Chapter Thirteen
She’d Like It a F*ckuva Lot
Jake opened his eyes and saw white ceiling and white cornices.
But he felt Josie’s hair all over his chest and shoulder, her cheek on his pec, her arm around his gut, the warmth of her soft body pressed to his side and the silk of her short nightie on his arm but his hand that was resting on her hip felt nothing but skin.
This was why he smiled.
His eyes caught on the pink of the walls and his mind brought up an image of that room which was almost all flowers, the armchair by the window, the cover on the bed, the toss pillows that were everywhere. The prints didn’t match but it worked in a girlie way that was definitely not him, it wasn’t even Josie, but it was Lydie. There were even faded pictures of flowers in frames on the walls.
With all that pink and all those flowers, it was a wonder his testosterone levels didn’t take a nosedive the instant he entered the room.
Then again, he could get it up for Josie anytime, anyplace. He knew that because he had to fight against getting hard at a f*cking high school football game with just her pressed to his side.
He could definitely do it in a room filled with flowers.
He’d proved that last night.
And now.
He wanted her. He was ready for her. His mind was no longer on flowers but on the red silk nightie she was wearing.
His favorite color was blue but that red nightie was the absolute shit. Josie in it, her long hair down and even wet, her in that nightie was the hottest thing he’d ever seen.
But he’d only had one condom in his wallet. He’d taken her without one in the locker room but until they had the conversation, that was all he was going to take.
Which sucked.
This meant he couldn’t have her again and with the day ahead, he wouldn’t be able to have her until that night.
So they had to have the conversation.
They just wouldn’t be having it now.
Last night, they’d taken a giant leap forward, a f*cking awesome one. Even with that, he wasn’t going to start pushing her now.
To calm his shit down, he was trying not to think of her in that sexy as f*ck dress she wore last night, sitting ringside for him, following him to the locker room, that look on her face, that heat in her pretty blue eyes, when she moved her head slightly on his chest.
He knew by the way it felt she wasn’t moving in her sleep but instead moving in a way she was trying not to wake him so he knew she was awake.
Therefore he tightened his arm around her and rolled them so he was resting partly on her front, partly down her side. He hitched a knee to spread her legs and rested it almost at the heat of her as he lifted his head and looked down at her face.
F*ck.
So f*cking pretty.
Jake slid his hand up her side, over her chest, up her neck and gently spread her hair out, arranging it on the pillow, his eyes watching, and when he got what he wanted, he caught her gaze and whispered, “Mornin’, Slick.”
Her lips tipped up and she whispered back, “Good morning, Jake.”
At the sound of her voice, the feel of her under him, it hit him.
Christ, she was there. Under him. In a nightie. Her hair spread on the pillow. Her hands resting light on his lower back. He’d tasted her sweet p-ssy. He’d f*cked it twice. He’d watched her come in the shower, giving it to her with his fingers. He’d swallowed her whimpers and moans. He’d felt her tighten around him every-f*cking-where.
Ethan’s mom, Sloane had been the best he’d ever had.
Until Josie.
He’d never, not once, not even knowing how good Sloane could give it to him, lost his control like he had in the locker room last night.
And she’d delivered, along for the ride, clutching tight, pressing close, giving in and taking it.
In her bed later wasn’t better, but it was slower, sweeter and he liked the way she took him after he gave it to her.
Clutching tight.
Pressing close.
Holding on.
On this thought, he dipped his head and ran the side of his nose along hers. He felt her body soften further beneath him when he did and he knew in feeling it that he needed to get her ass out of bed, feed her, get her in clothes and get her to his house. If he didn’t, they’d be having the conversation he didn’t want to have yet.
She seemed good but he knew he had to slow shit down. Go gentle. Give her steady. This was a massive shift for her, seeing as she’d missed him going gently but taking them where they were now.
She wanted it, that was obvious. And they were there.
But that didn’t mean he still didn’t have to take it slow.
When he lifted his head, her hands started moving, gliding lightly up his sides then in over his chest, up his neck and at the feel of her touch he knew he seriously needed to get her out of that bed.
Then they slid up his neck and both cupped his jaw but one moved and she ran her thumb gently across the scar on his cheekbone.
“How did you get this?” she asked quietly.
“Bar fight,” he answered also quietly.
She blinked. “Not a fight fight?”
He shook his head.
“You were in a bar fight?” she asked.
He didn’t want to get into this with her, not now. Shit like this was for when she was eating an omelet with him or her ass was in his truck and he was taking her to dinner.
But he’d kept enough from her, the rest he had to give her honestly.
“Donna liked attention,” he told her. “When we started, we’d go out, she had me but she still went for it. A guy gave it to her. I didn’t like that. I made that clear. He was an a*shole. Shit degenerated, both of us spent the night in the tank and I got that scar.”
She didn’t look surprised anymore.
She looked pissed.
It was cute.
And sweet.
“She sought male attention even in your company?” she asked, her melodic voice going hard.
“Yep,” he answered.
Her eyes grew unfocused as she murmured, “I’m beginning to understand Donna.”
“You get to that understanding, babe, you tell me. She’s been confusing my ass for years.”
Her head tipped on the pillow and her hands slid down to his neck, but her face changed and he didn’t like the way it did it.
He understood why when she asked softly, “You still care?”
“Nope, not for me,” he replied. “But two of my kids are her kids and if I get her, I might be able to help them do it. And Ethan isn’t hers but she freaks him out. He knows he’s missin’ somethin’, he just doesn’t know what he’s missin’. He’ll clue in eventually that he doesn’t have a mother and that he doesn’t like the mother his brother and sister have. He’s tight with them and to him, Donna is a wildcard. He might not get it in any real way but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get that she has the power to hurt them and if she suddenly pushed gettin’ the custody she’s supposed to have, he’d lose them every other week. So in a way, I got three kids that are mired in her shit. And because of that, I care.”
“This is why he sidled close to you and me at the game,” she noted.
“That’s why.”
“I believe you and Conner are correct,” she declared. “Donna needs to get her finger out of her ass.”
At those words coming from Josie’s lips, Jake’s body started shaking with the laughter he was fighting against making vocal but he didn’t win the fight against stopping his words from vibrating with it when he agreed, “Yep. Con and me are correct.”
Her face went unfocused again, her eyes drifting over his shoulder and he had a feeling, since she was Lydie’s granddaughter and had demonstrated repeatedly she had no problems wading into a variety of shit, she was thinking about how to force Donna to pull her finger out.
So he stated, “Baby, it’s up to her to do it. It’s up to me to cover my kids as she does it or if she doesn’t.”
She focused on him and murmured a noncommittal, “Indeed.”
Jake stared at her and wondered how a Josie vs. Donna would go.
What he knew in his gut was that Josie would rather bleed herself dry than hurt Amber or Conner so he figured if she found her time to get up in Donna’s face, it would be Donna’s problem and not blow back on his kids.
Still, he said, “Let her work it out.”
“Hmm,” she replied.
His body started shaking again.
She felt it and her eyes narrowed on him. “What’s amusing?”
“You’re cute when you go momma bear.”
Her face arrested but there was a light in her eyes he liked a f*ckuva lot and a tone in her voice he liked even more when she asked breathily, “Momma bear?”
“Yeah, Slick. You layin’ Noah out for Amber. Havin’ Con’s back with his situation. Keepin’ Eath close when Donna’s bein’ her usual clueless. Momma bear.”
She covered quickly but he saw her doing it.
Seeing it he knew it sucked for her in a way he felt deep in his gut, but it didn’t suck for him or his kids, what she was trying to hide.
Way back in the day, she’d wanted kids and had given up that dream. Now, at her age, it wouldn’t be impossible, but it would be difficult and possibly dangerous.
“Well,” she huffed haughtily through her cover. “Someone has to do it.”
She was way f*cking right about that.
“Okay, Slick, lots of things I’d wanna lay on you talkin’ about the morning after I’ve had you for the first time…twice, but Donna isn’t one of them.”
Her face cleared and softened again, as did her voice when she asked, “What do you want to talk about?”
“Talk, not so much,” he stated. He watched her eyes flash, read that too, wished he could give it to her and went on, “Tell you I’m makin’ you breakfast, puttin’ your ass in my truck, gettin’ your car, gettin’ it home and then takin’ you to my place so we can spend the day there with my kids watchin’ football, definitely.”
She didn’t hide her disappointment when she mumbled, “Oh.”
He dipped his face closer and shared, “Had only one condom in my wallet, honey.”
“Oh,” she repeated, still not hiding her disappointment.
“We’ll have that discussion later,” he told her.
“Okay,” she whispered.
“Now, breakfast,” he stated.
“Okay,” she repeated.
“You got a spare toothbrush?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Gran might have one somewhere. I’ll look.”
“Good. You got the coffee ready to switch on?”
“I was, well…occupied with other things last night when I got home.”
He grinned at her and muttered, “Right.” He dipped his head closer again, slid his nose from the curve of her nostril to the tip and, staying close, he said, “You find a toothbrush. I’ll start coffee.”
“All right, Jake. The coffee’s in the fridge.”
“Gotcha.”
He made a move to leave her and was about to touch his mouth to her jaw before doing that when she called, “Jake?”
He lifted his head and caught her gaze. Then he tensed when he caught the look in her eyes.
Shyly, she asked, “This is real, right?”
F*ck him.
Last night, she told him she liked him.
He knew that before she said it.
Right then he knew she really f*cking liked him.
“You think you’re dreamin’, baby?” he asked back.
“Yes,” she whispered.
F*ck.
Him.
“It’s real, Josie,” he promised.
She nodded before she lifted her head and slid her lips from the corner of his mouth across his stubble and pressed them to his jaw, the entire trip he felt in his gut, his dick and burning through his chest.
Not that he had to be reminded but her doing this did the trick.
And yeah.
F*ck yeah.
He really f*cking liked her too.
She dropped her head back to the pillow, her hair again everywhere, and said, “Toothbrush.”
“Yeah,” he muttered, bent and kissed her jaw then moved from the bed thinking that if she wasn’t cool with taking him ungloved, he was buying a f*cking case of condoms and stashing them everywhere so they’d never run out. Her house. Her Cayenne. His truck. His wallet. Her wallet. His workout bag. His office. The club. Her nightstand. His bedroom at home.
Every-f*cking-where.
Dozens of those f*ckers.
He yanked on his training pants and didn’t look back when he exited the room. This was because he’d managed to control his erection and if he saw her in that nightie in her bed with her long blonde hair down, that effort would be wasted.
He was winding his way down the stairs when he stopped dead.
And he stopped dead because he heard someone at the front door and they weren’t knocking or ringing the bell.
As far as he knew, Lydie had given keys to him, Conner, Amber and Ethan. The nursing company that came in and looked after her also had a key. And a couple of her younger friends who could still get around and came to visit her often had them.
None of those people, outside of maybe his kids, would open the door on a Sunday morning before ringing the bell.
And he’d locked it last night. His mind was on Josie but he’d never forget to lock the door to keep her safe and he knew he did.
Slowly, he moved around the landing and had his eyes glued to the door, his steps cautious as he watched a man entering.
That man was not one of his kids, anyone from the nursing company or any of Lydie’s friends.
He had a big black leather bag in his hand like he was staying a while and he was looking into the foyer sneakily.
Jake again stopped on the stairs, crossed his arms on his chest and demanded, “You wanna tell me who the f*ck you are?”
The man’s head jerked around and up. Jake watched his face go slack in shock then his eyes moved over Jake from head to toe and his expression hardened with anger.
“Jake, I presume,” he said, his voice tight.
Jesus.
Was this guy…?
“You know me, I still don’t know you,” Jake stated.
“Henry Gagnon,” the man answered.
Yep. This guy was Josephine’s shit for brains boss.
It was not good the guy was good-looking. It was also not good he was well-dressed. It was further not good that he was clearly fit.
But mostly it was not good that he was there.
“Josie’s boss,” Jake said.
“Yes,” Gagnon replied, his voice still tight. “Josie’s boss and also more.”
“More?” Jake asked.
“Much more,” Gagnon answered and that was when Jake’s body got tight.
Did Lydie not know some of Josie’s history with this guy?
He opened his mouth to say something when Gagnon’s eyes went beyond him and Jake heard Josie cry happily, “Goodness! Henry!”
He twisted to look at her and saw she was still in her nightie, a black silk robe covering it, the robe not tied, and she was racing down the stairs, her face lit up, her eyes shining, her lips smiling.
She skirted him and the only thing that made him feel even minutely better at witnessing her excited reaction to seeing her boss was that she did this in a familiar and intimate way. This meaning she did it putting her hands to his back and stomach to steady herself as she moved by (because he sure didn’t move a f*cking inch to let her pass).
Then she flew the rest of the way down to Gagnon and he watched, his body so tight it felt his tendons would snap, as she lifted her hands to rest them on Gagnon’s chest and got up on her toes, tipping her head back.
Even though it looked like she was moving in for a kiss, or inviting one, Gagnon instantly dropped his bag, put his hands to her waist and shoved her back a foot. He didn’t delay in dropping his hands and moving away from her too, but he took three steps.
Jake descended the rest of the stairs as the air in the room changed and Josie asked with confusion, “What on—?”
But Gagnon cut her off. “This is a f*cking joke.”
Jake moved around her so he could see both of them. He positioned himself not close but not far and again crossed his arms on his chest as Josie asked, “What are you talking about?”
“This,” Gagnon replied, throwing an arm out. “You,” he went on, his arm going her way. “This guy.” He tossed his arm Jake’s way.
Jake said nothing as Josie followed the movements of his arm, her eyes not coming to Jake but to his chest when Gagnon gestured his way, something Jake didn’t like all that much. Then her full attention shot right back to Gagnon.
“I don’t understand,” she said softly and she sounded like she really f*cking didn’t.
“Jesus, Josephine, how could you not understand?” Gagnon bit out. His eyes flicked to Jake then cut back to Josie. “You failed to mention in all your talk about Jake just how close you were getting with Jake.” And after that, he jerked a hand up, indicating Josie in her nightie.
That also made him feel better and not minutely.
She’d talked about him to this guy.
A lot.
“All right, Henry, this is awkward to be certain,” Josie replied, taking another step back from him like she didn’t like to be that close to his anger at the same time thankfully closing her robe around her front and keeping her arms crossed there. “But I must note at this juncture that I didn’t expect you to be here. We spoke only yesterday and you didn’t inform me you were coming. This is a surprise.”
“I have to admit, sweetheart, having a second to think on it, this isn’t a surprise to me,” Gagnon told her before he looked to Jake. “Don’t get comfortable. I know she’s good but she rarely goes back for seconds.”
Jake felt his muscles expand, his gut twist and his neck get tight as he heard Josie gasp.
He knew she was good?
“Henry!” she snapped and he looked back to her.
“You can’t think in twenty-three years, Josephine, that the men you’ve f*cked haven’t talked. Half of them thought I’d already had you. Then again, if that was the case, they wondered why I didn’t keep you.”
She’d taken another step back, her face pale, and Jake saw that even in profile her eyes were wide.
“Why are you speaking to me this way?”
Suddenly, Gagnon leaned toward her and it was then Jake took a step forward. But he only leaned in and Jake stayed alert but stopped.
“Because, Josephine, I’m f*cking sick to death of this bullshit, watching you make your selections and waiting for you to be done with that shit so I can get my turn.”
Another gasp came from Josie but Gagnon wasn’t done.
“And now you’re f*cking a man who owns a f*cking strip club?”
Her back shot straight and her hands dropped but she was stuck at something he said earlier, “Get your turn?”
“Josephine, for f*ck’s sake, I’ve been in love with you since you walked in to interview with me two f*cking decades ago.”
Josie went still. Jake went still. The air went still.
F*ck, decades. He’d had her decades.
Jake had her for just weeks, he’d had her only twice, and now this a*shole was finally letting this shit hang out?
“You’ve been in love with me?” she whispered.
“Since the beginning,” he returned.
“I…I…how can that be?”
“How couldn’t it be?” he shot back. “You’re everywhere with me. You’re almost always at my side. I’ve taken more pictures of you than anyone else and the only photo I carry with me in a goddamned frame and set up in every f*cking hotel room I enter is one of you and me.”
“I’m your assistant,” she reminded him.
“You know a lot of your colleagues. Any of their employers have a picture of them together in a silver frame that goes everywhere with them?”
She shook her head. “You…you had other women.”
“You had other men,” he clipped.
Her voice was rising when she fired back, “You’ve found lovers right in front of me.”
“And it’s clear you didn’t give a f*ck, you don’t give a f*ck and you’ll never give a f*ck.”
“That makes no sense,” she told him.
But he didn’t hear her, he kept on target.
“And now I don’t give a f*ck.”
After Gagnon got that out, he moved to pick up his bag and went to the door.
Hand on the handle, he turned to Jake.
“Advice. Be careful. Her thing is give them enough to make them need it but leave them wanting. She gets off on that. Lays devastation in her wake and she doesn’t feel it, just keeps sipping her tea and her Chambord and looking for the next fool to leave gagging for it.”
Before Jake could say a word or Josie could do it, Gagnon was out the door, slamming the heavy wood behind him.
Jake didn’t move. His eyes trained to Josie who had her head turned away from him to stare at the door, he stayed completely still. Tense and still.
He knew she’d been in love with her boss for years. Lydie told him. The same that Gagnon had been in love with her. Lydie told him that too. So Jake had no idea which way this would go.
Seeing as Gagnon was everything she wanted in a man and she’d wanted him for decades, if he was to guess, she’d pull open that door and go running after him, leaving Jake behind.
So that was why he stayed still. Tense and still. Waiting for her to gut him.
Therefore he was shocked as shit when she didn’t throw open the door. He watched as her head slowly turned to him and her dazed eyes in her pained face moved over his body before they caught his.
Her voice was also pained and dazed when she asked, “Why are you all the way over there?”
He wasn’t all the way over anywhere. He was four feet away.
But he got what she was saying, he f*cking liked what she was saying, he felt his neck relax, his gut stopped twisting, and he dropped his arms to go to her.
She beat him to it. Turning and rushing him, she slammed into him full force, wrapping her arms around him and bursting into tears.
No.
F*ck no.
If he would have guessed, this was not the way he thought it would go.
But he wasn’t Henry Gagnon. No way he was going to waste the opportunity of what she was giving him.
So he bent and picked her up in his arms. When he had her there she shoved her face in his neck, wrapped her arms tight around his shoulders and he felt her body shudder repeatedly with her sobs.
He carried her to the family room, sat on the couch, putting her in his lap. He twisted them and took them down so they were stretched out and he had her trapped against the back, his body mostly on hers.
He knew she didn’t feel trapped. She wanted more. And he knew this because she burrowed into him and held on tight.
Jake stroked her hair as he whispered, “Shh, baby.”
Her body bucked and she hiccupped, pressing deeper.
“Shh, Josie. Get a handle on it. Man who talks that way to you is not worth this.”
She pulled her face out of his neck, trained her wet eyes on him and cried, “But he’s my friend!”
He shook his head. “He’s a shit for brains dick who didn’t have the balls to work for what he wanted but does have the balls to be pissed at you for not giving it to him. He’s not your friend. He’s an a*shole.”
She didn’t agree or disagree. She was in her own head and probably not listening to a thing he said. He knew this when she went on and did it loudly.
“It’s ridiculous for him to say he loved me. He hit on women right in front of me.” She paused before she said, nearly in a shout. “Successfully! At least I was discreet!”
He did not want to discuss her being discreet. He actually didn’t want to be doing this at all.
But she was lying on her couch pressed to him and not running after that a*shole.
And she needed him.
So he was going to do it.
Jake slid a hand to her jaw and dipped his face close. “You seriously didn’t know he was into you?” he asked gently.
“Absolutely not,” she snapped.
“Lydie did.”
She stopped crying abruptly as well as nearly shouting and blinked. “She did?”
“Didn’t want him for you.”
Her eyes got wide. “She didn’t?”
“No, baby. A man whose play for over twenty years was to try to make you jealous enough to make your own play?” He shook his head. “F*ck no. Lydie liked him as a person, as your boss, but she did not want him for you. She knew the guy who got in there with you had to give a shit enough to do the work because she knew you’re worth the effort.”
Her lips had parted, her eyes got big again and she stared.
Then, thank f*ck, it dawned.
He saw it on her face and he knew it when she repeated quietly, “Give a shit enough to do the work.”
“Yeah,” he confirmed, wrapping both arms around her and sliding under her so she was mostly on top. “’Cause you’re worth it,” he finished.
She stared down at him for a long time before he felt her body relax, saw her eyes warm and her face get soft.
Then she declared, “I need a Kleenex.”
He grinned up at her, giving her that move, allowing her to change the subject because he knew she needed it. Then he asked, “Where are they?”
She looked to the side, murmuring, “Coffee table.”
He looked that way, spotting the box. Then he knifed up, taking her with him, arranging her on his lap. He leaned forward and reached out an arm. He pulled more than one out, leaned back and handed them to her.
Delicately, like she was wiping her face and blowing her nose in front of the Queen of England, she took care of business. When she was done, she looked around self-consciously, obviously not sure what to do with her used tissues, this reminding him that pretty much all the time she was totally f*cking cute.
He took them from her and she bit her lip as she watched him throw them on the coffee table.
She stopped biting her lip when he lifted both hands to frame her face and her eyes came to his.
“You good?” he asked.
“That was unpleasant,” she said by way of answer.
“It was, Slick. But you good?”
“I’ve no idea what my future will bring, primarily employment, and it will be quite devastating to lose Henry, which after that scene it seems I will. But regardless, he means something to me,” she stated.
After that bullshit in the foyer, Jake didn’t agree. Then again, maybe if given time, she’d see it for the bullshit it was and come around to his way of thinking.
“So you’re saying you’re not good,” he guessed.
“No, Jake, I’m not good,” she confirmed then took a deep breath before going on. “What I am is in dire need of coffee and I’ve found a toothbrush still in its packaging. I’m not looking forward to football but I am looking forward to seeing your home and spending the day with you and your children so I’ll think about Henry tomorrow.”
He smiled at her, sliding his hands from her head so he can wrap his arms around her. “Good plan.”
“Since I’m down here, I’ll make coffee,” she offered.
“I’ll accept that,” he replied and tightened his arms around her, bringing her closer, his eyes dropping to her mouth. “After you kiss me.”
He saw her lips part before he watched them coming his way. He felt her hands glide up his arms and around his neck as he dropped his head to give her better access.
She took it, her mouth opening under his and she gave him her tongue.
The second he got it, he sucked it deeper.
When he did, she pressed closer.
Feeling that, he took over.
To do that best, he dropped her back to the couch and covered her.
This meant coffee was further delayed seeing as he liked her mouth, he’d waited a while to have it and he was in the mood to take his fill.
Josie was in a similar mood.
So they made out on her couch in her house, the couch that used to be Lydie’s in the house that Lydie had given her granddaughter.
It was a long time after they were done, when they’d had coffee, he’d made her eggs and toast and he was waiting not very patiently in the kitchen for Josie to get ready to take on the day, when he thought that Lydie would like that.
All of it.
And she’d like it a f*ckuva lot.