Stages of Grace

Acceptance



the act of accepting

-Merriam Webster





Over that weekend, I try out my new suits. I’m nervous about working with Ryan. On Monday, I wake up early to get ready. Kate fusses over me at breakfast as though I’m a kindergartener getting onto the bus for the first time. She even packs me a lunch and checks to see if I remembered sunscreen. It’s nice, motherly. Something I have not felt in over two years.

Ryan pops his head in the front door. "Cinderella's chariot awaits!"

"Well, have her home before she turns into a pumpkin," Kate returns.

I grab my bag and travel coffee mug, double checking to make sure I have my sunglasses and hurry over to him.

"Is what I'm wearing okay?"

Ryan inspects me, starting with my gray cloth sneakers, raising his gaze to my black running shorts and company t-shirt he had dropped off over the weekend. He brings his eyes up to mine. "You'll do."

I smirk at him and roll my eyes.

"Hey, big scary boss man here. No eye rolling missy."

I bite my lips to keep from laughing and solemnly nod, my eyes dancing. I follow him out to his Jeep, turning to wave once more to Kate. As he drives, I sip my coffee, wondering what the day will bring. When we get to the business, Ryan has me hang out with him in the office area. There are small groups that have reservations to use jet skis to help. Ryan and I check them in and take their payments up front. Then every adult and adult guardian has to sign a waiver. Ryan shows me where to file the paperwork for each group. He also shows me how to schedule folks who call in to make reservations.

What strikes me as being funny is how similar it is to working the front desk at the doctor's office. I check people in, have them fill out paperwork, and accept payments. Ryan is impressed by how quickly I pick it up. Seeing that the office will not be a big deal for me, he asks if I want to go listen to one of the jet ski briefings. There's a lull in reservations, so once the next group is checked in, I walk with him down to the dock to listen to the safety points. Darrell, one of his other employees, is giving the briefing straight off of the dock, there is a large rectangle marked off with buoys. It's about the size of a football field. Darrell explains how that's the riding zone and how to keep the jet ski in idle when going to and from the dock.

He talks about the automatic kill key that is attached to a bracelet each rider will wear. If someone falls off the key being pulled will turn off the jet ski. Every rider needs to wear a life jacket, and he goes around to check that they're all on tightly. The dock has steps that lead down into the water. Darrell slowly walks down them, the first rider following him. Once he's set on the ski and headed to the ride zone, he gets the next rider set until they're all out.

He waves at Ryan, and climbing out of the water, walks over to meet me.

"Would you like to go out on one?" Ryan turns, asking me.

"Right now?" I gasp.

"Sure. Hey, Darrell. Tell Jennifer to watch the office. I'm going to take Grace out."

"Will do. It was nice meeting you, Grace."

Ryan pulls off his shirt and sets it on a bench that is built into the dock. When he sees I'm still standing there, he asks. "You're wearing a suit, right?"

"Oh, yes I am" I say, sitting down to take off my shoes, then shirt and shorts.

Ryan grabs a pair of life jackets.

"Would you like to ride with me?"

"Like behind you?"

His face breaks out in a giant grin. "Yeah."

My brows pull together. "You won't go too fast will you?"

"You'll be safe with me."

I gulp, feeling warm all over and watch him. He walks down the steps and over to a ski, tugging it back over to the dock. Once he's on, he holds out his hand to help me get on. I ease myself into position, deliberately moving my hands to the back of my seat. When Ryan turns it to idle, it bounces, causing me to jump and wrap my arms around his waist. There is still some space between us, so Ryan tugs on my legs to eliminate it. The life jacket stops just short of his waist so my arms are on his bare skin. I feel dizzy, sure that it's being this close to Ryan that's making my heart pound. As he makes his way over to the ride zone, I lean against him, my cheek on his shoulder blade.

"Hold tight," is all the warning he gives me once we enter the ride zone.

He isn’t going as fast as some of the other riders but fast enough that if he takes a sharp turn, I'd probably fall off. I tense my legs, pressing them tightly to Ryan's. He drops one hand down to my thigh and rests it there. He may mean the gesture to be calming, but it has the opposite effect. His hand seems to burn, and I'm certain he can hear my heart thumping wildly. When he moves his hand to steer, I feel the loss of its presence on my leg. He turns back to look at me in that moment. He sees how sad I look and stops the ski in the middle of the ride zone with skis still going wildly about us.

"Are you okay? Was I going too fast?"

The jet ski bounces up and down in the surf created by multiple wakes. "I'm fine." I turn my face away from his eyes. "You don’t need to stop. I like it"

"Are you sure?"

I tighten my arms around him, pressing my cheek to his shoulder blade again and nod. After a beat, we're off again. It’s thrilling, soaring over the water as I cling to him, feeling the heat of his skin against my cheek. I wonder if he ever takes anyone else out. The idea of another girl with him…I don’t even want to think about it. Ryan stops the ski and asks if I want to try driving it.

"Sure."

He turns, snakes his arm around my waist, and pulls me into his lap. I gasp, putting my hand on his thigh to steady myself. I am settled between his legs, my hand still on his thigh. My back is pressed up against his chest. His hands have not moved from my waist, and his face hovers over my shoulder. My face is turned towards him. If I move an inch I can kiss his cheek. If he turns to look at me, we will almost be nose to nose. He moves his hands to circle my waist as he removes the kill key from his wrist. He takes one of my hands, placed the kill key on it, and lifts my hand to the throttle to clip it back in.

He lifts my other hand from his leg and places both of them on the grips. My back arches as he leans over me, his hands still on mine. I close my eyes and try to catch my breath. It’s so hard to concentrate on what he is saying when he seems to be everywhere. The ski rocks us as he shows me how to start it and give it gas. He slowly has me turn the throttle, and I feel the engine jump to life beneath me. Ryan shows me how to steer then wraps his arms around my waist, resting his chin on my shoulder. I go much slower than he had and make a wide loop inside the ride area. After that, Ryan has me switch it to idle and we head back to the dock.

"Your hair smells heavenly," he whispers into my ear.

I shiver, making the jet ski jerk, and he chuckles behind me, running the tip of his nose up and down my earlobe. He sits back when we get closer to the dock. He jumps off first and then helps me, his hands resting on my waist a beat before taking my hand and leading me up the stairs.

"Did you like it?"

I grin. "I loved it."

We are off the stairs and he still has my hand in his. I see Darrell walking over to us. I tug my hand free. Ryan gives me a strange look and takes off his life jacket. I try to do the same but can't seem to get the last clip undone. Ryan pushes my hands away and undoes it for me.

"Was that your first time?" Darrell asks when he reaches us.

I flush and nod.

"So, did Ryan show you a good time?"

What was it with this guy and innuendo? Ryan just laughs and pulls on his t-shirt before handing me a towel. I dry off best I can and put my clothes back on. We walk back to the office together.

"Would you like to have lunch with me today?" Ryan asks as we walk back.

Yes. No. I wasn’t sure. "I brought a lunch with me today."

"You could always eat it tomorrow," he pleads.

"Alright."

"Did you want to go to that burger place?"

"You should have said that from the start," I tease.

"Ouch." He puts his hand up to his chest as though wounded.

Jennifer has her feet up on the desk and is filing her nails when we walk up. She glances up at us and slowly lowers her feet but keeps filing her nails.

"Jennifer, this is Grace."

"Figured as much."

I shoot Ryan a concerned look. "This is Jennifer in a good mood. We all stay far, far away from her otherwise."

She nods her head in agreement.

"I'd have fired her ages ago, but she is somewhat of a computer whiz, and we wouldn't have a website without her."

"I prefer computer genius," Jennifer says, looking up from her nails.

"Alright, computer genius. I'm taking Grace to lunch. Want me to bring you back some onion rings?"

Her eyes light up, and she nods before realizing she looks too happy. She leans back into her chair and shrugs.

"Come on," Ryan says, taking my hand again and walking to his car.

His hand feels so warm in comparison to mine. I'm both thrilled and terrified by the physical contact. Ryan walks me to the passenger side and opens my door for me. Why does this feel like a date? Is this a date? I know I like him. I really like him and not just because I dream about running my fingers through his brown hair. He's a good person. I'm amazed he's single. Must be hard to meet people eating dinner with my grandmother every night.

"Grace, I have to tell you something."

He looks so stressed. "Is everything okay?"

"I hope so. Well, here's the thing. I'm attracted to you."

I inhale sharply. I thought he might be, but I never expected him to be so blunt about it.

"And I think you might feel the same way about me. Do you?"

I feel incapable of responding but reach my hand out to set it on top of his. His eyes snap to mine, and it’s like his whole body relaxes.

"I was really nervous about telling you."

My mouth drops. "You were nervous around me?"

"Since the day I picked you up from the airport."

I don't understand. "But why?"

He gives me a half smile. "I think you're lovely, always have. When I heard you had a boyfriend, I was crushed."

I just shake my head. I can't imagine why he would be interested in me.

"So is this a date?'

"Nope. This is just lunch. If you aren’t doing anything Friday night, I'd like to take you on a date but not just that. I'd like to date you period. Is that something you would be interested in? Dating me?"

"I'd really like that."

His smile at my response is perfection. I laugh when he grabs my hand and kisses it. He is too cute. The rest of lunch is uncomfortable, but in a good way. I find myself transfixed by his lips. I don’t hear a word that come out of them but imagine them on me. When I’m not staring at his lips, I watch his hands, thinking back to when he had pulled me in front of him on the ski. Those hands on my waist. It’s hard to eat when I am so distracted. On the way out, Ryan picks up the take out order of onion rings for Jennifer.

When we are back at the office, Ryan leaves me with Jennifer for the afternoon. He is leading a kayak tour. I feel light and can't seem to stop smiling or looking at him.

"So you and Ryan?"

"Yes?"

She tilts her head at me. "Bummer."

"Do you like Ryan?"

She laughs. "Nope. I'm gay. Was kinda hoping you were too, blondie."

My mouth drops. Not really sure what the right response to that is so I just shrug, which makes her laugh. That seems to eliminate any tension that may have been there, and we work well together for the rest of the day. Not long before closing time, I watch Ryan return with the kayak tour. I am riveted watching his arms as his paddle slices through the water. Once he is parallel to the dock, he smoothly pulls himself and his yak out before helping other people. I blush when I remember my fall getting out of the kayak.

After everyone is out of their kayaks and the gear is stowed, Ryan comes to collect me. He takes off his shirt, using it to wipe his face in the office. He grabs a spare one and pulls it over his head. I did my best not to drool, still a bit flustered by the idea of him liking me. When we are in the car, he asks how I got on with Jennifer.

"She was great. I think she really liked me."

He groans. "Did she hit on you?"

I pause. "Not really."

"What did she say?" He glances at me, lifting a brow.

I’m laughing at this point. "Just that she was bummed I was with you."

"Can't blame her. I think Darrell was trying to hit on you, too."

"What?"

"May have to keep you with me at all times."

"Hush. Don’t be silly."

"I'm really only worried about next time Jack is in town."

"Your partner? Why?"

"I'm scared you'll take one look at him and forget all about me."

"Not going to happen."

He drops me off at Kate's. We both need a shower. He jokingly suggests we save water and take a joint shower. I do my best to look shocked while images of soaping up his chest flash through my mind. Kate is on the lanai, waiting to hear all about my first day. Ryan and I decide we are going to tell Kate about us together. After chatting with Kate for a few minutes, I hurry to take my shower, wanting to look nice when Ryan comes over. I’m getting dressed when I hear my phone buzz.

Quickly pulling my shirt on, I answer it. "Hello?"

"Hey, stranger!"

"Nikita, how are you?"

"Good, just missing you. So, how's Tampa, tell me all about it."

I tell her about the drive, the weather, my learning how to knit, and saving the best for last: Ryan.

"Shut up! That guy who came and helped you move? Oh my God, he is so friggin’ hot. How did it happen?"

"He took me jet skiing today. It was so intense. First, I was behind him, then he was behind me. Then he took me out to lunch and told me he was attracted to me and asked me if I would date him."

"Whoa, and that accent. I am super jealous right now."

"He's taking me out Friday, I'm excited but, I wonder...Do you think it's too soon? I mean, since Jon?"

"Do you still have feelings for Jon?"

"I think I will always miss what we had, sometimes I'm sad when I think about it, or angry, when I think about how he acted. I don't know if I'll ever forgive him, it's weird. I'm not in love with him anymore but we were together for so long it's just complicated."

"I get that, you can't just turn off feelings like that, but I don't think you're rushing. Didn't you say you guys have dinner together every night? Don't stress about it, just do what feels right. How's living with your grandmother? Didn't you say she's helping you make a scarf? Kim just bought a gorgeous scarf off Etsy. Text me a picture of the one you made, and I'll show it to everyone. While you're at it, send a picture of Ryan too. "

I'm just hanging up when I hear Ryan walk in. Crap. I wanted to brush my hair and put on some make up. I should have been multitasking while I was on the phone with Nikita but was too distracted talking. I grab my brush and quickly pull it through my still slightly damp hair. When I turn, he's leaning against my doorframe. Something comes over me, and I rush over to hug him.

His arms wrap around me. "Hey."

"Hi."

"You're going to be trouble. I can tell."

I go to pull away, and he holds me tighter. "No, no. I'm smelling your hair."

I tilt my face up to his and smile. He leans down and softly brushes his lips over mine. Our eyes are locked as he pulls back a breath. The look in his eyes makes me wonder if he acted on impulse. It feels like he is trying to gauge my reaction. I want him to know how happy I am that he kissed me. I put my hands around his neck and pull his lips back to mine. This kiss is not delicate. It is not sweet. Ryan pushes me up against the wall. My hands knot in his hair. His hands pull my hips tightly to him. His lips move to my neck as he pulls one of my legs up to his waist.

I try to catch my breath but can’t as long as he is touching me, I gently push him back, and my eyes widen when I see the hunger in his. This is going to be interesting. I bite my lip and grab his hand, pulling him towards Kate. I don't trust myself alone with him right now. Kate is sitting on the lanai, knitting. I keep his hand in mine and pull him into the room with me.

When Kate looks up and sees we are holding hands, she mutters, "Took you two long enough," before going back to her knitting.

"Kate!"

"What? You should've heard him talk about you when you went back to Cleveland."

He does his best to not look embarrassed. "What can I say? I was enchanted from the moment I first met you."

"Really?"

"Really." He leans down, brushing his lips against my cheek.

Kate sets her knitting down beside her and stands to hug and kiss both of us. "I say this is a reason to celebrate. Ryan, go open a bottle of wine." Once he is out of the room, she turns to me. "Are you happy, dear?"

I blush and nod, asking her if she thinks it’s too fast.

"It only takes a moment, sweetheart, if it's the right person."

Ryan walks back out with three glasses. After handing one to Kate and to me, he stands next to me with his arm around my waist.

After taking a drink, I jump. "I forgot. Here, can you hold this?" I hand my glass to Ryan. "Nikita asked that I send her a picture of my scarf. I'll go grab it from my room. Will you take the picture?"

Ryan nods, setting both of our glasses down on the table behind him. I hurry back in, handing him my cell phone. I am wrapping the scarf around my neck when the phone buzzes in his hand. He passes it to me, and I check it. It’s a text from Jon. I miss you, is all it says. I close my eyes, and let my hand drop to my side.

"Grace, are you alright?"

I open my eyes and meet Ryan's concerned gaze. "It's nothing." I click to the camera feature of my phone and hand it back to him

Ryan snaps a couple of pictures of me and passes my phone back to me. After making sure I look okay in the pictures, I pick my favorite one and text it to Nikita. I turn off the screen and put it in my pocket as I move to stand beside Ryan.

"Thank you." He slides his arm back around my waist, giving me my glass of wine.

Kate goes into the kitchen to take a casserole out of the oven.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Ryan asks, turning to face me.

"I am. It was a text from Jon. I just didn’t expect to hear from him again."

"You don’t have to tell me."

"I know. I’m just nervous about liking you so soon after things ended with him."

"I don’t want to rush you."

"It's not that. I just worry that you'll think less of me."

"Impossible."

I give him a half smile. He's adorable, and the way he's looking at me makes me feel suddenly shy. It’s still hard for me to understand that he's interested in me. I lean against him, putting my head down. Ryan sets his wine glass down and slowly rubs his hands up and down my back. I feel myself relax into him, and he leans his cheek on the top of my head.

"Grace, I want you to know I adore you, and the thought that you might return those feelings makes me very happy." I feel his chest lift as he inhales deeply and I look up at him.

"Your hair smells so good." He playfully runs his nose back and forth in my hair, making me laugh.

"Ryan, stop smelling her and set the table."

"Yes, ma'am," He says, grinning. He kisses me on the cheek before dropping his arms and walking to the kitchen.

Over dinner, I'm hypersensitive to Ryan. He seems to be discreetly touching me, avoiding Kate's notice. His knee bumps mine. His hand accidentally brushes my elbow. I can tell what he is doing. Ryan jumps up to help me when I get up to clear the table.

"I really want to kiss you again," he whispers to me as I load dishes into the washer.

I peek out the window over the sink that opens onto the pool deck to check where Kate is. Seeing her busy with her knitting, I turn and quickly give him a peck on the lips. Ryan informs me that is not the kind of kiss he was hoping for before turning me to face him, his hands tight on my hips. My mouth drops into an o shape as he slowly lowers his lips to mine. At first, his kiss is soft and feather light, but his kiss deepens as he pulls me to him. When I sigh, his tongue caresses my bottom lip before brushing over my own. My hands rise to wrap around his neck as I arch my body into his.

"Am I interrupting?" Kate is leaning on the kitchen table.

I turn quickly and reach for the next plate. "I, um, well, no."

"Yep, Kate. You are definitely interrupting," Ryan says, nuzzling his nose into my hair.

"Ryan!"

"What?"

"He's fine, dear. I just wanted to let you kids know that I'm going to bed." Kate winks at us before turning and going to her room.

I stand there, shaking my head. First, I cannot believe my grandmother just winked at me, and second, we've just barely finished dinner. Kate never goes to bed this early. I can feel the heat coming off Ryan. I just don’t know what to do or how far he wants to go. Will he be fine with just kissing? I’m not sure I’m ready for anything else.

"Want to go for a swim, Grace?"

"Okay. I have to change first."

"Alright. You go change, and I'll finish up in here."

I change into one of my new two-piece suits and meet him by the pool. He's already in the water. His head is down, like a crocodile, only his green eyes visible. I slowly make my way down the stairs as he swims over to me. He's in front of me as my foot touches the pool floor. He takes my hand, pulling me to the deeper side. When we stop, I sink down and let the water cover me, standing back up once my hair is wet.

"Like Aphrodite rising from the surf."

"Hush."

"Make me." He wraps his arms around me, pulling me in tight.

I place my hands on his arms, feeling the strength in them. I slide them up to his shoulders and then run my fingers in his hair as I tug his face towards mine. His lips are soft as he molds them to mine. I am drunk off of his touch, his hands trailing lazily up and down my back. His fingertips leave a trail of goose bumps in their wake. I shiver against him, making him pull me closer.

"Are you cold, Grace?" he says, moving his lips to my neck.

I shake my head and wrap my arms tightly around his neck. Suddenly, he pulls away, and I look at him, confused.

"Trying not to rush things."

"Oh."

"You have no idea how badly I want you right now."

I feel heat rush to my cheeks.

"I should probably go before I ravish you on the pool deck."

I don’t want him to leave but am not ready for what might happen if he stays. I get out of the pool and grab a towel for each of us. Ryan quickly towels off and hangs it on a hook by the pool. He pulls my towel from my hands and wraps it around my shoulders. He pulls me to him and captures my mouth again.

After kissing me soundly, he nips my ear. "See you in the morning."

I watch him walk across the backyard and to his house. He gives me a smile and wave just before he is out of sight. I go inside, locking up behind me. After changing for bed I look at my phone, still unsure of what to do with Jon's text. Should I even reply? What can I say in response to that? I have a new text. From him? I feel silly when I see it’s from Nikita instead. She loves the scarf and wants one herself. She specifically requests a purple one. I'm too amped to sleep, and it's still early. I pull out my shawl project, and I work on it as I think about Ryan and how he makes me feel. Stopping once my hands feel like they are going to fall off, I go to sleep.

~*~

Ryan and I fall into a comfortable rhythm, spending most of each day together. On Thursday, Ryan takes a group out fishing and asks if I'd like to be his first mate. The only boat I've ever been on is the kayak. The idea of being so far from the shore is exciting. He's taking a group of six out into the gulf for the day. Darrell is also going. Ryan and Jack own two boats for offshore fishing: a swanky luxury mini yacht named Seabreeze and a simple flats fishing boat named Squirt. The group going out that day consists of local lawyers celebrating a merger. Since they'll be taking Seabreeze, Ryan thinks I'll have fun coming along.

A couple of the attorneys attempt to flirt with me until Ryan announces that I'm his girlfriend and not part of the tour. Hearing that title shocks me. I know we're dating, but it overwhelms me that he already considers me his girlfriend. I’m stressing out over it so much that it must become obvious to him. He pulls me aside to explain he used the term to keep the guys from flirting with me and that he isn’t trying to rush me. Does that mean he doesn’t want me to be his girlfriend? I curse myself for my emotions being so all over the place. I don’t know how to feel about him calling me his girlfriend. Now it seems to bother me that he may not have meant it. Our first official date is tomorrow. I still have no idea where he's taking me.

The charter trip is fun but more work than I'd expected. When Ryan drops me off, I tell him I'll probably eat something and go straight to bed. The next day, I stay in the office having had too much sun the day before. We're busy but somehow the day still seems to drag. I’m counting down the minutes until my date. I'm having fun working with him, even though I spent Friday in the office he makes a point to swing by and steal kisses whenever he's free. I feel so comfortable around him, it doesn’t stop my heart from racing each time he is near me.

I absentmindedly check the time on my cell phone. I have a text from Nikita asking me how her scarf is coming along. I finished the shawl for Kate but haven't given it to her yet. I want it to be special, like a gift to thank Kate and make sure she knows how much everything she does means to me. I haven’t even started the scarf. I'm not even sure if Kate has purple yarn or if I will need to go buy some. I’m really getting into the idea of creation, of how cool it feels to make something. I even talk to Ryan about it during one of our drives into work. He tells me I'm adorable and if I like I can knit at work whenever we're slow.

"Grace?"

I look up. "Sorry."

"Did you hear what I asked?" Jennifer huffs.

"I didn’t. What's up?"

"So do you know where you guys are going tonight?"

"Ugh. No, and it's driving me crazy. I don’t like surprises, and I'm not sure how to dress. Ryan says anything is fine but that doesn’t help."

"Have you guys done it yet?"

"Jennifer!"

"Is that a yes or a no?"

"It’s a none of your business."

"Oh, come on. You guys live right next door to each other, and I've totally seen you making out with him when you think no one is watching."

I flush. "Either way…"

"If you haven’t, do you think tonight will be the night?"

I hadn’t thought about that. What if that's what he’s planning? I look down to the dock where Ryan is standing. His back is to me. He must have just gotten out of the water. I can see drips of water coming off of his suit as it clings to him in a mouthwatering way. It’s like he can sense my eyes, and he turns to look back at me. He waves, so I blow him a kiss. Instead of playfully catching it like your average male, Ryan sprints to me and kisses me soundly. When he finishes, Ryan takes in my glazed expression with twinkling eyes and is off again back to the dock.

"You guys are so doing it tonight," Jennifer mumbles to herself.

I feel warm all over at the thought. I check the time again and sigh, thinking it's not moving fast enough. The sound of a little black sports car squealing into their parking lot startles me.

"Da na na na." Jennifer hums “Bad to the Bone.”

"Someone you know?"

"Yep. Jack's back."

Oh, Jack, the partner with a bad case of wanderlust. I wonder if he even knows who I am or that I'm working here. I stand as he approaches us.

Whether he knows who I am or not is quickly answered with a, "So this must be Ryan's girl."

I redden and put out my hand.

Jack instead pulls me into a hug. "Lucky guy."

"Unhand my woman, scoundrel" Ryan walks up grinning.

"You never were good at sharing." Jack releases me and greets Ryan with a light punch on the shoulder.

"This is a surprise. What brings you into town?"

"My oldest, confirmed bachelor best friend meets a girl he can't stop talking about. I was too intrigued not to come see what all of the fuss was about."

I feel like locking myself in the bathroom, I don’t know if I've ever felt this evaluated before. Ryan comes to stand next to me, wrapping his arm around my waist. I shoot him a confused look, and he shrugs, waiting for the evaluation to be complete.

After another moment, Ryan says, "Well?"

"She's smoking. Well done, you. Sure you won't share?"

My mouth drops.

"No chance."

"Worth a shot."

"I'm still standing here" I add.

"Right. Grace, this is Jack. Jack, this is Grace."

"We've met."

"So really, why are you in town?"

"Bored mainly. Think Kate will mind another for dinner?"

"It will just be the two of you. Grace and I have plans tonight."

"I can call her," I offer, pleased my date is still on.

"That'd be great."

I grab my cell and dial Kate. When I explain, a third time that Jack is in town and would like to come for dinner, my grandmother sounds thrilled.

"Well, that's settled. So, where are you two headed tonight?"

"That's a surprise."

Jack turns to me. "Need a lift home?"

"I already have a ride," I say confused.

"Come on. It’ll give you more time to primp, and I can hang out with Kate."

"I don’t primp."

"Ever?" He seems shocked.

"Well, I guess sometimes." This really is the strangest conversation.

"And for tonight?"

"I have no idea where we are going." I glance up at Ryan. "He said to wear anything I'd like."

"That sounds clothing optional to me."

Who is this guy?

Ryan looks down at me. "It's not that kind of date."

"Bummer. Those are the best kind." He turns to Jennifer. "Still only into chicks?"

"Fraid so."

"So how long will you be in town?"

"Maybe a week. Can I crash in the spare?"

He hesitates. "Sure. In fact, it's almost quitting time. Jennifer, can you close up?"

She nods, and he turns to lead me out of the office. I stop, turning back to grab my purse and wave goodbye to Jennifer before reaching for his hand. Jack pulls out in front of us and speeds off.

"Well he's interesting."

"Jack's a character."

"And a flirt."

"Definitely a flirt. Good thing I asked you out before he got here."

"Why?"

"The girls go for Jack."

"Not for me. Thanks. My friend Nikita would be all over him, besides you have the hot accent."

Ryan relaxes "Hot? Well, when you put it that way."

Jack is parked in front of Kate's house when we pull up.

"So what time are you picking me up?"

"Seven. Feel free to primp."

"Good to know," I say, leaning over to give him a kiss.

He puts his hand on the back of my neck and deepens it. When I pull back, he has a dreamy expression on his face. He looks so cute I give him another quick peck before getting out of the car. I can hear Kate and Jack out by the pool. His voice carries, and I laugh when I realize he's flirting with Kate. I can tell Kate's loving every second of it.

"Hello, Kate. Jack."

"Oh, Grace, dear. Come sit with us. Jack was just telling me the funniest story about this girl in Brazil."

"Can’t. I've been told to ‘primp.’” Then I remember Nikita's text. "Kate, do you have any purple yarn?"

"Another knitter?" Jack asks.

"I taught her myself. And yes, dear, I do." Kate beams and then reaches into her basket for a couple skeins.

Taking them, I thank her before heading to my room. Once there, I regard my closet. Primp. That means dressed up, right? But how dressed up? I settle on a black maxi skirt with a white V-necked tank and pair it with a wide brown leather belt and sandals. I take a quick shower and shave my legs. After changing into my outfit, I dry my hair and put on some make up. Not much, mainly my eyes and some lip gloss. I think about curling my hair, but it seems like a wasted effort. Without tons of hairspray, the curls will never hold. I wear it down but slip an elastic around my wrist in case I want to pull it up.

After a spray of perfume, I grab one skein and my needles and sit with Kate and Jack.

"I must be losing my touch," Jack says, shaking his head a few minutes later, looking at the two of us knitting.

I have to laugh. That's pretty funny.

"So what are you making, Grace?"

"A scarf for one of my friends in Cleveland."

"How long does it take to make one?"

"Not long. Maybe three days if I knit in the evenings."

"You could sell them."

"No one would ever buy something from me."

"You'd be surprised. There’s this website I heard about called something like Easy…Tesey."

"Etsy?"

"That's it. I was talking to someone on my plane over about it."

"One of my old co-workers bought a scarf like this from there."

"You should find out how much she paid for it." He turns to Kate. "How much do each one of those balls of yarn cost?"

"These? Maybe three dollars, but there are more expensive options."

"How many balls—"

"Skeins," she corrects.

"How many skeins does it take to make a scarf?"

"If it is really wide or long, at least two."

"That's all? You could make a serious profit."

"Talking numbers again?" Ryan pops his head around the corner.

Seeing how he's dressed, I'm happy with my outfit. He’s wearing a pair of tan khakis and a charcoal grey dress shirt, sleeves rolled to his elbows. He leans down to give Kate a kiss on the check, never taking his eyes off of me.

"Telling Grace she should try and sell her scarves."

"You might want to listen to him, Grace. Jack has very good business sense."

"I'll think about it," I say, standing and walking over to Ryan.

"You look lovely," he breathes into my ear, making me shiver.

"You kids have fun tonight." Kate waves us off.

I wonder if it’s so she can be alone with Jack again. Looks like Kate's a flirt too. Ryan holds my hand as he walks me to his car and opens my door for me.

"So do I get to know where we're going yet?"

"Nope. Still a surprise."

I'm not expecting us to go to work. "Um, did you need to pick something up from the office?"

"You'll see."

He comes around and opens my door. I've never been here at night. There are white Christmas-style lights wrapped around the railing of the dock, and the Seabreeze is lit up similarly, with lights coiled around the metal guards. He takes my hand and leads me down to the dock. He helps me onto the boat, and I see there is a table set on its deck.

"This is beautiful, Ryan."

"This is nothing. You are beautiful. Want to drive?"

"But it's dark out."

"So is that a no?"

"How will I know where to go?"

"You'll have me."

Ryan unties the ropes securing the boat to the dock and uses a long wooden pole to push it clear. He has it away from the dock before he motions for me to come and take the wheel. He stands behind me, hands resting on my hips. He whispers directions in my ear. I look back to watch the lights from the shoreline grow smaller. The water is fairly calm. Once we're maybe twenty minutes out, he cuts the engine and drops the anchor. The moon is near full and out over the water. It gives more light than I'd have expected. It’s as though its glow is diminished by all of the electric lights I'm accustomed to.

We sit, and I laugh when Ryan pulls out a bag of take out and milkshakes from the burger joint. I figure he must have had help, maybe Jennifer. He even remembers I like artichokes on my burger. As we eat, the water gently laps the sides of the boat. This is only my second time sailing, but I can tell how much it means to Ryan. I munch on an onion ring, belatedly worrying over my breath. Will it matter since he is eating them too? When I excuse myself to use the restroom, I'm thrilled to see a bowl of mints below deck.

Ryan is cleaning up when I come back up. After stowing a trash bag, he crooks his finger at me, motioning me to come to him. He's crouched when I stand in front of him. He slowly rises, running his hands up the sides of my legs as he does. My breath catches in my throat as I think back to what Jennifer had said. Does he want to sleep with me? Tonight? There’s a cushioned bench behind him, and he tugs me down with him as he sits. I am in his lap, my legs draped over to one side.

My hands are on his shoulders. He has one arm tightly wrapped around my waist. His other arm starts on the small of my back and slides upward and under my hair to the back of my neck. He pulls my face to his. My arms tighten around his neck when he bites my lip. I moan when he moves his lips to my neck and then lower, to the curves visible from the top of my V-neck. The bench is wide enough for him to shift us to where we are lying side by side. He gently runs his fingers up and down my arm, laughing at the sea of goose bumps his fingers leave in their wake. Shivering, I move closer to him. He moves his hand to my neck. His fingers are in my hair, and his thumb draws lazy circles on my earlobe.

"You are so lovely."

I bury my face in his neck, embarrassed.

"Don't be shy."

I keep my head down, shaking it. This whole thing is so surreal and different from where I was just two months ago. It’s hard for me to reconcile that point of my life to now. It almost doesn’t feel real. Here I am, on a boat, in the Gulf of Mexico, in the arms of a beautiful man.

"Grace, look at me."

My eyes rise to meet his, and I'm trapped in the intensity of them. We're almost nose to nose, and time seems to stop as I feel his desire. I bite my lip and watch as his eyes drop to my mouth, the corners of his lips turning up as he brings his eyes back to mine. We both turn at the sound of a large splash near the boat.

"What was that?"

"Don’t worry. Probably just a big fish." He laughs at my expression. "You’re safe with me."

I snuggle back into his arms, and he softly rubs his hand up and down my back. I’m not sure what kind of cologne he uses but love the way it smells. I remember the day I held his hoodie to my face to smell it. This is way better. Something about the rocking of the boat and the warmth of his embrace lulls me to sleep. I wake with a start when he nibbles on my ear. It takes me a moment to understand where I am, and then my eyes snap to his shirt to make sure I've not done something embarrassing like drool on him. Thankfully, I have not.

"We should be heading back."

"Why? Let's just stay out here."

"Not tonight. But maybe we can sail one weekend somewhere."

"I'd like that."

His lips move to my neck. "Now that I've woken you. I don’t want to go back."

"Then don’t."

"Would you really like to sleep out here?"

I turn and look up at the sky. It’s like I've never seen it before. So clear and full of stars, but as warm as Ryan is, it is getting chilly.

"It is a bit cold, but it's so beautiful."

"It’s warmer in the cabin. There's a bed down there if you'd like to sleep on the boat tonight."

"Where will you sleep?"

"I'll be fine up here with some blankets."

"Would you like to go in the cabin with me?"

"I don’t want you to feel pressured to do anything."

"I don’t. I just like the idea of falling asleep in your arms. Besides, we've slept in the same room before."

"But not the same bed."

"I know."

"You sure?"

I sit up and pull him with me below deck. The door to the cabin is just past the bathroom. In the room is a platform-styled queen bed with a thick blue comforter on it. I slip off my sandals and lay back on the bed as he slowly closes the door behind him, watching me. I scoot back to the pillows and pull the comforter from underneath me to cover myself. Once I’m settled, he lays down next to me but on top of the covers.

"Ryan, come on. Get under the covers."

He groans, sitting up to kick off his shoes before joining me. Even though I was tired before, the idea that I'm lying in a bed with him has me wired awake, and considering how chilly it is outside, it's getting stuffy in here. Ryan must feel that way as well. He sits up to slide open two small circular windows that are on either side of the cabin to allow the air to circulate. I push the comforter down, and he pulls me into his arms. His kisses are urgent, and his hands are buried in my hair. I cling to him as he lowers me onto the bed and covers me with his body.

My hands wrap around his back, and I pull him closer to me. I start tugging on his shirt, wanting to feel his skin. He sits up and pulls it and the t-shirt he wears under it off. Before he lays back down, I bring my hands up to his chest. He’s on the lean side, but his muscles are defined in a way that's making my mouth water. His shoulders and biceps are rock hard, and I know it’s from all of the lifting and kayaking he does at work. He has an amused expression on his face as I explore the contours of his body.

"What?" I ask, catching his eye.

He shrugs, a very mischievous look on his face. "Just looking forward to my turn."

I blush, turning to hide my face in a pillow.

"Had not meant for that to be a scary thing." He playfully tugs on my arm. "Grace, I'm not in any hurry. Well, truthfully, I'd love for stuff to happen sooner rather than the alternative. What I'm trying to say is never, ever feel rushed with me, okay? And I promise to sit on my hands if you want to touch me again because that felt heavenly."

I peek up at him before sitting back up, bringing my hands to touch him again. I hear him sharply inhale when I lean down to kiss his chest. When I look back up at him, he captures my mouth with his. A moan escapes my lips, and Ryan pulls back. I look at him, confused.

"Just need a minute. Scratch that, Maybe an hour."

I lie back against the pillows and bite the knuckle of my index finger to hold back a laugh. It’s hard not to feel giddy looking at this beautiful man and knowing the effect I am having on him. It makes me feel dizzy and amazed that this is actually happening. Knowing how he is seals it for me; how he flew to Cleveland to help me move down here; how he takes care of Kate. I picture the sweet little grannies gushing over him at the knitting club. When I had fallen in love with Jon, there was this bad boy appeal to him. He'd talked me into ditching the date I was on to be with him. It had been exciting, but when times got rough, he'd taken it out on me.

Ryan doesn’t need to act like that. There is no reason for him to be aggressive or a bully. Like when those lawyers made a pass at me. He had not yelled or threatened them, just said I was his girlfriend and that was that. I know, though, just as he had said above on the deck, that he will protect me.

He swings his legs over the side of the bed. On my knees, I move over to him and begin gently kissing his back.

"Ryan?"

He turns to look at me.

"What if I don’t want to wait?"

I grab his hand and pull him back to me before unhooking my belt and dropping it over the side of the bed. Then I take his hands and place them on the hem of my shirt and lift my arms up in the air for him to pull it off of me. He leans down to kiss the swell of my breasts as I reach behind to unclasp my bra. When it is unhooked, he slowly slides it from me.

"Are you sure?"

I nod, inching closer to him. He takes me in his arms, and the sensation of his bare chest on mine is amazing. He lowers me to the bed and eases my skirt down my legs until it joins the pile of clothes on the cabin floor. He then explores my body with his mouth and hands. I learn what it means to be cherished. He asks me over and over if I’m sure, so cautious about crossing a line with me. It gets to the point where I finally beg him to take me. He makes short work of the rest of his clothes after that. He panics momentarily, looking for a condom and then checks the expiration of it once he finds one. He shrugs, admitting it has been a while. In fact, the condom is probably Darrell's. I don’t care. I’m just relieved he's able to find one.

Ryan makes love to me on that boat as it rocks in the Gulf of Mexico and the fresh sea air drifts through the windows. In the end, as we lay in a panting tangle of arms and legs, I feel wonderful, worshipped. He pulls me closer to him and tucks a loose strand of hair behind my ear before kissing me. We fall asleep like that. The next morning, when I wake up in his arms, I look up to see him grinning down at me.

He kisses my forehead. "I did not expect that to happen."

I run my nose over his earlobe. "Happy?"

"Thrilled. Except for the fact that you'll be sleeping next door and not in my arms tonight."

"I can sleep over if you'd like."

"I'd like that very much. I think we should head back before Kate starts to worry."

We both slowly dress. Ryan uses the bathroom first before heading up to pull the anchor. I find a tube of toothpaste in the bathroom and use my finger to brush my teeth as best as I can before going to join him. He hasn’t put his dress shirt back on. Watching him steer the boat in his khakis and undershirt is such a turn on. I walk over and wrap my arms around his waist. He reaches around and pulls me in front of him, kissing the back of my head. He steers with one hand, the other pulling me to him. I bring both of my arms to hold his arm tighter to my chest.

When we get closer to the dock, Ryan uses the hook end of the long wooden pole he had used to push us from the dock the night before. He has me hold the pole while he jumps onto the dock and ties the boat to two posts. I help him collect our things and the trash from the boat before he helps me off. Walking back up the hill towards his car, I try to wrap my brain around the fact that I had just made love on a boat with the Adonis standing beside me. He drives most of the way with one hand on my thigh, lazily rubbing his thumb back and forth. He parks in front of Kate's house and walks me to the door. I had meant to give him a sweet peck before I walk in, but he deepens it, pulling me to him.

"Do you want me to come in with you?"

"Don’t be silly. Besides, you probably have Jack wondering where you are."

He kisses me again before turning to walk home. I slip inside and go to find Kate, going first to the lanai. When I walk in, I’m surprised to see Jack eating breakfast with Kate. And here I am, strolling in and wearing my clothes from last night. The look Jack gives me makes me blush further.

"Hi, Kate. Hello, Jack. Um, just wanted to let you know I was home."

"Sit, dear. We want to hear all about your date."

"Is it okay if I take a quick shower first?"

"Feeling dirty?" Jack grins at me.

"Shut it, mate." Ryan walks in behind me and kisses my cheek.

"I thought you were going home."

"Figured Jack came over here."

"Why don’t you hang out with them? I'd really like to change."

"Of course." He kisses me sweetly, and I head to my room.

I take a quick shower, throwing on a polo and some shorts, then brush my teeth and hair before going back out to the pool deck. Kate is knitting while Ryan tells them about our date. When I walk in, Jack is questioning my choice of burger toppings.

"It's really good," I argue.

"Still sounds gross."

"Then don’t eat it."

"Trust me, I won't."

"So did you stay on the boat all night?" Kate asks.

I look at Ryan.

"Well, I know they didn’t come back to Ryan's place."

"Yes, we spent the night on the boat. That's enough about that. Kate, how was your evening?" I say, picking up my knitting.

We all sit around chatting after that, Jack unsuccessfully tries to steer the conversation back to what happened on our date a couple of times. Before long, Ryan and Jack leave. Ryan needs a shower, and Jack is actually in town to check out some real estate.

Kissing me on the cheek, Ryan whispers. "Did you still want to spend the night tonight?"

I nod, blushing. The grin he gives me makes me blush even more. I push him away, laughing. I think he’s left when he hurries back into the room to give me another kiss before leaving.

"That boy is smitten with you."

"You think so?"

"Yes, Grace. I'm certain, and I do believe you feel the same way."

"I do. I feel a bit weird, like it is too soon since I stopped seeing Jon. Did I tell you he texted me that he missed me? How strange is that? As strange as that makes me feel, I can't deny how I feel about Ryan."

"Ryan is wonderful. I can see why you like him."

"But I think I more than like him. What if he doesn’t more than like me?"

"I wouldn’t worry about that, dear. I'm pretty sure he more than likes you."

"I hope you're right."

"You just dropped a stitch, and I know I'm right."

I look down at my knitting. "Will you help me get it back?"

Kate fixes my dropped stitch then pats me on the knee.

"Do you think these are good enough to sell like Jack said?"

"I've seen the stuff they sell in the stores. I know many people prefer handmade. I do. Is this something you would like to do?"

"I don’t know. Maybe."

"I would be sure about it before you do."

"I feel like it would be really cool to be my own boss, not that I don’t like working with Ryan. I do. It's just that now that we're going out on dates—"

"And having sleepovers."

I flush. "And, er, having sleepovers. Will it be weird that he's my boss?"

"I don’t know. I can see if you only knew him that way but you haven’t, and I believe this has been brewing for a while."

"I just keep thinking about it and how cool it would be. I've seen all of these cool things I could try and make. You know, like those scarves that attach at the ends, or maybe hats. Do you think I could make hats?"

"Hats are easy and don’t take very long to make, but won't you be busy spending time with Ryan?"

"I'm sure I will, but maybe I could do this too. I'm getting faster, and I don’t have to look down at my hands as much."

"Well, you seem very comfortable making scarves. Why don’t I teach you how to make a hat when you are done with that one, and what ever happened to the shawl you were working on?"

I set my knitting down and tell Kate I will be right back. Now is the perfect time to give it to her because it’s just the two of us. I hurry to my room to retrieve it. I have it neatly folded and tied with wide white ribbon around it. I hug it to my chest as I walk back onto the lanai.

"Kate?" My voice is shaking.

"Yes, dear?"

"I made this for you. I don’t have much, and you gave me the one thing that I didn’t think I would ever have again: family. I know things were strained with you and my mom. I just wish more than anything that she would have moved past it before, well. It’s just that you have come to mean so much to me, to do so much for me."

Kate reaches out to grab one of my hands. I wipe away a tear with the other.

“I'm happier than I've ever been, and I want you to know it's because of you. I can't imagine what you went through, losing Ronny and then my mom. When you explained that the purpose of the shawl was to give comfort," I struggle to finish. "I just wanted to do something to give you comfort."

"Come here, child." Kate pats the seat next to her, and once I sit, Kate pulls me into a gentle hug. "Grace, when you called me that day and said that you would come and see me, that was the greatest gift anyone has ever given me. You didn’t know me. That day, you gave me a family as well. I would be honored to accept your gift."

I stand only to go grab a box of tissues from the house.

"Aren't we a mess?" Kate laughs, pulling an extra one from the box.

I nod, wiping my eyes.

"Hello." Ryan walks in, then sees us crying. "What’s wrong?"

"Oh, don’t mind us, dear. Grace just gave me a lovely gift so I'm being sentimental."

I stand, and he gives me a hug. "I'm just trying to thank her for taking me in."

He rests his chin on top of my head and holds me tight. "I should probably be thanking her as well, for bringing you to me."

"Don’t you make me cry too, young man. Why don’t you take Grace out for an ice cream?"

He bends his knees, lowering himself to eye level with me. "Sound good?"

I nod, then turn back to Kate. "Can we bring you back some?"

"Twist my arm."

I lean down to kiss her cheek. "Will do."

Walking together to Ryan's Jeep, I can't help but notice how perfectly my hand fits in his. He walks me to the passenger side door, leaning me against it. Taking his thumbs, he gently wipes the moisture away from below my eyes. I close my eyes and let my hands sit on the waist band of his shorts as he presses soft kisses on my forehead, cheeks, nose, and lastly, lips. I open my eyes before he pulls away and become lost in his gaze. His smile is infectious. As we stand there, inches apart, I feel so exhilarated. Reaching my hands up to his neck, I pull him in for another deeper kiss. His lips, his touch, him. I want to lose myself in all of it.

Breaking our kiss, Ryan looks slightly dazed when he pulls back. "If we don’t stop, I'm going to throw you over my shoulder and take you to my bed."

I hide my face in his shirt. That's exactly what I want to do. But there's Kate. "How about we go get ice cream, and once Kate lies down this afternoon, we do that."

"Really?" He can’t keep the excitement out of his voice.

"Mm hm."

He leans down to kiss me again, pulling me towards him as he backs away from the car and reaches behind me to open my door before taking his lips from mine. I slide into my seat, resting my hands on my knees as he shuts my door. While we drive to the ice cream parlor, I tell Ryan I’m interested in maybe trying to open my own Etsy store. Ryan thinks it’s brilliant and promises to help in any way he can. The ice cream parlor he takes me to has a drive thru. Since we're bringing back ice cream for Kate, we use it. Ryan picks up three hand-packed pints: French Vanilla for Kate, Chocolate Raspberry Truffle for me, and Mint Chocolate Chip for himself.

They give us plastic spoons with our order, and I consider starting mine right away but figure I can wait until we get back to the house. Eating ice cream instead of lunch around the pool is a guilty pleasure we all enjoy indulging in. When Kate goes to lie down, Ryan looks at me mischievously. My stomach flips. Why am I so nervous all of a sudden? I felt so confident earlier out by his car. I can tell he is trying to figure out what I want to do. Why am I even nervous? I want him, and I know he wants me too. I stand and reach out my hand to him.

Ryan pulls me into his lap, his hands molded to my hips, kissing me hungrily as if my lips are the only possible relief for his hunger. I tangle my fingers in his hair, gasping when he lifts me and carries me out the back door and across the yard to his house.

"I…can…walk," I breathe between kisses.

His lips move to my neck as he replies, "Not a chance."

Entering by the side door, he pulls back enough to shout, "Jack!" a couple times, then looking back at my confused look, "Just wanted to make sure he isn’t here."

He nudges the door to his bedroom open with his foot and kicks it closed behind us. Claiming my mouth once more, he eases me onto his bed. I tug at his shirt, and pausing for a beat, he pulls it off. He lies down next to me, pulling me on top of him. Our clothes are shed and heaped on the floor by the bed in moments. I feel timid about my body. It had been so dark on the boat the night before. This feels more intimate, like there is no part of me I can hide. Ryan takes his time exploring my every curve. When I feel like I can't take it any longer, he reaches for a condom.

Locking eyes as he sinks into me, Ryan groans. I giggle at his expression. He playfully nips at my chin before rocking his hips against mine. It's no laughing matter when he lifts my leg to his shoulder. I twist my hands into the pillows behind me, arching to meet him over and over again. Sitting up, his hands are vices on my hips, setting a pace that ignites something within me. Feeling I'm close, he leans back down to cover me, and I wrap my legs around his waist. Placing one hand on either side of my face, his lips find mine, and I cling to him as I come undone. He collapses on top of me only moments later.

"So beautiful." He dances soft kisses all over my face.

"This doesn’t even seem real."

"Very real." He moves to kissing the tops of my shoulders.

"Like too good to be true."

"Nope. Just the right amount of good and very true."

"You are so silly."

"And you are heavenly."

"How is it possible that you didn’t have a girlfriend when we met?"

He leans back, resting his head on his hand, fingertips of his other hand drawing lazy circles on my thigh. "I've never been much of a going out guy. When I moved here, I was so busy with the business and became such good friends with Kate I just wasn’t in a position to meet many girls."

"Do you like me just because I'm around?" I say it jokingly but am insecure in his feelings for me.

"The very first moment I saw you, Grace, in the airport, I thought who is this blue eyed, blonde goddess, and what must I do to make her mine? I was very bothered when I learned you had a fella, but you were so amazing I figured you could not be single."

"Hush."

"Do you miss him?"

I pull Ryan to me. "I miss what we had, but that was long gone before I met you."

"I'm very happy you feel that way," he says before covering my mouth with his.