Chapter Nineteen
He was a fool; an idiot, actually. Any red-blooded male would have taken one look at her and wept with pure joy. Instead he just felt like weeping. Who was he to take something so perfect and make it his?
He waited anxiously in the chair by the fireplace then heard a soft knock on his door.
“Come in,” he said authoritatively. If he didn’t get a handle on himself, he was done for.
He heard Sara approach him but thankfully his back was to her. He got up from his chair and turned around. If he wasn’t already a Christian, he would have gotten on his knees and confessed everything. Surely she was the reason for his existence; surely there was a God.
She was dressed in the thinnest night rail known to mankind. He couldn’t decide if it was covering her or not. The material wasn’t exactly see-through, but the silk clung to every curve of her body, making his mouth gape open in awe.
She smiled. “Wedding present from Lady Fenton.”
Nicholas made a mental note to thank Lady Fenton the next day…repeatedly.
He gave himself another boost of confidence and offered her some wine. “You look absolutely ravishing in that Sara.”
She lifted one single eyebrow and took a sip of wine. She mocked him? That little witch! He wanted to laugh and yell all at the same time. She was toying with him! And worst of all he was falling for it like some schoolboy who had never seen a woman before. Suddenly he felt a lot more confident. He licked his lips and walked toward her. “I have another surprise for you.”
She lifted her eyebrows in a quizzical way and he saw the doubt in her eyes. How she hated his surprises. It made him want to laugh and point, both of which were not romantic.
“Close your eyes,” he ordered.
She did as he said and waited. He grabbed one of his untied cravats, and firmly attached it around her head, rendering her blind. “Can you see anything?” he teased, inches from her mouth.
She bit her pink lip and sighed. “No.”
He breathed over her mouth, “Perfect, now it’s time to eat.”
She shifted uncomfortably on her feet. “You’re joking, right?”
“I never joke.” If he could see her eyes he would imagine them rolling right about now. “I’ll lead you to your seat. We’re going to play a little game. How does that sound?”
She smiled and with sudden eagerness leaned forward, dangerously close to his face. “I like games.”
God must favor him above all men. He sent up a silent prayer and arranged the dishes on the table. “You get to taste each treat, but in order to get the next treat you have to name the one you’re tasting.”
“Sounds easy enough.”
“Hardly,” he said dryly. He lifted a strawberry to her lips. “What is this?” he asked, leaning in.
She laughed. “That’s easy; it’s a strawberry.”
“Very good,” he praised. “The next one is a bit harder. He lifted a piece of chocolate to her mouth and watched as she licked her lips around it.”
“Chocolate?” She licked her lips, driving him crazy.
“I knew you’d be good at this game,” he laughed. “Now this is going to be a little bit harder for you.” He lifted up a small cake to her mouth and watched her bite in. He had never been more envious of cake in his life. Crumbs went everywhere as she wiped her mouth clean with her tongue.
“Hmm, this one tastes like a fairy cake?”
“You, my darling, know your foods very well. Bravo. Now for the main event! This should be your favorite treat; in fact, I hope it will be. Lean in very closely.” He watched as she leaned her entire body over the table. He nearly swore as her gown continued to cling to her curves. “A little further.” Finally, she was as close to him as he needed. “Now tell me what this is.” He leaned in carefully and ran his tongue over her lips. They tasted of sugar and chocolate and of actual perfection. He kissed her fervently, allowing his tongue to slip into her mouth ever so gently.
“Do you have your guess?”
She laughed huskily. “I do believe that was Nicholas Renwick.”
“Which is your favorite?” he teased.
“I need another taste,” she whispered.
“Of course,” he answered, then pulled her around the table into his arms. It didn’t take long for him to tear off the outer robe of her night rail. In his haste, he forgot to take off her blindfold. He quickly removed it and gazed into her beautiful eyes. “You’re beautiful,” he proclaimed in a ragged breath.
“As are you,” she answered, pulling off his coat and un-tucking his shirt. How had he, Nicholas Renwick, managed to marry such a beautiful and willing wife? He laughed and he threw her onto his massive bed.
“I do believe,” he said in between kisses, “that I have half a mind to make you my wife right about now.”
Sara pulled his body over hers and kissed him passionately. “Took you long enough.”
And then Nicholas laughed, releasing all of the anxiety he felt earlier in the day. Of course being with Sara would be like this. A night filled with games, laughter, and passion. He only wished he could offer her his love. In the back of his mind he could almost hear a voice telling him that it was fine to let his guard down, to love this woman completely. If only it were that easy. The same voice telling him to give his heart away was the exact same voice that also reminded him of what happened the last time he gave his heart away.
Not only were bad choices made, but he ruined a marriage, all because of his passions. It wasn’t truly possible for him to give a part of himself to someone when those parts were still wallowing in guilt from the first round of love.
He kissed down the nape of her neck. He heard her moan and immediately responded by removing any obstacles of clothing in the way. He wanted her like he’d never wanted anyone in his life, but he felt he needed to warn her. “Sara, this may be…“
“I’m not stupid,” she supplied. “I know.”
And that was all Nicholas needed. He spent the rest of the night teaching Sara what it was really like to be one with someone. It wasn’t until early in the morning, with Sara's body sprawled across him, that he realized the repercussions of his actions. If she annulled this marriage he wouldn’t be able to go on. He had forgotten the sweet ecstasy of sharing one’s body with another. And what if she were to bear him a child? What would he do? He prayed for God to show him mercy and at least help him to sleep while the questions still loomed in his mind.
Sara woke up refreshed, energized, and should she admit happy? The night before had surpassed even her wildest imaginations. Nicholas had taken his time with her, although she knew how difficult it had been for him. He was after her pleasure before his own; she wanted to return the favor but upon waking found him nowhere to be found. They were supposed to attend one of the balls tonight and then embark on their honeymoon, although she wasn’t sure if she really cared that they went anywhere. She was more excited to be with Nicholas. She moved out of the bed carefully examining her body. True she felt a little uncomfortable but that was to be expected. She put on the robe hanging by the chair and looked out on the balcony.
It was then that she heard a gentle knock and Nicholas strode in.
He was fully clothed and looking as beautiful as ever, it took everything in her not to throw off her robe and jump on him. She was embarrassed at the thought.
He smiled knowingly as if he, too, was thinking the same thing. He walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek. “And how did you sleep?”
“Gloriously, except there was this odd noise coming from your mouth. Could it have been snoring? I’m sure you are exhausted after so much work last night. Really, I should take it easy on you; after all, you are much older.” She winked and walked by him.
He grabbed her arm and pulled her body into his own, pressing his hot lips against hers. He moaned as his hand cupped her breast. “Little minx,” he said against her lips, and then her robe was off as if it hadn’t been on or secure in the first place. She giggled as he pushed her up against the wall and began kissing down her back and arms, molding his body to hers.
He groaned as she pulled his hair and then whispered against her skin yet again, “I don’t think we’re going anywhere today.”
She laughed. “What about the ball tonight?”
He looked like he was going to swear; instead he shrugged his shoulders. “We’ll be late.”
She laughed watching his clothing hit the floor. It wasn’t until late afternoon that they actually ate and were able to bathe and dress for the evening, and even that seemed to be a chore and quite distracting.
Finally, Sara was ready. Since she was married, she was able to wear darker more vibrant colors. It was so much better than prancing around in pastels and whites. She swished her dress a few more times before Nicholas entered the room.
He walked up from behind and hugged her. “Are you sure you want to go to the ball tonight?” he purred into her ear.
“It would be rude not to,” she answered half-heartedly.
“That dress shouldn’t be allowed.” He sighed twirling her around in front of him “I feel like I’m slowly being tortured. I can only see parts of you when I went to see all of you.”
Blushing she swatted him with her hand. “You really are a rogue aren’t you?” she teased.
He merely lifted his hands in defense as if to say, “I warned you.”
She gave him a pointed look before he finally rolled his eyes, “Fine, we’ll go but the minute I see another man touch part of you that isn’t to be touched, we’re leaving.”
She arched an eyebrow. “Really Nicholas, I can’t see that happening.”
“Then you obviously don’t see yourself clearly do you?” His tone was serious, sucking away the teasing that was once alive within the room. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “You are beautiful. Just try not to smile at too many young gentleman. As you pointed out this morning, I am old and don’t like punching gentlemen in the face.”
She giggled and took his arm. “I promise.”
She would never say it to Nicholas or even admit it out loud, but she felt positively plain standing next to her husband. He was so devilishly handsome that it seemed unreal. His piercing blue eyes did nothing to set her nerves to ease. She smiled up at him as he led her to the waiting carriage.
Marriage to him would be perfect.