Not by Sight A Novel

CHAPTER 8

The next morning, Abby clocked out at Flutter’s and left by the side door. She skipped down a flight of stairs and counted thirteen people on the deck, sitting at umbrella tables, enjoying the spectacular view of Beaver Lake and the rolling mountains beyond. She went down the stairs to the ground level and was walking across the street when her cell phone rang. She glanced at the screen. Caller Unknown.

“Hello.” She heard someone breathing into the phone. “This is Abby. Who’s there?”

“Listen carefully,” said a muffled male voice. “Stop askin’ questions about the girl, and don’t tell nobody about this call. Or you’re liable to go missin’ too.”

“Who is this?” Abby felt as if her heart had been dropped off a cliff. “Hello?”

The phone went dead.

Abby stood frozen in the driveway, her heart pounding, her mind racing wildly with the implications. Who would call and say such a terrible thing? Who didn’t want her to find Ella …? And why …? What had she gotten herself into …?

Wait a minute—Abby’s fear quickly turned to anger—this kind of mean prank reeked of Mason Craddock and his pathetic jock friends. She could just imagine them laughing and slapping each other on the back. And to think she almost fell for it!

Abby felt at the same time relieved and incensed. She kicked a pebble across the driveway. What a jerk. Mason was still mad at her for turning him down when he asked her to the spring dance. He must have gotten her cell number off one of the cards she had passed out around town.

Even if Mason and his brainless clones had gotten wind of Abby’s search for the girl, why would they have automatically assumed that she was looking for her sister and using the doll story to cover up her real motive? Was she that obvious? Had other people figured it out too?

Abby felt heat scalding her cheeks. Why should she care what they thought? How could they even begin to understand the emptiness she lived with, day in and day out? Or how it felt not to know what had happened to your dad and sister?

She considered for a moment calling Mason and letting him know exactly what she thought of his sick joke. Then again, why give him the satisfaction of knowing that he’d finally gotten her attention? That’s exactly what he wanted.

Abby looked at the picture of Ella on her cell phone. Why was she so inexplicably drawn to this child? Was it because she wanted more than anything for her to be Riley Jo? Or was there a true connection that defied words?

Either way, until she knew the answer, she wouldn’t stop looking for her.



Kate leaned on the wood railing on the umbrella deck at Angel View Lodge and looked out over Beaver Lake. The morning fog had lifted, and scores of sailboats and fishing charters were moving in all directions on the blue water. She spotted a number of Angel View paddleboats out there, as well as the three green-and-white houseboats she rented by the day or week.

A mixed flock of gulls and terns flew in the direction of Egret Island. The sky was azure and cloudless, the breeze mild. She never stopped being amazed that she owned this little slice of heaven, even though managing the lodge by herself was difficult. How she missed Micah—his entrepreneurial spirit. His innovation. His talent for fixing most anything. His friendly interactions with guests.

Her man had a passion for natural beauty evidenced by all the windows and decks he had designed to ensure that guests at the lodge could soak in the view from every side. Each task, project, or hobby he undertook, he did with exuberance. The word boring wasn’t even in Micah’s vocabulary.

Usually, when there was tension between them, he was the even-tempered half of the partnership. Slow to anger. Quick to forgive—and forget. Half the time she didn’t even have to tell him what she was thinking. He could look past the exterior and read her heart. No one could bring Kate out of a bad mood like Micah. When she wanted to pout and hang on to her anger, Micah would pull her into his arms and just hold her. It was as though he could see her soul—flaws and all—and cherished her anyway.

Or so she thought. Sometimes she wondered if she had finally pushed him over the edge of his patience with her stubborn unwillingness to consider putting some of their money into a riskier investment. They’d had arguments before but had never found themselves at such an impasse. Despite all of Micah’s wonderful qualities, he was a risk taker and couldn’t seem to understand that Kate wasn’t.

Outwardly, Kate rejected the notion that this man, who had loved her so deeply and devoted himself to making her happy, would have turned to another woman. But deep down, the fear tormented her. For weeks before his disappearance, she’d been consumed with financial worries. Their communication was often strained and their lovemaking nonexistent, solely Kate’s doing and something she now deeply regretted. What she wouldn’t give just to feel Micah’s arms around her again.

Kate looked out at the glistening lake. She had finally reached a level of acceptance that made it bearable to move forward without her husband and baby girl. But Abby’s stubborn insistence that the child she saw could be Riley Jo threatened to unearth the broken dreams Kate had finally been able to bury. She would not bury them twice. She refused to be deceived again by false hope.

Just seeing the picture of the little girl had been upsetting. The child’s face was sweet, her facial features dainty, like Riley Jo’s. Was it God’s way of taunting her, rubbing salt in the raw wound that would probably never heal? What did He want from her? She had been a faithful follower when He broke His promise never to leave or forsake her. Where was He during those agonizing days, weeks, months, and years when she cried out to Him for relief from the pain that tormented her? When she struggled to survive with the broken heart that He, in His sovereignty, had allowed to break?

It was difficult enough that He had repaid her faithfulness with suffering. But it was unbearable that He had left her to endure it alone. That He had removed His presence from her when she needed Him most. Every sympathy card she got encouraged her to reach out to Him for comfort. But there was no comfort. No loving arms to wrap her in the peace that passes understanding. If she learned anything from losing her husband and daughter, it was that God couldn’t be trusted.

It would be disingenuous of her to encourage her children to put their faith in a God capable of such indifference. Though she missed that passionate longing for the spiritual. And the sense of being deeply loved by the God of the universe. Her father had it. So did Abby. Soon Jesse would. But not Kate. Never again. And she was not going to feel guilty for not buying into the religious hype. God was not what He claimed to be. And her faith had not withstood the betrayal. It was all a myth.

Kate felt a hand on her shoulder and jumped.

“Sorry if I scared you,” Hawk said. “Could we talk privately for a minute?”

Kate glanced at the crowd of folks on the umbrella deck. “Sure. Let’s go downstairs.”

Kate walked down the steps to the ground level, then turned around. “What is it, Hawk? You look upset.”

“Did you know Abby has been asking people in town if they know who the girl in the picture is?”

Kate bit her lip. “I did not. How’d you find out?”

“I went into Bella’s to get donuts and saw Abby’s name and cell number on a card at the register. I asked Laura Lynn about it. She said Abby and Jay were in there last night, asking if anyone knew Ella’s last name and where she lived. And if they were uncomfortable giving out that information, would they contact her parents and ask them to call Abby. She showed Laura Lynn a doll and said it belonged to Ella, and Abby wanted to return it.”

Kate dropped her head into her hands and shook it. “Okay, I’ll take care of it.”

“You have to make her stop.”

“I said I’ll take care of it, Hawk. That means you need to drop it and let me handle it.”

“Abby’s freaking me out. Why won’t she let them go?”

“She just wants her father and sister back,” Kate said. “She hasn’t accepted the finality of the situation.”

“Well, she’d better. She looks like an idiot.”

“To whom?” Kate said. “She’s just telling people she wants to return a lost doll.”

“There are plenty of folks who know Abby’s history and are smart enough to see through that. What’re you going to say to her?”

“Let me worry about that. I would appreciate it if you’d just leave it alone.”

“All right, Mama.” Hawk kissed her cheek. “I’m heading out to take that couple from Illinois on a jeep ride.”

“Be safe,” Kate said.

“I’ll be home for dinner.”

Kate walked across the street, fighting back the tears that threatened to spoil her professional demeanor. She sat on the porch steps of the log house and keyed in Abby’s cell number. Halo came out from under the porch and nestled next to her. The phone rang four times.

“Hello, Mama.”

“Where are you, Abby?”

“I’m at Tutty’s with Jay. His boss is letting me sample the barbecue. It’s incredible.”

“I’d like you to come home. There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“Like what? I was going to hang out with Jay until he starts his shift at four.”

“Just come home. We’ll talk then.”

“Can’t you give me a hint?” Abby said.

“Come to the house, not the office.” Kate glanced at her watch. “I’ll see you in an hour.”

“All right. I’m going to get off now. It’s noisy. I can’t hear you very well.”

“One hour, Abby.”



Abby went in the front door and tossed her purse on the couch. “Mama?”

“I’m in the kitchen.”

Abby went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. “You want something to drink?”

“I’m fine.” Mama sounded stuffed up, her eyes red-rimmed.

Abby grabbed a bottle of spring water and sat at the table, facing her mother. “What’s wrong?”

“Why are you going around town asking about the little girl whose picture you took?”

“You told me not to bring it up again.”

“I’m bringing it up. Answer me, please.”

“I want to know who she is, that’s all.”

“Abby, that’s not all. You’ve been claiming to have a doll that belongs to her.”

“It’s Riley Jo’s doll.”

“So it’s a lie.”

Abby took a sip of water. “Not if I’m going on the premise she might actually be Riley Jo.”

“But she’s not. Her name’s Ella.”

Abby didn’t flinch. How did her mother know that? “According to the clerk at Murchison’s, the man and woman she was with called her Ella. But what if those people aren’t her parents?”

“Your sister isn’t coming back, Abby. Neither is your father. You’ve got to accept that. You’re not living with reality, and I’m afraid it’s going to hurt you.”

“No, you’re afraid I’m going to embarrass you again.”

Mama’s eyes welled with tears. “I’ve got a call in to Dixie. We need to nip this in the bud.”

Abby felt hot all over. “Do you really think you can counsel away my hope? I don’t get what you’re afraid of. If it turns out I’m wrong about Ella, so what? But if I’m right, it would be amazing.”

“This behavior is over the top,” Mama said.

“Because I want to find out who she is?”

“You can’t pester people in town.”

“Not one person I’ve talked to seems to mind. I’m just getting the word out there that I want to return her doll, and I’m leaving my name and cell number. If someone knows who she is, they might tell her parents, and they’ll call me.”

“Then what?”

“I’ll tell them that Ella reminds me so much of my baby sister who disappeared. I’ll ask if I can meet her. That just seeing her up close would help me to let my sister go.”

“No parent in their right mind would put their child in a situation like that, Abby. For all they know, you’re a troubled teen.”

“I’ll let them talk to Grandpa. He’ll convince them I’m harmless.”

“You’ve talked to your grandfather about this?”

“No. But he’d do it. I know you won’t.”

Her mother took the wadded-up tissue in her hand and dabbed her eyes. “I know you’re not a dangerous person, but Ella’s parents don’t know that. And I think Dixie would agree with me that searching for a child who looks like your sister on the off chance it might be her isn’t healthy—for you or Ella. And it won’t work anyway. After Ella, it would be someone else.”

“That’s not fair.” Abby’s eyes burned with indignation. “I have a strong connection to her I can’t explain.”

“She isn’t your sister.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do know that!” Mama’s quivering voice wasn’t convincing.

“Well, I don’t. Can’t you just leave me alone and let me figure it out for myself?”

Kate buried her face in her hands. Finally she looked up and held Abby’s gaze. “I don’t suppose it would do me any good to forbid you to do this?”

Abby looked out at the hummingbird feeder attached to the window. “Mama, all I want to do is find Ella. You don’t have to worry that I’m going to fall into some deep depression if she turns out to be the daughter of that man and woman she was with.”

“And what if you can’t find her?”

Abby shrugged. “Then that’s just the way it is.”

A long moment of silence made Abby shift in her chair. It was hard to tell if her mother was angry or just thinking.

“I’ll make you a deal,” Mama said. “I won’t get in the way of your looking for Ella if you agree to go talk to Dixie—willingly and with an open mind.”

“It’s a waste of money.”

“It’s my money, Abby. I’ll make the appointment. Deal or not?”

“Deal.”