Heart

Glad Mickey wasn’t insisting on a post-mortem of the night before, I threw a bag at him and started selecting the clothes I was going to take home with me.

By the time I was on the train to Birmingham, I had decided to email my personal tutor and ask to transfer out of any non-core classes I shared with Garrett. I preferred the American Studies part of my degree, ironic as that was, and was sure I could pick up credits on that part of my course. I was also going to arm myself with an attack alarm, just in case. I was not going to let him bully me into leaving.

Decisions made, I took a bag of Minstrels from my bag and opened up my Kindle. The next couple of hours were spent completely Garrett-free in the world of Sky and Holder. Heaven.

I got off the train and went to find the departures board to see where my connection was leaving from. Stood underneath the monitor were Cass and Flynn, huge grins plastered on their faces.

“Surprise!” Of course, the hugs I got from them both were enough to make me cry and, bags now in Flynn’s hands, we made our way to the car park.

“We’re driving home anyway, so I thought we’d surprise you.” God, I missed Cass. Even though we still spoke regularly, it just wasn’t the same as being with her. Face to face.

“I’ve missed you so bloody much,” I said, gripping her arm tightly.

“We’ve missed you, too. But we’ve now got a whole weekend together, haven’t we?”

Cass sat with me in the back of Flynn’s car for the journey home and I brought her up to date with everything other than Garrett. I didn’t want to tell her about what had happened in front of Flynn and knew there would be plenty of time for that later. We dropped Cass off at her house with the promise of spending time together the following day. I moved to the front seat and played around with the stereo, eventually finding something decent on the radio.

“So, you’re okay, then? You know, since Jake and everything.” I should have known my nosey-but-lovely big brother wouldn’t be able to leave the topic alone.

“Yeah, I’m fine. You and Cass?” I hoped he would feel uncomfortable talking about his relationship with his little sister. I was wrong.

“It’s fucking amazing, Neve. Seriously. I never thought it could be this good. I love her. She loves me. I don’t care about anything else. There isn’t anything else.”

“Oh, my frickin’ God! Where has my brother gone? Someone has kidnapped him and put a soppy, romantic imposter in his place!”

“Take the piss as much as you want. I don’t care. I’ve never been happier. I’ve got everything I want.” There was a short pause before he continued, his voice slightly deeper. “That’s why we’re worried about you. I’m worried about you. It looked like you and Jake had got the same thing going on.”

“Tell that to him. You’re preaching to the choir here.”

“He’s not happy, you know. He knows he fucked up.”

“Well, he should have thought about it before he opened his mouth, shouldn’t he? Maybe he does know this has all been the biggest mistake he’s ever made, but that doesn’t make it any less wrong. He hurt me, Flynn. He broke me.”

We had pulled onto the drive and were just sat in the car, both of us looking through the windscreen, unable to look at each other and maintain the seriousness of the conversation.

“I know that and, trust me, I’ve made sure he knows it, as well. But he’s broken himself in the process, too. He’s a mess.” I was unsure whether it was what I wanted to hear. My love for him was still significant enough to eclipse the anger, and I hated the idea of him hurting, alone.

“Do you think I should give him another chance?”

“I’m not sure you’ll get to. He still believes it was the right thing for you, even if it’s killing him inside.”

“How do you know all of this? I thought guys didn’t talk about touchy-feely stuff?” So, that may have been a bit stereotypical, but did they really spend as long talking about girls as we did about them?

“He’s my best mate, Neve. I don’t need him to tell me every single detail. I can see it. We’ve had a bit of a chat about it, but it’s more just seeing what he’s like at the moment. You’re my kid sister and I hate that he’s hurt you, and I can’t believe I’m even thinking of letting him be within a hundred metres of you again, but he needs you. And I think you need him.” Fuck. I knew that Jake must be in a state for Flynn to be this open, this serious.

“Did you call me your kid sister? I’m a fully-grown woman, I’ll have you know.” I opened the door and got out, knowing there wasn’t much more which could be said. It was up to me or Jake now.

Nicola Hudson's books