“Dave.” He greeted him formally, offering his hand. They had never been particularly close and he was wary now. It couldn’t hurt to be polite. “It’s been a long time.”
Dave reached out to shake it. “Sorry to hear about your Dad.”
“Thanks.”
With a nod of his head, Dave indicated the booth where Ally sat. “Never thought I’d see the day you two were back in here, together. Almost like old times huh?”
Jack nodded, uncomfortable with the comparison. “I guess so.”
“So, what the hell happened to you? We thought you were dead, you just dropped off the face of the earth.”
Jack smiled tightly. Polite conversation was one thing, but the answers to questions like this weren’t something he could just whip out of thin air in the middle of a crowded bar. “Yeah. I guess it might’ve seemed that way.”
He kept an eye on the bar behind him, searching for an excuse to order their drinks and escape the scrutiny.
“It did seem that way,” Dave insisted, his gaze leveling uncomfortably on him. “I can’t believe she’s even giving you the time of day after you disappeared like that. If it were me, I sure as hell wouldn’t.”
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but none of this is any of your business, is it?” Jack silently dared him to say more. He pushed his wallet back into his pocket, preparing to defend himself physically, if it came to that.
“Dave!” Harry barked from behind the bar. “Back off. I don’t want any trouble in here tonight – I’m getting too old for this shit. Jack, what are you having?”
“Beer,” Jack answered, never taking his eyes off Dave. “Two.”
Dave glanced back at Harry, stony-faced. “Fair enough. I’m not looking for any trouble. Just had to say my two cents worth.”
“Well, you’ve said it. Now go bother someone else,” Harry grumbled, pulling out two beers and popping the tops off them as he shot Dave a withering frown.
“I’m only saying what everyone else is thinking,” Dave insisted.
Jack kept an eye on him as he dug into his pocket again and withdrew his wallet, trying desperately to stop his hands from trembling. Adrenaline coursed through his system as he handed cash over the bar and took the bottles from Harry.
“Thanks,” he mumbled.
Harry leaned over the bar and pushed the cash back in Jack’s direction. “Put your money away, first beer’s on the house. Callum told me what you did to McLeish. Welcome home.”
Jack nodded, bewildered. He indicated the beers as he slipped the cash back into his pocket. “Thanks.”
Harry moved on to take the next order and Jack turned to find Dave had vanished. Making his way back through the crowd to Ally, he set the beers down on the table between them.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“I’m fine. Why?”
“I saw you talking to Dave.”
He took a sip of beer and tried to shrug off the whole experience. “He was telling me how sorry he was to hear about Dad.”
“Was that all?” she asked. “I saw your face. It didn’t look like he was just passing on his condolences.”
Jack smiled tightly. “You know Dave. He never knows when to keep his mouth shut.”
Ally looked down at the beer bottle in front of her and dragged it closer, picking at the label absentmindedly.
“Hey,” he leaned forward. “It’s fine – don’t worry. I won’t self-combust if someone looks at me sideways.”
She glanced up, concern furrowing her brow as her eyes flitted over the healing cuts and bruises on his face. “It’s not the fact that they’re looking at you sideways that bothers me.”
He shrugged casually, trying to set her mind at ease.
“You’re acting like you’re not surprised by any of this,” she said.
“I’m not. Why would I be? I’m the villain here. I deserve it.”
“I wish you wouldn’t say that.”
“Say what?”
“You’re not a villain, you’re a human being. You made a mistake, that’s all. You’re not the only one who’s ever made a mistake. The important thing is that you’re here now, and you’re trying to make up for it. What you deserve is a break – from Dave, from Callum, and from yourself.”
He gripped the beer bottle in his hand so tightly, he thought he might crush it.
“Point taken,” he said, taking a quick sip to hide his discomfort.
He stared out over the crowded bar. Did she have any idea what she was asking him to do? She made it sound easy, like forgiving himself was just a check-box on a shopping list. Make a mistake: check. Get over it: check.
Ally placed her hand over his. “Stop beating yourself up,” she said, loud enough that he could hear above the noise. “Everyone makes mistakes. The key is learning what not to do next time, then moving on. You can’t wallow. It’ll kill you – trust me, I know.”
“I wish it was that simple,” he said, before he had time to engage his brain.
“It is. You just have to try harder.”
She released his hand and picked up her beer as a million questions raced around inside his head.
“A toast,” she said, raising her bottle before he could ask any of them. “To Tom.”