Knotted Roots

Chapter FIVE



The next week went by in a similar fashion. I spent my days sleeping in, reading on the couch, and then retreating to my room as soon as Grandma got home. She hadn’t made any more attempts at drawing me out at night, which was a relief. I was beginning to get cabin fever though, which was really bad for someone like me. I was used to being on the go at all times, spending every day with friends.

I spoke to my parents a couple of times throughout the week, but all of our conversations were awkward, filled with long silences. I didn’t bother to ask if I could come home. What was the point? They mentioned that a few friends had stopped by since I had left, and I assured them that I was keeping in touch (which I wasn’t). They kept saying that this was temporary. I still wasn’t sure if they meant where I was at, or what they were doing.

I heard Grandma leave again this morning, but this time my curiosity was piqued. I wondered what she did every day, and who she did it with. I knew she was at the farm, with those beautiful brothers, but what did they do all day? Did they sit around a table at lunch and pretend that life was perfect? Did they ever wonder where I was at that exact time? Probably not. Grandma had given up wondering about me days ago.

I decided that today was a good day to go for a walk. I had no idea where I would go, but anywhere was better than here. I put on my professionally frayed jean skirt, along with my light blue Gucci tank top, and then pulled my hair up in a messy bun. After I slipped my feet into a pair of wedges, I grabbed my cell phone and dashed out of the house.

I walked out to the main road and started in the direction I hoped would lead me to town. The trees that I had loved so much when we first got here were even more breathtaking than before. There was something so serene about their presence. I felt calm and free as I lifted my eyes to the sky. The sun’s rays were peeking through, creating a splendid pattern of light and dark on the asphalt beneath my feet.

An hour later I finally found what I had been looking for. My feet were tired and throbbing, but I kept going. I began to second guess my decision to wear my wedges, and the throbbing pain in my right ankle seemed to reinforce that assessment. It seemed that my life was filled with those a lot, especially lately. I found a bench on the side of the road, right in front of Mel’s Hardware, and sat down. I kicked off my shoes and wiggled my toes in the air. I had no idea how I would make it back to the house in those shoes.

As I sat there I watched as people went about their daily lives, smiles plastered on their faces as if they didn’t have a care in the world. If only I could be that carefree. No one’s life was perfect, and I wasn’t delusional enough to think that theirs were, but it didn’t stop me from feeling a tiny bit jealous of their happiness. The sound of a door slamming behind me caused my head to jerk in the direction, finding a familiar face standing there, bags in hand.

I hadn’t seen Brian since that night at the diner and I had forgotten how good looking he was. Dressed in his work clothes, dirt covered him from head to toe, but he still looked good. Nowhere near as enticing as Chase, but good looking in his own right. He smiled at me and approached where I was sitting. I smiled back before turning my head towards the road, slipping my feet back into my shoes. He sat down beside me and I caught the scent of sweat and patchouli.

“Roxanne, right?” he asked as he looked at me, that smile holding firm.

“Roxie,” I replied, not meeting his eyes.

“Sorry. Roxie,” he said. “Whatcha doing out here?”

“Baking cookies,” I replied with a laugh. He laughed with me, which was a good sign.

“Sounds delicious. Let me know how that works out for ya,” he replied as he stood up. “Need a ride home?”

“No,” I shook my head as I spoke. “I’m just taking a break before I get back to exploring this fine town you have here.”

“How will you get back home?” he asked, concern lined his face.

“The same way I got here. Walk.”

“That’s quite a long walk. You sure you don’t want a ride?”

“And miss out on all the sights in this bustling metropolis? Never,” I said with a mocking tone.

“Well, I’ve got some time before I have to get back to work. Want a tour?” he asked as he set his bag down on the ground.

“Wouldn’t want to keep you from anything.”

“I don’t have to be back at Betty’s for another hour or so. Come on, let me show you around. It would kill me if you got lost your first time alone in town. Besides, it’s inbred in me to adhere to the Southern hospitality guidelines.”

I really was tired, so I agreed to let him show me around. We walked to his truck around the corner to put his bag up and then we made our way back to Main Street. From where I stood there wasn’t much to see, meaning this would be over quickly. He pointed out every store that we passed by and gave me a heads up as to which ones to avoid. Evidently the Waffle House at the end of the street was a breeding ground for roaches. The thought alone made me gag and I swore, right then and there, to never go in.

When we got to the end of the street I had seen pretty much everything that the town had to offer. It shocked me that there was so little to do here. I mean, even small towns had something for young people to do, right?

“So, no movie theater. No mall. No nail salon. What the hell am I supposed to do here?” I asked him as we walked back to his truck.

“Well, we’re about an hour away from the beach. Does that count?” he replied with a half-smile. I hadn’t meant to offend him, but I was truly in shock that there wasn’t more to do.

“Really? That close? Hmmm....maybe I can talk Grandma into letting me borrow the truck,” I replied, hope finally blossoming within me.

He laughed loudly and then struggled to get himself back under control. “Good luck with that. Betty doesn’t let anyone drive that truck.”

I shrugged and kept walking. He obviously didn’t know how persuasive I could be when I really wanted something. That’s how I convinced Dad to buy me that Prada purse a couple of months earlier. All I had to do was bat my eyes and he was putty in my hands. I had been taught by my mother, a master of manipulation.

When we reached his truck he opened my door for me with a gentlemanly bow, causing me to laugh, loudly. He smiled and chuckled then closed the door, shaking his head all the way to the other side. Once we were on the road back to the house he spoke again.

“Did you want to head to the farm with me? Or back to Betty’s?”

“The house, please. I’m hoping to avoid that stink pit for as long as possible,” I replied, turning to look at him. My words caused a frown to mar his face. “Nothing against anyone who works there. It’s just not for me.”

“Ya know, just cause you say no offense, doesn’t mean someone won’t take offense,” he replied, his eyes never leaving the road. “You really have no interest in finding out what makes Betty tick? What she loves the most in this world?”

I ignored him and turned my attention to the road as well. Of course I wanted to see what the farm was like, but how could I go there and watch as she carefully tended to her precious farm? It’s crazy to feel jealous of a place, but deep down I had a lot of resentment for that plot of land. It had been Grandma’s excuse as to why she could never come visit us in New York. At least, that’s what I had been told.

The farm had meant more to her than my mother or me. And for that reason I hated the farm. I had no reason to go there. Well...other than the idea of seeing Chase again. Just the thought of him brought butterflies to my stomach and caused my cheeks to flame. I glanced over at Brian who was still oblivious. Thank goodness he hadn’t been privy to my inner-most thoughts. I could just imagine him telling Chase all about my sordid thoughts and daydreams. I hadn’t even spoken a word to him and yet his face was always there, taunting me.

He dropped me off at home a few minutes later. I thanked him for the ride and the tour, and then quickly made my way into the house. My feet screamed at me as I slipped off my shoes, demanding a nice soak in the tub. I grabbed a book from the bookshelf and made my way upstairs. As soon as I was submerged in the tub my cell phone began to ring. I dried off my hands and grabbed it from the nearby counter, quickly answering the unknown number.

“Hello?”

“Roxie? It’s Brian. Betty wanted me to tell you that she won’t be home for dinner tonight. She’s taking everyone to the diner instead,” he spoke quickly, the twang in his voice making it hard to understand.

“Umm...okay. Can you ask her to bring me something home?” I replied, the disappointment evident in my voice.

“Sure thing,” he replied and hung up quickly.

I stared at the phone for a moment, and then dropped it back on the counter. Let them go eat dinner together and enjoy each other’s company. It didn’t bother me. Not one single bit. Well...maybe a little bit. Why hadn’t they invited me to go with them? I mean, Grandma was supposed to be taking care of me, right? So why did she not even bother to include me in her dinner plans? Maybe it was time for me to stop wallowing in my own anger and pain.

I’m not saying that I wanted to become a full-time laborer for her on the farm, but maybe I could at least go there and help a little bit. Nothing too strenuous though considering there wasn’t a nail salon anywhere near here. I had spent too much money on these beautiful nails to let them be ruined by hard labor. I closed my eyes and dunked my head underwater, my mind wandering as I relaxed. Later. I would deal with all of this later.