’t care to tell her. I would keep those dark secrets to myself.
Before I can think twice I call Demi. When she answers I sob hysterically, my words coming out in rushed, incoherent mumbles. I hear her say she’s on her way and disconnect. Somehow I manage to drag myself to my room, but crumple just short of the bed. I curl into a ball as sobs rattle my body and succumb to the pain and the inevitable darkness.
I pray that someone will make it stop, take it away. I can’t go through this again.
It hurts too damn much.
Chapter 9
Grayson