chapter Eleven
THE FIRST WEEK passed by before either one us knew what hit us.
It was much too easy getting into the routine of awakening early followed by a shower, breakfast with Laurina and Kerstan, followed by exploration around the area. We hadn’t bothered to go to Oslo yet but we planned to however the suburbs gave us plenty of opportunity to explore our curiosity.
I made my very first trip with Colin to the Systembolaget, Norway’s state-run alcohol stores which staffed all the hard alcohol, beer and wine that surpassed the proof limit to be sold in grocery stores and convenient supermarkets. It was definitely a revelation as we picked up another bottle of aquavit along with vodka and whiskey, vermouth and bitters.
He planned to make Manhattans for us that night and we needed to actually buy all the ingredients.
It was a Monday evening and hard to believe we’d already been away from Seattle for a week.
“Do you miss it?” I asked after we’d loaded the alcohol into the trunk of his grandparents’ Baltic blue Land Rover LR4.
“Miss what?” he wondered after we were seated and he started up the vehicle. It was a manual which meant driving for me was out until he promised to teach me how to drive a manual vehicle.
“The States, being gone from Seattle?”
“Not really. Not much to miss. My life had pretty much taken on a day-to-day routine that was starting to do my head in. Get up, go to the coffee shop, work my ass off and then head over to O’Shaughnessy’s and do what I had to do there. The more I think about my life in Seattle, the more I can see I was stuck in a rut.”
He paused as he stopped at a red light. “The problem is I was so desperate to have freedom to do what I wanted when ever I wanted, I didn’t really think about the consequences. Sure, life was passing me by and I was subsisting on too much booze, bar food and one night stands but it was still my life. The longer we are away, the more I realize I don’t want to live like that anymore and I thank you for forcing me to see the error of my ways.”
I stared at him with slight puzzlement. “Can I ask what I did exactly?”
“Giving me a reason to go on and do something with my life. Do you realize my grandparents’ have never met another significant other of mine? They never met ‘Carrie’ because I didn’t truly think we were right for one another so what was the use of them getting their hopes up and thinking I would give them grandchildren soon enough when I knew in my heart of hearts I would never marry her?”
He began to drive as the light turned green. “You are still the only woman who takes my very breath away by being in the same room with you. The connection we have is strong and palpable. Sometimes I think I am losing my mind, falling for you the way I have. It just doesn’t seem real at times, like I’m having a really great dream right before I am forced awake and I realize nothing in my life has changed except the latest conquest warming my bed. Then, I realize there is just something missing and I’ve blown my chance at perhaps having a satisfying relationship because I decided to take things too fast.
“I haven’t even made a pretense at getting to know this person and perhaps she could be a great girl. I was too busy allowing my hormones to overrule my heart and that is why I am always perpetually alone. It’s hard to have respect for someone who is willing to give you their body so easily. And it ruins all chances of you ever getting to know them because the ‘sex’ part got in the way.”
I turned to stare at him. “If it makes you feel any better, I’d like to take this…what ever that exists between us…slow. I like you and I am terribly attracted to you but I don’t want to be another conquest, Colin. One night stands have never been my thing and I want us to take the time to get to know each other. If that is all right with you then perhaps we can build a friendship based on mutual trust and take it from there.”
He remained silent as we drove and all I could think about was how I’d wished he filled that silence with words. I was one to talk. One night stands my ass. I’d had one with his brother before we left and I felt so guilty about it, just thinking of what I’d done brought color to my cheeks.
Perhaps because it hadn’t felt like a one night stand and I was so desperate at the time to be with someone and Liam fit the bill nicely. However, there was also that feeling there could never be anything permanent between us because he was my employer and I actually looked forward to starting my new job. I didn’t want to go back to my old life filled with school work and charities.
Although I loved volunteering, a part of me realized it was high time I grew up and realized I needed a life. An adult life filled with grown up responsibilities like going to work, paying taxes and yes, having a normal boyfriend, what ever that meant.
Colin was normal to a certain extent but like me, he’d also been stuck in the merry-go-round of arrested development. Like Peter Pan and Wendy, we didn’t want to grow up but stay in that youth-filled environment where responsibility eluded us and we could just mess around because we had enough disposable income real life didn’t seem to beckon us the way it would have had we not been born into wealth and privilege.
“I can do slow,” he finally said before he turned to look at me.
We were both sitting inside the car, parked in front of his grandparents’ house. “I look forward to taking it slow with you because I think you’re worth it. But I also have to believe this isn’t going to be some game. I want to know that if we do decide to take it slow, we have a real shot at a relationship when we get back to Seattle. I don’t want this to be some sort of…vacation romance that is expected to end just because we have gotten back to the real world filled with jobs and responsibilities. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“Yes, I do.” I stepped out of the sports utility vehicle at the same time he did and we both unloaded the bags from the trunk. “Listen, I don’t do vacation romances either so if we’re going to do this then it will be real for me. Just like it is for you too. No half-measures, no games, only what we decide to do and where to take what we have. If that’s fine with you of course.”
He walked toward the house with me side-by-side. “Are we negotiating?”
“Sort of although this isn’t a business agreement. It’s strictly personal and I am grateful and honored you have decided to introduce me to your grandparents’. I didn’t realize it was such a big deal but now that I know it is, I promise I’ll be on my best behavior.”
Colin winked at me. “Well, I can’t say the same for myself but I will do my very best to try to live up to your standards.”
“Oh my God. What standards?” I questioned out loud. “I’m not that hard to please, really!”
We both stopped walking at the same time and he cocked his head to the side. “Believe me, Ms. Bardot, you definitely have standards or you wouldn’t have been alone all this time. I know in a lot of ways, we are alike. In others, we’re different but know it was you who gave me the idea to start my own business and make something out of myself. Your standards are very high indeed but I don’t mind working towards them at all.”
“Spoken like a true gentleman.”
We walked inside and discovered his grandparents’ had gone off on one of their afternoon excursions into the woods. They kept active and spent a lot of time with one another. I hoped to be like them with the man I loved when I was their age. Relationships took time, work and energy but when you truly believed in someone, it made it all the more easier to do what ever it took to keep it going and alive.
I sat down at the table as Colin unpacked the alcohol and decided to make us lunch as we hadn’t eaten yet and it was shortly after two in the afternoon. I would have called my sister but it was still too early in the morning Pacific Standard Time, and I didn’t want to wake her.
“By the way, have you spoken to Liam?”
Colin brought our lunch to the table, open-faced sandwiches which consisted of brown goat cheese and smoked salmon. I dug in as I had quickly become quite a fan of smoked salmon though it had never been a favorite when I was in the States.
He then brought two lagers and poured them into glasses for each of us while coffee brewed. My main drinks of choice since we’d been here had been a lot of coffee and lager along with water. However, there wasn’t a wrong time to drink coffee so I was in heaven regardless.
“I spoke to him yesterday,” he said after he swigged from his lager. “He’s doing pretty good. The company is making money, he’s having fun and he finally persuaded Caitlyn to go out on a date with him.”
I almost choked on a piece of my sandwich. “I’m sorry? Did you say he asked Caitlyn out on a date? And she said yes?”
“Well, not at first. Apparently, he had to really turn on the charm but he said she was so sweet about it the first couple of times she turned him down before she said yes. He went all out and sent a dozen red roses to her desk at work and she called him back and said they should definitely go out to dinner because obviously, he knew how to treat a woman.”
I smirked though I knew it was completely immature. “Interesting. Have you seen him into someone like this before?”
“Not really but maybe he just thinks it’s time. He is in his thirties and perhaps he’s ready to finally take that step. As you’ve said on countless occasions, we’re not exactly twenty-two anymore.”
“Speaking of,” I began before I finished the first half of my open-faced smoked salmon and goat cheese sandwich, “we’re not exactly pushing up daisies either. How about we go into the city tonight and experience Oslo properly? Know of any clubs or happening bars where we can have a drink and relax? I feel like a married couple and as we haven’t actually had any real fun since we’ve been here, we can look at it as an educational experience.”
“I’m game,” Colin responded with a smile. “Let me do some research. I am sure we can find a place that will be perfectly suited for the both of us.”
COLIN, EVER THE gentleman, and always looking out for his own interests as well as my own, took me to a place appropriately called the Beer Palace which was conveniently located in the Aker Brygge section of downtown Oslo. We both decided to try what they had on tap and settled on a Norwegian lager that was actually quiet good.
Although they had outdoors seating, I assumed we would be more comfortable inside. The weather definitely wasn’t warm enough to enjoy our time out there until I almost forgot the reason why the outside beckoned for Colin.
“I could really use a ciggie. I have been extra good at my grandparents’ and I swear to God I am trying to quit but these withdrawals are doin’ my head in,” he explained.
I merely smiled in return. “I’m just glad I brought my sweater coat. Come on, we can sit outside.”
We walked to the patio and although I really thought it would be a place full of twenty-something slackers, the crowd was all very well-heeled, mostly businessmen and women who worked in the area and most had plenty of money. The place smelled like money. We were definitely in our element.
Colin had chosen to wear a pair of black slacks and a white silk shirt which complimented his naturally lean body while I had opted for a tight black cashmere sweater, a short red skirt, black tights and black knee-length four-inch boots I had gotten on sale at the Christian Louboutin boutique the last time I’d visited Vegas.
We certainly didn’t stand out and no one gave us a second look. Colin was tall and blond, like around fifty percent of the crowd and although I could not be mistaken for being an ethnic Norwegian, the place was a regular United Nations. There were people from all over the world enjoying a beer with friends and colleagues as they spoke animatedly, mostly in Norwegian.
We sat at a table and I sipped from my lager. It was strong but went down smoothly. I people watched as he pulled out a pack of Camel Crush and politely offered one to me. I knew I shouldn’t as I had done so well at quitting beforehand but as a former ex-smoker, the thought of sitting there and not indulging was too tempting so I took one and he immediately lit it for me.
He lit his own cigarette, inhaled and exhaled with ecstasy. “Oh, wow. That’s what I have been missing. Once we get back to Seattle, I’ll quit again but it’s just too tempting being here not to do it.”
“Yes, smoking does seem very European, doesn’t it?” I inquired before we both laughed and it came so easily to both of us. “So, how did you find this place anyway? I was expecting some ratty little dive with bad eighties music playing on the jukebox, surrounded by kids at university.”
“How do we ever find places? I Googled nightclubs in Oslo and this one seemed promising. Technically, it isn’t a nightclub but there are some pretty cool ones not far from here if you’re in the mood later. I thought this could be our first place to explore. We could have a couple of drinks, loosen up and then head to a nightclub.”
“Sounds good to me,” I said as I swigged from my lager and began to enjoy the nice buzz I was experiencing.
I wanted this to feel a bit weird awkward between us because two people who barely knew one another shouldn’t feel so comfortable with each other. The problem with this situation was we’d been sharing the same bed for the past week though neither one of us had tried anything sexual with one another.
Actually, the most intimate activity that had happened between us was a bit of cuddling and spooning but we’d both been clothed at the time. It was moments like that I felt like we were two inexperienced teenagers who didn’t know exactly where this would go but we liked being with one another so it was enough for the time being.
Now, here we were at an upscale beer bar sharing lagers and cigarettes. It felt so post-university, the thought actually made me laugh. I forgot the outrageous prices charged for a glass of lager was not something we had to worry about as we weren’t backpackers. We were both grown people who could most definitely afford this trip we had taken, including the side excursion to Norway, one of the most expensive countries in the world.
The prices didn’t even put a dent in our prospective budgets, and thus one lager turned into two which turned into three. The more we drank, the more festive we became and the louder we seemed to laugh.
There were so many silly moments that had happened since we’d been there in that week and Colin was great at recalling them before he’d have me in stitches as he would talk about said incident. We smoked too much and had way too much fun but I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else at that moment.
Colin had just returned from the bar with another set of lagers. We were working our way through their selection on tap and it proved as enjoyable as our witty conversation. I’d just swigged from my newest lager when a female voice inquired, “Colin, is that you?”
My smile disappeared and I turned in what seemed like slow motion to come face to face with a beautiful young woman. She was our age easily though she looked quite young. Her brilliant mocha skin glowed under the subdued lights and her eyes were bright. She was short, no more than five feet and a few inches give or take and no more than one hundred and ten pounds.
Her clothes were strictly designer label and everything from her makeup to her short pixie hair cut screamed money. She wore a pair of dark indigo boot cut jeans, a pale gray vicuna sweater that had a deep-V which emphasized her breasts and a pair of black five-inch booties with the prominent red-soled bottoms on display as she sat across from him and crossed slim legs.
“Clarissa, what are you doing here?” he wondered though his voice was a mixture of happiness, annoyance and curiosity.
“I live here now. You know after our whole…breakup…I kind of just felt lost. I left the States and traveled all over Western Europe. I actually met Ambros in Barcelona. We just clicked and when I found out he was from Norway, I never thought about maybe just ending what we had. By the time we realized what was happening, we agreed it would be easier for me to move here than him moving to the States.”
“I’m sorry, Ambros?”
Clarissa pointed out a tall, young Viking who walked towards us with two bottles of Aass Bock in his hands. He was lean yet he possessed a lot of hidden muscles and with his lightly tanned skin, golden blond hair and bright steel-blue eyes, he looked every bit the stereotypical Norwegian.
He pulled up a chair and joined us. I don’t know why I felt so nervous but I couldn’t help think there was a real history between Clarissa and Colin, and though it shouldn’t have bothered me at all, it did and I hated those feelings were starting to get to me.
“I’m sorry—my manners must have deserted me and for that, I apologize,” Colin began. “This is Deirdre. She is a very good friend of mine, and we are actually visiting my grandparents. They live in Oppegård and we have pretty much been chillin’ out there in the suburbs. This is our first night exploring the city properly. Deirdre, this is Clarissa.”
Clarissa rolled her eyes in a playful way. “You have always been so bad at introducing people, Colin. Nice to meet you, Deirdre,” she said as she held out her hand and I shook it warmly.
“Colin and I were first loves way back at university. He broke my heart and I was so distraught, I left the semester before I’d finished my degree. I traveled all around—France, Germany, the Netherlands, Belgium, Italy, and Spain. It was a complete and unexpected coincidence Ambros was also visiting Barcelona too. We fell for each other quickly and we have been married for four years.”
Colin choked on his lager. “That is great. So you’re no longer Clarissa Jones then?”
“Nope. Ambros, this is my ex, Colin, and his girlfriend, Deirdre. And I’m now Clarissa Evenstad.”
Oh boy, talk about awkward.
All this time Colin thought “Carrie”—real name, Clarissa Evenstad—was licking her wounds and still hadn’t gotten over him. Not only had she healed quite well but she was now married to a very sexy and handsome Norwegian. What were the odds we would have run into one another at all?
“Nice to meet you,” Ambros shook both our hands before he slipped an arm around Clarissa’s waist possessively. “I suppose I should thank you for dumping Clarissa. Otherwise we would have never met. I knew she was special from the moment we ran into one another and every day with her is like heaven.”
She smiled at her husband before she kissed his lips gently. “You are so wonderful and such a gentleman.” Clarissa turned toward us again. “Ambros works in this area so I try to get together a few times after work to see him and spend some quality time together. It isn’t easy to be a full-time mom and though I adore Henrik, he’s a lot of work.”
Major bombshell number two: not only was she married but they’d had a child together and looked blissfully happy with one another. I turned toward Colin but his face was completely impassive and I didn’t take this as a very good sign.
Soon, conversation began to segregate between the sexes and I spent my time talking to Clarissa while Colin seemed to have recovered somewhat and carried on a conversation with Ambros.
“So, if this is the first time you’re getting into the City, I assume you haven’t shopped yet?” Clarissa wondered with a smile on her face, her amber-brown eyes warm and gentle.
“Not yet. I didn’t bring many clothes either because I planned to shop here but we’ve been staying at the house Colin’s grandparents’ own and we haven’t really gotten around to visiting the City yet, not until tonight,” I responded after I swigged from my lager.
“I’ll give you my number. Henrik has a nanny and I can leave him with her. We could spend a girl day—manicures, pedicures, facials and then lots of shopping. Ambros makes so much money and he complains I don’t spend enough but the cost of living here is insane. It’s nothing like the States. It took time to get used to it but now I don’t want to ever leave. I just can’t see us having the same quality of life we’ve got here if we left and moved to the States,” she explained.
The more she spoke, the more I liked her and this was definitely a good thing. I thought she would be an uptight bitch but she was actually a very sweet person. I now knew what Colin meant when everyone thought they’d been the perfect couple and how let down everyone must have felt when the relationship ended.
It did feel a bit strange to be speaking to someone who had been intimate with a man I hadn’t slept with yet.
Although I didn’t think it was right, I suddenly felt jealous. Here was this beautiful, sophisticated woman sitting between two men she’d slept with and yet what was I? A frightened woman, not much younger than her, afraid of starting a relationship with Colin because of…what exactly?
A feeling of pure pleasure surged through my body and all the sudden, I wanted to share myself with this wonderful man who had great taste in women and lager and places to hang out. However, I couldn’t do anything with him, not in his grandparents’ house. It felt too perverse and inappropriate. It was then I formulated a plan in my head to get him to a hotel and then, only then, could we consummate what seemed like a tease between us for the past two weeks.
Everything in my body screamed it was too soon and I should have held out a little longer but we weren’t kids, we were adults. Relationships followed their own course and I was not about to play “The Rules” game. Even if I had decided it would be okay, we’d been on more than three dates, shared the same bed for a week and he had never touched me in any way that was considered inappropriate. What was I waiting for exactly? The only way I would erase the memories of said impropriety with Liam would be to consummate my relationship with Colin but could I do it and would I go through with it?
I was feeling no pain, and had more than my fair share to drink though I wasn’t shit-faced by any stretch of the imagination. We’d been at the bar for over three hours and it wasn’t like we’d pounded lager after lager without taking a breath. I was more than ready and I knew tonight would be the perfect night.
Besides, knowing how Colin was, he would never initiate anything sexual between us at this point. I’d told him I wanted to take it slow and two weeks wasn’t slow by any stretch of the imagination unless one took into consideration I’d spent the last two weeks sharing living space with the man in question.
Before Clarissa and Ambros left, we exchanged phone numbers and she told me she would call me the following afternoon so we could go shopping. We all said our goodbyes and shortly after they left, I turned toward Colin.
“Are you ready to leave?” I wondered out loud.
“Definitely…only, I don’t think it would be safe for me to drive. The drunk driving laws are a lot stricter here than they are in the States and I would hate for us to be stopped by the cops. What do you think we should do?” he inquired before he finished the rest of his lager.
I pulled out my Android and Googled the closest hotels to where we were and TripAdvisor recommended the Clarion Collection Hotel Folketeateret. It was actually the number one hotel recommended and I immediately called them and booked a room with a young woman with good English who snapped up my credit card details before I ended the call.
“We’re set. Let’s go. Where did we park the car?”
“I used one of those paid parking lots so we’ll just have to pay however much it will be for parking overnight.”
“Sounds good to me. We can get a taxi. Let’s go,” I said as I grabbed my sweater coat and slipped it on.
Colin grabbed me by the arm and whipped me around to face him. It wasn’t painful, just unexpected and sudden. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
His crystal blue eyes searched my face for indecision but I knew he wouldn’t find any.
I nodded my head, my own eyes never leaving his. “I’ve never been surer of anything in my life. Let’s get out of here.”
He slipped an arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. “Okay,” he merely said before we left the Beer Palace.