Shame on Me

“Well, aren’t you just a ray of sunshine this morning,” I deadpan as I close the door behind her and go right back to my previous position on the couch.

I know why she’s here. Aside from the fact that I’ve been ignoring her since Friday night, I’m positive that Matt called the office and filled her in on what a lying bitch I am. She’s probably here to fire me. I’m an ex-model and now an ex-almost-private investigator. I’m washed up. A has-been. They’re going to do an E! True Hollywood Story on me and it’s going to be depressing.

“Care to tell me why you haven’t answered my or Lorelei’s calls in the past two days?” Kennedy asks.

“Don’t feel bad about firing me. I already know I screwed up,” I mumble into the couch.

“Drph feem brph amerph frmy meh. Eh affreffy mow eh srphed upff” is what Kennedy hears.

Kennedy’s hand slides under my face and she lifts my head up off of the cushion. “You want to try that again? I don’t speak couch cushion.”

I sigh, pushing myself up, and move to the middle, flopping back down on my butt this time. I repeat the part about firing me.

Kennedy stares down at me. “What the hell are you talking about? Why would I fire you?”

Either she has no clue what I’m referring to, or she’s just messing with me. I wouldn’t put it past her. Maybe she wants me to die a slow, painful death of humiliation.

“You know, the whole Matt Russo thing,” I add, fishing for clues that she knows what I’ve done.

Kennedy shakes her head at me in annoyance. “So you haven’t been able to catch the bastard cheating yet. It’s not that big of a deal, Paige. Just give it time.”

Oh, my God. He didn’t call and tell her everything. Wait. Why didn’t he call and tell her everything?

“I know I’m not hip to fashion like you are, but you do know you’re wearing Hello Kitty pants, right?” she asks, staring down at my legs.

“Did you just say ‘hip to fashion’? What are you, ninety?”

“Oh, fuck off. Get your ass up and take a shower. Do you want to . . . go shoe shopping or something?” Kennedy asks, visibly wincing when she says the word “shopping.”

“Awww, it’s so sweet that you would do that just to make me feel better,” I tell her with a smile. “There’s a sale at Nordstrom today and I want to swing by a few salons so we can interview new stylists, since ours became a drug runner. We should also get you some new lingerie to make Griffin happy, and there’s this black dress I want your opinion on at Express.”

I watch the horror come over her face with each and every word I say, and I feel a little less sorry for myself as I tease her.

“Wipe that look off your face. Like I’d really put you through all that torture in one day,” I tell her.

“Thank Christ.”

Now that she sees I’m still alive and not planning on forcing her to shop with me all day, Kennedy turns and heads for the door. “Lorelei said you might have gotten a few photos the other night that you think aren’t good enough to nail Matt. Upload them onto my computer when you get to the office tomorrow and I’ll take a look.”

Well, shit. Now I really AM going to cry. Lorelei didn’t rat me out to Kennedy either. Now I just need to think of a way to “lose” those photos and find out who this Vinnie guy is before Kennedy realizes I have completely violated the contract she signed with Melanie. Knowing that gold-digging whore, she’ll come back and sue us too.



“So, I know you didn’t just ask me to lunch because you miss me. What’s the real reason I’m here?” Ted asks me.

Ted was recently promoted to detective with the South Bend Police Department after he assisted Kennedy in bringing down one of the biggest drug rings in Indiana a few weeks ago. He mostly works with the DEA, but I know he’s got the inside scoop on pretty much every criminal in this state.

“Of course I miss you. I feel like we haven’t hung out in ages,” I lie.

“I wasn’t born yesterday, Paige. What are you up to and does Kennedy know about it?” he asks.

I bristle at his comment that Kennedy needs to know everything I’m doing. Once again, people misjudge my ability to get anything done on my own.

“I’m working on my own case and no, Kennedy doesn’t know about it. Not yet. I want to get some more concrete information before I go to her.”

The lies are just flowing right off my tongue these days.

“Don’t you just handle office work and stuff?”

“Contrary to popular belief, I’m not an idiot. I do have a brain, and every once in a while, I like to use it,” I reply cockily.

“That’s not what I meant and you know it. I just want to make sure you’re being safe. My sister has a lot of experience taking down bad guys and even she was an idiot with how she handled things a few weeks ago.”

“I’m not taking down any bad guys, I promise. I just need information on one,” I admit.

“You swear you aren’t going to go off half-cocked like she did and go to some nut job’s house alone?” Ted asks.

I raise my right hand. “I swear.”