CHAPTER 31
CERYS
Ella appears with a towel and her swimming costume in her arms. “Where’s Daddy taking you?” I ask.
“He said we’d go to the beach today.”
“Lucky you,” I say and help her push the blue towel and bright pink costume into her bag.
“He said I’d need something for the car because it’s a long way to the beach.”
I know how much Ella whines when we take a ten-minute trip across town to see her grandmother, so a few miles to the beach will be enough for her. “Maybe a book then?”
Ella wanders off and returns with her Peppa Pig book and the Olaf that Liam bought her for Christmas.
“Do you think Daddy will remember to get you some snacks to take?” I ask.
“He said he’ll buy me some sweets and ice-creams.”
“Healthy snacks,” I mutter and pull out some raisins. I package Ella a small box of fruits and crackers, and then put them in her bag.
Craig arrives on time for once, and I grit my teeth as Ella rushes to him and he scoops her up.
“Wow, my little girl’s getting heavy!”
“I’m not little!” she protests.
He sets her on the floor and I pass Craig the bag. “She says you’re going to the beach?”
“Yeah, Barry. I want to make it a full day so we might be a bit later home.”
“How late?”
“Dunno, I’ll call you.” He pauses. “This would all be easier if you let her stay over with me.”
“I’m not talking to you about this now.”
“I want to sleep at Daddy’s!”
“See!” he says.
“You’re the one being unreasonable. If you really don’t trust me, we could stay at my mum’s.”
“I don’t want to stay there,” says Ella and I attempt not to laugh.
Craig frowns at his backfired attempt at manipulating Ella, and then arches his neck to look behind me. “Uncle Liam not here today?” he asks snidely.
“No.”
“Are you still together?”
“None of your business, Craig.”
“Oh, you know it is, Cerys.”
I glance back at Ella who’s now hopping up and down the steps. “I put some snacks in for her in case she gets hungry on the way to Barry and her coat is in there, too.”
“Coat? It’s twenty-five degrees.”
“It might cool down later.”
Craig shakes his head and turns to his daughter. “Okay, say goodbye to Mummy.”
I bend down and Ella wraps her arms around my neck, kissing my cheek. “Bye, bye, Mummy.”
“Enjoy the beach,” I say and pull my fingers through her ponytail as she walks away.
Craig leads Ella down the path and fastens her into his red Ford sedan. He opens the driver door, and then pauses. “You do know I’m better for Ella than he is, right?”
“You’re her dad.” I reply and he can take that however he likes. “Keep her safe.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll look after her.” He pauses and taps the car window as if he has something else to say.
The guy I fell in love with years ago looks back at me. I will always be reminded of him when I look at Ella as they share the thick-lashed brown eyes that captivate. She’s a beautiful little girl and he is part of the reason why. Craig struggled with parenthood more than me as he refused to grow up, but we made the decision to raise Ella together when I got pregnant. He deserves to spend time with his daughter, but Craig needs to bring logic into the situation and demonstrate to me he’s committed to her. Christmas still plays on my mind, and even though that was to punish me, he kicked her out, too.
Has our split and Liam’s arrival in our life made him realise how special Ella is to him? Is this the wake-up call he needed? There’s room for all three of us if he drops the hostility, and I’ll do what’s best for Ella even if I have to give more of her than I’d like to Craig. But if he fights ugly, as he is now, so will I. Christmas still haunts me, and Liam suggests I use that against him if we go to court.
“See you later, Cerys,” he says and climbs into the car.
I watch the car disappear down the road, half-relieved Ella is away today so I can have a day to myself.
****
I spend a self-indulgent afternoon lying in the sun reading on my Kindle. It’s not quite the same as lounging by Liam’s pool in LA, but better than running around the house after a five year old. Liam’s been away in London for a few days again and Ella has been full on, boredom from school holidays aggravating her behaviour. For the first time ever, I’m relieved Craig has taken her for a few hours.
Losing track of time in the long summer days, I’m surprised to see it’s 7 p.m. Will Ella need anything to eat when she gets back? Probably not, she’ll be full of junk food. I wander into the house and pick up my phone to call Craig.
“Craig, what time will you be back with Ella?” I ask.
“Not sure, I’m driving now.” He’s on speaker phone and Ella calls ‘hello’ in the background.
“An hour? Two hours? It’s getting late.”
“It’s school holidays, late bedtimes don’t matter!”
Yeah, you don’t have the moody child tomorrow. “Are you on your way?”
“Yes. We might stop off to eat. How about I say we’ll be back by nine?”
I clench my teeth, but what can I do? “Fine.” Ella calls something from the back but it’s hard to hear what she’s saying. “See you soon, Ella. Be a good girl for Daddy!”
Looks like my peaceful day is longer than I expected. I curl up on the sofa with a plate of lasagne balanced on my knee as I text Liam.
<You coming over tomorrow?> I ask him.
<Yeah. Working late tonight but a few days free after. Wanna go somewhere?>
<Maybe.>
<I’m rolling my eyes at you>
<Just be nice to see you again>
There’s a pause in texts for a minute. <Want to do some special Skype-ing later?>
<Now I’m rolling my eyes>
<Please? I’m giving you puppy dog eyes>
<Later. Maybe. I’m eating and waiting for a tired, grumpy Ella. I’ll call you later, after she gets home>
<I love you>
<You too>
The bottle of white wine in the fridge empties as I watch old movies and wait for Ella. Halfway through Marley and Me, I drift to sleep, Liam creeping into my dreams. I wake to my phone ringing again.
“Craig?”
“No, Liam.” He sounds put out. “Why did you think I was Craig?”
“He’s not here yet.”
“Oh. Okay. I’ve been waiting for you to call me. If she’s not home I’ll call back later.” The tone of his voice suggests he doesn’t want me to hang up.
I squint at the numbers on the DVD player display. “Shit, it’s ten o’clock. Where is he?”
“Being an awkward bastard probably.”
A shiver trips across my neck and down my spine. He’s never late, not this late. “I’ll call him. Speak to you soon.”
There’s no reply from Craig.
On the tenth voicemail in an hour, the uncomfortable prickling morphs into a stabbing anxiety. I call Marcella. “Is Craig there?”
“Craig? No, why would he be here?”
“I thought he might’ve dropped by with Ella to see you. He took her out today.”
“I haven’t seen him this week, sorry.”
Our conversations were never anything outside of polite, once me and Craig split. Since the custody issue arose, the cool in my exchanges with Marcella have descended into full-blown frozen so it’s impossible to tell if she’s hiding anything from me.
“He’s not answering his phone. Can you try? He might answer if it’s not me,” I ask as calmly as I can manage.
“I’ll call you back.”
An hour later, she hasn’t.