Fairy Godmothers, Inc

TWENTY-SIX



Heroes and Fairy Godmothers


Even though she knew it was coming, Kate couldn’t help but tense at the word “arrest.” No matter how much she trusted Jon, she hadn’t left him a lot to work with.

The queen, however, was having none of it. She shot up from her throne, face blazing with royal fury. “How dare you speak that way of a princess-to-be? You’re the one who should be arrested!”

Bubbles swung a sharp look at the queen, dipping into a low bow as her instincts for dealing with upper management finally started to take over. “You don’t want this woman as a daughter-in-law, Your Majesty. She’s an employee of Fairy Godmothers, Inc. who has stolen valuable company property.” She glanced at Kate, rage flickering in the depths of her eyes. “She’s nothing more than a common thief.”

“A thief?” The queen’s brow lowered as she looked at her son. “Worse, a common one? I know that ridiculous Lady Marian ran off with some sort of highwayman, but a prince certainly can’t indulge in such nonsense.”

“I certainly can.” Jon’s voice was easy, but pitched to catch the crowd’s attention. When they turned to him, he stepped forward and gently tugged Kate with him. “Her true love was being tormented by the effects of a wicked spell, and she stole the item needed to set me free. It’s a nearly textbook definition of a quest, and as such, everything Kate did in the last forty-eight hours is covered by questing law. She’s a hero, not a thief.” He smiled, absolutely certain, and Kate tried valiantly to look as relaxed and confident as he was. “The fact that the shoe fit merely confirms that she is, indeed, my true love.”

Bubbles’ expression remained triumphant. “That’s a lovely story, Your Highness, but Fairy Godmothers are exempt from questing law. Since she was legally employed by the company during the commission of her crime, that particular argument is useless.”

Jon’s eyes narrowed as he gripped Kate’s hand tighter. “You’re lying.”

“I’m not. It’s stated quite plainly on page three hundred and eighty-seven of the Fairy Godmothers, Inc. employee contract.” Bubbles’ smile was evil. “You were told to read the entire document before you signed it, Kate. Apparently, your unwillingness to follow simple instruction is finally coming back to haunt you.”

Both the king and queen were now staring at Jon with lowered brows. “Why didn’t you tell me you were under a wicked spell?” the queen asked, warning in her voice. She turned to her husband. “Did he tell you he was under a wicked spell?”

“There. Was. No. Wicked. Spell,” Bubbles insisted, glaring at Jon’s parents as if she could make them agree with her by sheer force of will. “It was merely a misunder—”

The queen’s righteous indignation swelled as she glared right back at Bubbles. “I should think my son can be trusted to know whether or not he was under a wicked spell!”

“Thankfully, that’s not the issue we’re dealing with at present.” Bubbles gritted her teeth, a muscle visibly working in her jaw by the time she turned back to Jon. “I’m tired of playing games. Even if you stop my security force from taking her away, I can call the city police to arrest her. I have mirror video of her committing the crime, which is sufficient evidence to convince them. You have no legal right to stop me.”

Lawton moved forward to stand next to Kate. “My dear,” he murmured low enough for Bubbles not to overhear, “we really do have to teach you how to be a better thief.”

She could tell he was trying to be comforting, but it wouldn’t work this time. Jon’s jaw was tense with fury, but Kate recognized that terrible lost look in his eyes from the night of the ball. She was leaving him again, and for once, he couldn’t rewrite reality fast enough to stop it.

“I can have my lawyer file a motion of delay,” Jon said, glaring at Bubbles. “That way, you can’t arrest her until they’ve had time to review the case.”

“And how long will that buy her? Hours? Maybe a day at most? If you start the legal game, Your Highness, rest assured that Fairy Godmothers, Inc. will finish it.” Bubbles turned to Kate. “You’ve lost. Let him go now, or I’ll drag his name through the mud right along with yours.”

Kate’s heart clenched. No matter how much she hated it, Bubbles was right. Grandstanding now would only ending up hurting the people she wanted to protect. “It’s okay, Jon,” she said quietly, deliberately turning away from the other woman. “Let her call the police. I’ve never been arrested before, but it will probably be easier if I go quietly.”

“No.” Jon’s attention snapped to Kate, anger and desperation in his eyes. “I don’t care what they do. I’m not letting you go.”

“Sadly, I agree with Katharine.” Lawton’s voice was low. “You know we’ll get her out, Jon, even if we have to plan a brilliantly complicated jailbreak to do it.”

“No jailbreaks.” Kate gave Lawton a firm look, then focused on Jon. It wasn’t exactly a happy ending, but saving him had been enough. She could take whatever else came.

At least she didn’t have to deal with it all on her own. “Just take care of everyone for me, and please get me a good lawyer.” Kate didn’t mention Ned’s name, knowing that Bubbles had enough evidence to get him arrested, too. Hopefully, he had the good sense to stay out of sight. “I’ll be fine. I promise.”

“I won’t be.” Jon’s grip was tight enough now to cut off circulation. “Let me do this, Kate.”

“I stole those patches so Fairy Godmothers, Inc. would stop hurting you. I’m not about to start doing things differently now.” Throat tightening, Kate touched his face. A love potion couldn’t even begin to duplicate everything she was feeling right now. “I’m not leaving you, Jon. I’m just going to be busy for a little while.”

“We’ll get you out,” Jon vowed, kissing her hand. The desperation hadn’t left his eyes, and Kate suspected her “no jailbreaks” edict was going to be overruled.

“They can try,” Bubbles cut in, sounding so pleased with herself Kate was surprised she wasn’t cackling. “While you were having your little moment, I used my mirror to call the police. And once they have you, rest assured Fairy Godmothers, Inc. will bury you so deeply you’ll never see sunlight again.”

The words snapped something inside Kate. Bubbles had dictated her life for so long, but Kate refused to let the woman think she had the power to touch what really mattered. “You know what? I don’t care.” She turned back to Bubbles, letting go of Jon’s hand and stalking toward the other woman. “I spent my whole career keeping my head down while I tried to do the best I could in a bad situation. Even when the rules weren’t right, I pretended to follow them because what else was I supposed to do? That stupid job was all I had.”

The guards, who had a decent sense of the dramatic, moved aside so Kate could stand almost nose-to-nose with Bubbles. “But people are more important than rules, and I would steal a dragon’s hoard if it would keep these people safe. I would certainly go to jail to keep them safe. If I had to, I would bring the entire company down around your ears to keep them safe.”

Resentment flashed in Bubbles’ eyes. “They’ll forget about you in a second.”

“We really won’t.” Jon’s voice was steel as he moved to stand beside Kate. “Rest assured, Fairy Godmothers, Inc. has made a lifelong enemy.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Bubbles glared at them both, refusing to back down. “The justice system will be on my side, not yours. Fairy Godmothers, Inc. hasn’t broken any laws.”

“What about ethics violations?” Everyone turned at the highly unexpected sound of the king’s voice. He cringed a little under the sheer weight of all the attention suddenly focused on him, but he pushed ahead. “I know the Council of High Sorcery gets really upset when magic is used outside of the rules. If Fairy Godmothers, Inc. is using evil spells, won’t the council have something to say about it?” When everyone just kept staring at him, he shrugged. “What? Like I said, I pay attention.”

“That’s nonsense,” Bubbles snapped. “I keep trying to tell you, we don’t use evil spells!”

“But you do use compulsion spells, which is close enough that a sufficiently clever lawyer should be able to persuade a jury,” Lawton said, moving to stand on Kate’s other side. “And one thing we do have in surplus here is clever lawyers.”

“Curses aren’t illegal.” The frustration in Bubbles’ voice was soothing. Kate knew she was still going to get arrested, but at least Bubbles wouldn’t get to enjoy it.

“Unauthorized curses are.” Now that he had a new angle to work, Jon’s voice sounded more controlled. “My guess is that none of you are licensed evil sorceresses, who are the only people legally allowed to use curses or compulsion magic. Given how many years you’ve been operating, I can only imagine how many times the company has broken that particular law.”

Bubbles looked horrified. “We’re not evil sorceresses!”

“Which is the exact reason the council will be so annoyed with you.” Lawton almost sounded cheerful. “We won’t even need to bother with destroying you in court. The council will do that for us.”

“And even if you did get licensed, where would that leave the company?” Kate’s smile had absolutely no humor in it. “No one wants their children or grandchildren in a marriage arranged by an evil sorceress. What would the neighbors think?”

Before Bubbles could answer, the ballroom doors opened to reveal several very confused members of the local police force being guided inside. They paled a little when faced with most of the royal family, but their leader was resolute. “I’m Captain Green, and I’ve been told there’s a thief on the premises.”

Kate sighed, holding out her wrists. “That’s me.”

Next to her, Jon tensed. “Did she show you any evidence?”

The Captain actually looked apologetic. “Ms. Bubbles here mirrored us the video she had of the theft. I’m not sure what’s happening here, but the case looks pretty open and shut.”

“It is,” Bubbles said, the distraction having given her time to collect herself. Hate shone out of her eyes as she glared at Kate. “It doesn’t matter what nonsense story about curses and evil spells you tell these people. You can’t prove any of it, and no one will listen to a useless little nobody like you.”

Kate lifted her chin as one of the officers put the cuffs on her. “It doesn’t matter. I still have no regrets about what I did.”

Bubbles looked disgusted. “Does that idiocy actually comfort you?”

Next to Kate, Jon was talking to the Captain. “Let me come with her to the station. I’ll have her lawyer meet us there.”

Behind her, Kate heard the queen’s voice. “Jon, you’ll do no such thing. You can’t be seen at a police station!”

“Why not?” Lawton asked the queen. “Your elder son is quite a familiar guest there.”

The sound of running footsteps immediately distracted Kate away from the rest of the argument. She looked over Bubbles’ shoulder to see Ned and Rellie running into the room, with Ned frantically waving his fist in the air.

Kate was confused for a second—she had thought both of them were still behind her—then, panic hit and she tried to catch one of their gazes. She couldn’t gesture at them to run because Bubbles would see it, but maybe she could glare them both back out of the room. Ned might think he was trying to help, but the last thing Kate wanted was for him to go to jail with her.

Sadly, Ned didn’t seem to be in agreement with this plan. “I have it!” he shouted.

Everyone’s attention immediately turned to him. At the sight of the wayward intern, fresh indignation lit Bubbles’ eyes. “Arrest him, too! He’s her co-conspirator!”

The police moved toward Ned, and Rellie stepped in front of him as if she could shield her sweetheart. “Not yet. He’s got something to say.”

Ned, not looking nearly as worried as Kate thought he should be, turned to Captain Green. “Could you arrest Bubbles for illegal sorcery if you had proof she was using a compulsion spell on people?”

The police captain turned to Bubbles. “Are you a licensed evil sorceress?” Bubbles looked insulted. “Don’t be absurd. I’m a Fairy Godmother.”

“Then, yes, I could arrest her.” He turned back to Ned. “But I’d need clear evidence, young man. Without an open case, we can’t arrest someone just on witness testimony alone.”

Ned grinned, opening his hand just enough to reveal Kate’s bottle of True Love. She’d taken it off when she’d changed out of her uniform, and had completely forgotten about it. “Here it is. Bubbles hands these out to all the Fairy Godmothers who work under her.” Ned showed the captain the bottom of the bottle, where the company logo was clearly embossed.

“It’s a company-issued love potion,” Jon explained, giving Bubbles a single withering glance. “I was recently dosed with it against my will, and I would be happy to testify about the way it held my mind hostage and made me betray the people I care about most. Kate’s ‘theft’ was to steal the cure so that Rellie and I would be free of its effects.”

“It’s true,” Rellie added. “It made me feel all kinds of creepy things I didn’t want to.”

Captain Green looked graver and graver as they spoke. “I still need proof that this is a compulsion spell, but I can’t test it on anyone in case you’re right.”

“They’re all lying.” Bubbles seized on the opportunity. “They knew you wouldn’t feel comfortable about testing it, so they’re trying to pass off a mere bottle of perfume as magic.”

Kate smiled. “If it’s just perfume, you won’t mind getting spritzed with some.” She held her cuffed hands out for the bottle, and when Ned gave it to her she pointed the spray nozzle at Bubbles. “Come closer. Let’s see what this perfume of yours smells like.”

Bubbles froze. “No. I refuse.”

The captain watched Bubbles with growing suspicion. “If it’s just perfume, you shouldn’t mind getting some on you. Let her spray you with it.”

“No.” Pure fear filled Bubbles’ face now. She took a step back. “You can’t make me.”

“Why not?” Kate let all her anger out into her voice. “You made Jon and Rellie.”

For a second, no one moved. Then the captain nodded. “Fair enough. If you could put that thing away?” When Kate handed the bottle to one of the other officers, Captain Green stepped forward and unlocked her cuffs. “Even if she is a licensed evil sorceress and is just lying about it, that’s definitely enough to get a case started. I take it you’d be willing to testify for the prosecution?” “Absolutely,” Kate said, rubbing her wrists. “Ned will as well.”

“Then I think we can overlook the theft charges.” Captain Green looked at both her and Jon. “I hate to say this, but you’ll need to stay where we can contact you.”

“She’ll be right here,” Jon said, taking Kate’s hand again. “We’ll cooperate with anything you need.”

“We’ll even offer some assistance with interrogations, if you wish,” Lawton added. “I know a few gentlemen who can be quite persuasive.”

“Thank you, but I think we’ll be fine,” the captain said wryly. Then he turned to Bubbles. “You’re under arrest for the unlicensed casting of curses and other related spells.”

As he continued reading her rights, Bubbles looked at him in horror. “You can’t do this!” Her glare shot to Kate. “I’ll get you for this!”

Lawton cocked an ear. “Surely there should be some dramatic music any moment now.” After a moment, he shook his head. “Such a missed opportunity.”

Captain Green gestured to his men. “Take her away.” Jon nodded at the palace guards to follow them out. The security guards Bubbles had brought with her took the opportunity to make their own escape.

Once they were gone, Jon walked over and pulled Ned into a bear hug. “I could kiss you.”

Rellie grinned. “Sorry, that’s my job.”

Kate just stood there, still reeling from the sudden turn of events. “You mean everything worked out?”

“Well, you’ll probably have to suffer through several terribly dull days of court cases, but I do believe they at least allow the witnesses refreshments.” When she didn’t laugh, Lawton’s expression turned sympathetic. “Cheer up, Katharine. We won.”

“And you were magnificent,” Jon added, pulling her into his arms. He held on tight, burying his face in her hair. “My hero.”

She hugged him back just as hard, feeling tears prick. “I finally had something worth fighting for.”

Rellie threw her arms around both of them. “That was so cool!” She laughed, squeezing them tight. “You and Jon totally have to start that company so I can be a Fairy Godmother just like you are.”

Ned came up to add himself to the hug. “You did good, Boss,” he told Kate.

She moved her arm so it was around him as well. “So did you. You got over your fear of True Love.”

“No, I didn’t.” Ned pulled away at the same time Rellie did, and a second later the two of them were holding onto each other. “But like you said, some things are more important.”

“I am vastly impressed with all of us, which means this is a perfect opportunity for us all to celebrate our mutual magnificence,” Lawton said, turning to look for a convenient page. “I’m sure they have some sherry tucked away somewhere.”

“Jon, don’t be absurd.” The queen swept forward, looking upset. “You can’t get us involved in a court case! Fairy Godmothers and evil sorceresses are both part of the service industry!”

“I can, and I will,” Jon said firmly. “And she’s going to be your future daughter-in-law, so you might as well get used to the idea.”

“We’re going to open a fairy godmothering company together,” Rellie chimed in. “If Kate still has her wand, she can make you all kinds of neat dresses.”

The queen looked as appalled, and Kate made a mental note to figure out some way to distract Rellie from that particular idea.

Then Ned spoke up. “Can I get a job there, too? I don’t think I’m ready to be out in the field just yet, but I could do office work until I am.”

“I’m sure we’ll have a place for everyone once the details get worked out,” Jon said. When Kate smacked him on the arm, he grinned at her. “Face it. Marrying me and starting a company is your destiny.”

She sighed. “You’re all going to make me crazy.”

Lawton chuckled. “And you’ll enjoy every minute of it.”

The queen’s skirt moved in a way that suggested she’d stomped her foot. “I refuse to let my son marry a member of the service industry. I’m sorry, my dear, but a princess can’t be a Fairy Godmother.”

“Even when that would also make her a fairy princess?” Jon said, gesturing to Kate’s wings.

The frustration melted out of the queen’s expression. “We’ve never had a fairy princess in the family . . .”

Before the queen could get too many ideas, a little girl suddenly appeared from between two people and dove beneath the edge of her skirt. The queen jumped, frantically trying to lift the layers of fabric hiding the child from view. “Jonathan, I’m certain I didn’t approve my gown being used as play equipment!”

Kate and Jon grinned at each other, then she pulled out of his arms to crouch down in front of the queen. “If I may, Your Majesty?” She lifted several layers of skirt just far enough to reveal the curly-haired child, who giggled at being discovered.

Jon leaned forward. “Hide and seek, I presume?”

Just as the girl nodded, a much taller figure burst through the crowd. “Lucy, I told you you’re not supposed to go . . .” The voice trailed off, and the little girl dashed off again as everyone else looked up at the suddenly frozen Rupert.

He stared at his mother. “Um . . . hi?”

The queen’s eyes widened with delight. “You’re back from questing! Oh, darling, this is wonderful! I have so much to talk to you about . . .”

Panicked, Rupert glanced over at Jon, then sketched a quick bow to his mother before turning and disappearing back into the crowd.

The queen’s eyes narrowed again as she whirled on her youngest son. “Jonathan, explain.”

Jon sighed, and Kate smothered a laugh as she put a consoling arm around his shoulders. “It’s a long story.”



ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

There’s no one waiting to cut to commercial, but I’d still better keep this short. Jolly Fish Press, thank you so much for giving me this chance. Mom, thank you for reading all eighteen versions of this story and having intelligent things to say about every one of them. I know you would have read eighteen more.

My fellow authors, thank you for the much-needed advice and camaraderie. Rachel, thank you for co-plotting and doing all the ridiculous things I asked when I needed someone to help me block scenes. And to my online readers (you know who you are), thank you for helping me grow the seed of this into something more. Your interest kept me going.





About the Author

Jenniffer Wardell is the arts, entertainment, and lifestyle reporter for The Davis Clipper. She’s the winner of several awards from the Utah Press Association and the Utah Headliners Chapter of the Society of Professional Journalists.

Wardell currently lives in Salt Lake City, Utah.