Wish You Were Here

Chapter 30



Alice still had a key to the family home but had never used it because she knew it would upset Stella who thought of the old place as her own home now. But, as the bus dropped her at the end of the road, she knew the time had come to have a good look around.

Out of politeness, she rang the doorbell and breathed a sigh of relief when there was no answer. It felt funny to enter the house without Stella there and, for a moment, she could almost imagine that the clock had spun backwards and that she was coming home from school.

How long ago it had been when Alice had last felt the warmth of a family. It had all started to unravel as far back as when Alice had been twelve. That’s when their mother had died from cancer and Stella had started to sink into her selfish ways. Their father hadn’t known how to cope with her and so had indulged her every whim and Stella had grown up thoroughly spoilt. And Alice? What had become of that twelve-year-old girl? She looked in the hallway mirror and her pale face stared back at her. She’d battled on, hadn’t she? Passing all her exams and then taking a job she didn’t like and moving to a place she couldn’t really afford. Then there’d been the trauma of moving her father into the home three years ago. Life had thrown more than its share of hardship her way but she’d never given up.

‘And I’m not giving up now,’ she said to herself as she walked down the hallway into the kitchen. She looked around in horror at the empty takeaway trays on the draining board and the pizza box which had been dropped on the floor. Was that the reason Stella wanted a kitchen extension, Alice wondered – so she would have room to make even more mess?

She looked around, deliberating where she was going to start. Where would her sister keep important papers? In the dresser? That would be pretty organised for her but it was a good place to start so she opened the two large drawers but could see there was nothing in there but takeaway menus and taxicab cards and a brand new mobile phone that didn’t look as if it had ever been used. Alice closed the drawer.

She walked through to the front room and tried the side cupboard but that only had their mother’s beloved collection of crystal glasses which their father had always forbidden them to use. At least Stella was respecting that particular wish.

She looked around the room, noticing a brand new laptop in cherry red sitting on the coffee table and an expensive-looking cashmere jumper flung carelessly across a chair. Alice stroked the soft grape-coloured fabric and hoped that Stella had found it in a charity shop but knew that she’d probably bought it full price from a boutique on one of her trips into London.

She moved through to the hallway and climbed the stairs to the bedrooms. Stella’s was easy to spot. It looked like a clothes shop explosion. There were jumpers, jackets and dresses strewn across the bed as well as the carpet. No surface was left bare. There were heaps of tangled jewellery – gold and silver chains unashamedly knotted together and brooches clambering over bangles. A whole city of glass perfume bottles jostled for space on the dressing table and glittering photo frames punctuated the gaps. Alice peered closely and saw that each perfect frame contained an image of Stella.

She opened the top drawer but soon discovered that it was full of underwear – expensive lacy underwear. The next drawer was filled with more jumpers – each so soft to the touch that Alice surmised that they must have been cashmere like the one downstairs. She frowned. How on earth was Stella paying for all these things when she refused to get a job? It was a question which Alice wasn’t sure she wanted answering.

She opened the third and final drawer. It was a jumble of tights and stockings and it was clear that there wasn’t anything paper-related to be found there.

As she stood back up to full height, something caught her eye. There was a little bedside table on which sat a pile of fashion magazines and Alice noticed a cardboard folder underneath. She crossed the room and picked it up, opening it to see what was housed inside and then she groaned.

She’d found what she thought she was looking for. It was a will. Not the kind of will drawn up by an expensive solicitor but one of those you can print from the internet and Alice was pretty sure that it wouldn’t stand up in court.

She recognised her father’s shaky signature at the bottom. So this is what he’d been so worried about. What exactly had he thought he’d signed away? Alice studied the document. Stella hadn’t even bothered detailing anything – she’d obviously just been intent on getting their father’s signature on it but Alice could well imagine what she was thinking of and she didn’t believe that her own name would appear anywhere on the document.

It was then that she heard the front door open. Her sister was back. Quickly, she left the bedroom with the will in her hand and walked down the stairs, her heart thumping in her chest. She had no idea what she was going to say and wished that she was anywhere but there.

‘ALICE!’ Stella screamed as she saw her sister, her hand dramatically flying to her chest. ‘You gave me such a shock!’

Alice stared at her for a moment, not sure where to begin.

‘What are you doing here?’ Stella continued.

‘I’m trying to find out what you’re doing!’ Alice replied, her voice rising just a little.

‘What do you mean?’ she asked, dropping her car keys on the hall table. Alice held out the will and saw her sister turn pale. ‘Have you been going through my things?’

‘Of course I’ve been going through your things. How do you think I found this?’

‘But this is my home!’ she said. ‘You’ve got no right to do that!’

‘No, Stella – this is our father’s home,’ Alice said, following her into the living room. ‘He’s not dead yet!’

Stella had the good grace to look shamefaced for a moment. ‘But—’

‘He’s written his will,’ Alice told her. ‘He wrote it years ago when he knew he was sliding into dementia.’

‘But that’s not fair!’ Stella protested. ‘That’s before everything happened.’

‘What are you talking about? Before what happened?’

Stella’s eyes filled with tears but she didn’t answer right away.

‘Stella – what’s going on?’

Stella sank onto the sofa but Alice remained standing. ‘I’m in debt,’ Stella said at last.

Alice blinked but didn’t seem surprised. She sat down on the chair opposite her sister. ‘How much do you owe?’ she asked.

‘I don’t know,’ Stella said.

‘You must know! Is it a few hundred pounds? Or over a thousand? What?’ Alice asked, exasperation in her voice.

‘It’s more than that.’

‘How much more?’

Stella shrugged. ‘I’m not sure. About eleven thousand pounds.’

Alice’s eyes doubled in size.

‘Don’t look at me like that! You’re always judging me.’

‘I’m not always judging you,’ Alice said, trying desperately to remain calm. ‘I’m just trying to work out what’s going on.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘God, Stella! I know you’re not the world’s greatest mathematician but you must know that if you spend more than you earn then you’re going to end up in trouble. I mean, just look around you.’ She pointed to the cherry-red laptop and the cashmere clothes. ‘You haven’t got a job. You’ve made no effort to get a job and yet you’re spending money as if you’ve just won the lottery.’

‘But I’m entitled to nice things,’ she said.

‘You’re entitled to nothing – not unless you earn the money first,’ Alice explained. ‘I can’t afford to go out and buy myself brand new clothes and I’ve got a full-time job!’

‘But I like nice things.’

‘I know you do,’ Alice said. ‘You’ve been spoiled. Dad used to spoil you all the time. He was wrong to do that but he knew how upset you were when Mum died and it was the only thing he knew how to do. He used to spoil Mum too – remember?’

Stella shook her head and Alice remembered just how young Stella had been when their mother had died.

‘You look so much like her and I think Dad treated you a lot like Mum with all those gifts. I don’t suppose it’s your fault that you’ve grown so used to always having what you want but it has to stop. You’re not a child any more. You’ve got to grow up and take care of yourself.’

Stella looked shaken for a moment.

Alice sat forward, directing her gaze at her sister. ‘What did you think was going to happen? That you could get Dad to sign everything over to you? Did you really think he’d do that?’

‘I don’t know what I thought!’ Stella cried. ‘I just need the money.’

‘And what would happen if you did get it? You’d have it all spent in no time and then be broke again. This can’t go on, Stella!’

Stella looked down at the carpet and Alice couldn’t tell if she was taking everything on board or if she was planning on replacing the ancient carpet with a new Axminster at the earliest opportunity.

‘Do you know how worried Dad is about all this? He’s going out of his mind,’ Alice told her.

‘He’s already out of his mind,’ Stella said.

‘This isn’t a joke, Stella. This is just the sort of thing that could tip him over the edge. He’s weak and he needs to be kept calm.’

‘Don’t lecture me!’

‘I’m not lecturing you.’ Alice bit her lip and counted silently to ten. She needed to be calm. ‘Just promise me you’ll try and find work. Promise me you’ll curb all this spending.’ There was silence. ‘Nobody is going to bail you out of this mess but you – can’t you see that? Dad’s not always going to be around to pick up the bills and I don’t earn enough to look after myself half the time let alone a shopaholic sister. You’ve got to take care of this yourself, you see that, don’t you?’

Stella nodded slowly and looked up at Alice. ‘I’m sorry I’m always causing you so much trouble,’ she said in a tiny voice. It was the first time that Stella had ever apologised for anything in her life.

Alice got up from the chair and sat down next to her sister on the sofa, hugging her to her and kissing her cheek. ‘I’m afraid I don’t have eleven thousand pounds knocking about but I’ll help you where I can.’

‘You will?’

‘Of course I will.’

They sat like that for a moment longer and Alice couldn’t help wondering what life would be like if the two of them were like this all the time. She almost felt close to her in that rare moment of calm but then Stella’s mobile went and she sprang up to answer it.

‘Oh, Andy!’ she cried as if in relief. ‘No, of course I haven’t forgotten. Yes, I’ll be there later. Give me an hour, okay? I’ve got to get changed. Just wait until you see the dress I’ve got! See you, honey!’ She hung up.

‘Are you going out?’ Alice asked.

‘Yes. To that new club.’

Alice’s eyebrows shot up. ‘You won’t be spending any money there, will you?’

‘Of course not!’ Stella chimed. ‘Andy will be getting all the drinks in, I expect. I’ll only have to pay for a taxi home.’

Alice sighed. Had Stella been listening to her at all?

Alice’s answerphone was blinking when she got home and she realised that her mobile phone had gone flat.

She pressed play.

‘Alice? It’s Sam. You need to come in right away.’

That was it. That was all the message there was and she knew exactly what it meant.