“Shit. Yeah. Man, I do not envy you.”
“The thing with the money, with him paying for a lawyer or something, it…” I hesitated. “Look, there’s a little more to this, and there’s no way I can explain it without getting into a little bit of TMI.”
Teagan’s eyebrows climbed her forehead. “Am I going to need therapy after this?”
“Probably.”
“Great. Go on.”
I laughed a little, but it took a hell of a lot of effort. “The thing is, we… The reason we click is that we’re both…” I cringed. “We’re both kinky.”
Teagan blinked a few times. “Kinky? Like, whips and chains?”
“Kind of. Head games more than anything. Dominance.”
She leaned closer, lowering her voice to a whisper. “Rick Pierce is a dominant? Seriously? Seriously?”
“No.” I swallowed. “I am.”
She straightened. “Oh really?”
I nodded. “So we—”
“No, no. Hold on.” She put up a hand and closed her eyes. “Just…give me…”
“Teagan?”
She waved her hand to silence me. After a few seconds, she shivered and opened her eyes. “Sorry. Just needed a minute to imagine him like that.”
“You weren’t imagining me, were you?”
She frowned. “Thank you for ruining my little fantasy, dickwad.”
I chuckled halfheartedly.
“Anyway. Sorry.” She leaned closer, resting her folded arms on the table. “Go on.”
I searched her eyes, and she was definitely serious now. Though I had to admit, I did appreciate the momentary break in tension; any excuse to catch my breath. “So, an enormous part of my sex life—especially with Rick—is telling submissives what to do.”
“Right. Being dominant.”
I nodded. “But after the firm gave me this ultimatum, I feel like the minute I go to do anything with Rick, suddenly I’m the one taking orders. And it just kind of…kills it for me. I still want him like you wouldn’t believe, but whenever I even think of doing, well, the things we’ve done from the start—”
“So basically, you have to keep fucking him, but you can’t enjoy it.”
“Exactly. And going back to the possibility of a lawyer…” I rubbed my temples and exhaled sharply. “In all seriousness, money can fuck up a relationship. That kind of money? Asking him to pay for a lawsuit against a company he’s tied in with like this? And on top of that, the kick in the balls of having to admit to my submissive that I’m fucking helpless?”
“You’re not helpless, Jon.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I do, and…” She ran a hand through her ink-black hair. “Man, I have no idea what to tell you.” She paused. “You’re not going to tell Rick, are you?”
My stomach plummeted at the thought of him finding out. “Oh no. Absolutely not.”
She gnawed her lip. “I can’t decide if that’s good or bad. I mean, on one hand, you want to be honest with the guy. On the other…”
“Yeah.” I rubbed the bridge of my nose. “Fuck. If we were just wrapping up a project or two with his company, I might be able to suck it up for a little while. We’re looking at years of Mitchell & Forsyth and Horizon Developing working together, though.” I dropped my hand and sat up a bit, stretching my back as all the muscles tried to knot up at once. “And the thing is, I’ve seen how court cases can play out. Even if the law’s on my side, the judicial system might not be. Just the process of taking them to court could bankrupt me. That’s part of why my ex-wife is living with me. Her asshole ex did everything he could to drag it all out until she’d lost almost everything.”
“Unless you find someone who’ll do it pro bono.”
“There’s that.” I rested my elbow on the table and chewed my thumbnail. “Even then, I could lose. This could drag out for months, and I’ll be fucked for a job during that time.”
“Which isn’t good when your prospects are already sketchy.”
“Exactly. The good ol’ boys talk, and I might be a bit hard-pressed to find another firm in this town that’ll hire a modeler who’s creeping up on fifty and just sued another firm because of a situation involving him having sex with a high-powered client.” Jesus. Just thinking about all this was exhausting. “So yeah, I could take the firm to court and get them in the balls, but what will happen to me? And everyone else who works with us?”
Teagan nodded. “Yeah, I hear ya. There’s no easy solution, that’s for sure.” With a cautious grin, she added, “Kind of ironic that a firm run by homophobes is making one of their employees sleep with a client. Who’s fucking who up the ass, you know?”
I laughed, though it took some work. “Anyone ever tell you what a classy fucking broad you are?”
“Nope.” She sipped her drink. “And I don’t imagine you’re going to start, are you?”
“Not in this lifetime.”
“That’s what I thought.”
I scrubbed both hands over my face, and then let them drop into my lap. “So, I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“I wish I had some advice for you.”
“It’s okay. Just having someone to talk to helps.”
“You know I’m here any time you need it.”