Callum gasped, winded. Jack’s face was inches from his and he was scared. He blinked rapidly, pushing at Jack to get him to back off. Jack drew back his fist and Callum squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for the impact. When it didn’t come, he opened them warily and Jack aimed his palm into the wall next to him instead, missing his head by a fraction of an inch.
Jack released him, stumbling away as Callum slid to the ground, gasping for air.
“I wanted to tell you,” he heaved, his throat burning. “I wanted Tom to tell you, but he wouldn’t.”
Jack turned to face him, skepticism written all over his face. “Bullshit!”
Callum shook his head, pain shooting up his neck. “It’s true! He said it wouldn’t do any good, it wouldn’t change anything.”
Jack huffed out a sarcastic laugh, still pacing up and down, shaking his hand out.
“Would you have come back if you’d known?” Callum demanded. “Honestly?”
Jack glared at him helplessly, then turned away.
“Come on – would you?”
“I don’t know,” Jack mumbled, standing with his back to him, inspecting his hand.
“Then don’t go blaming anybody.”
Callum pushed himself away from the house and stood up shakily. “You weren’t here, you didn’t know. That was three years ago and she’s still here and she’s doing fine. Well, she was, until you came back.”
Jack turned back to him, eyes narrowing dangerously. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying be careful. If you need some time to think about this, fine, take it, but make it quick.”
“Time to think about what?” Realisation dawned. “For Christ’s sake, I don’t need any time to think about anything!”
“You sure about that?”
“Am I pissed off that nobody told me about this? Damn straight. Does it hurt? More than you’ll ever know.” He shook his head, his voice catching in his throat. “But does it make me want to get the hell out of Dodge? No way. I’m here and I’m staying and I’m starting to wonder how many times I have to tell you people that before you get it!”
“You –“
“Yeah, I know – shitty track record! But if you thought this was gonna change things, you’re dead wrong.”
Callum fidgeted uncomfortably and Jack honed in.
“You did, didn’t you? You thought that once I knew about this, I’d take off again!”
Callum didn’t bother denying it.
“Why the hell did you give me that pep talk last night if you felt that way?” Jack demanded.
“Jesus, get over yourself!“ Callum exploded. “That wasn’t a pep talk! It’s not about you – none of this is about you! Don’t you see what you’re dealing with here? You can’t just pick and choose what you can and can’t handle! It’s a package deal – all or nothing, those are your options!”
Jack breathed heavily through his nose, his jaw clenched tight. The breeze gently rustled the leaves above them.
“You have to decide,” Callum continued, calming himself. “Because if you leave, what happens to her? What happens if there aren’t any more pieces to pick up? I don’t know who the hell you are anymore dude, but I know her, and I know she deserves a hell of a lot better than this. I can’t just walk away and leave you to it, hoping like hell that you’re gonna do the right thing by her. She’s – we’ve – been through too much for that and the truth of it is, I just plain don’t trust you.”
“I know that, that’s why I’m here, busting my ass to try and prove to you that you can!” Jack insisted. “And I don’t expect you to walk away, either. She needs you, even I can see that.”
Callum shook his head, his cheeks burning. Strangely, hearing Jack say it did nothing to comfort him. He didn’t want Ally to need him. He wanted her to want him. Even as the thought crossed his mind, he knew it was impossible – now, more than ever.
The back door opened, breaking the spell, and Maggie stood in the doorway.
“Ally’s freshening up, she’ll be out in a minute. I made coffee for anyone who wants it,” she said uncertainly, her gaze flitting between them before finally settling on Jack. “You staying or going?”
Jack drew himself up straighter. “Staying.”
Ally sat on the side of her bed, sniffing and wiping her eyes, trying desperately to pull herself together. Humiliation and regret clawed at her and she wanted nothing more than to lie back, pull the covers up over her head and stay there forever.
She had been determined to make sure that Jack would only get to see her at her best – strong, in control, healed. She hadn’t counted on him getting through her defenses so easily. Now that wall was crumbling so fast, she couldn’t keep up the repair work.
Shame crept through every cell in her body as she had relived her suicide attempt, Jack staring back at her as if he was reliving it with her. She would have done anything to spare him from that. It was bad enough that everyone else knew – the one thing she had hoped to keep from him, the one thing that she was ashamed of more than anything else, and now he knew the ugly truth.