“Quinn okay?” Kaeleb asks, heaving his backpack on his shoulder as we head to our Elements of Trust class. “I haven’t seen you guys at breakfast lately.”
“She’s okay. Quiet. She did make up with Sabrina though.” Kaeleb’s irritated expression reflects my own inner dissatisfaction with this development.
“I know,” I concede. “I think it’s just easier for her right now to forgive and forget. Evidently there are some deep-rooted ties there that she doesn’t want to mess with…family stuff, you know?” I explain, not that I really understand it.
A harsh grunt next to me tells me he feels the same way.
“I’ll try to get her to come to breakfast tomorrow,” I add.
Kaeleb nods before grinning back at me. “Have you seen Sabrina or Candace? You know, since…”
The corner of my mouth lifts, still extremely self-satisfied with my cereal vengeance. “No, but I’m sure I will, unfortunately.”
“Sign me up for that shit.”
I chuckle under my breath as we continue walking, cutting across the lawn together, the fresh cut grass clinging to my Docs. A bitter gust of wind and the reddish hue of the leaves remind me that fall is ending and that we will be heading into winter soon. Even with the sun shining, it’s getting a bit chilly. As an involuntary shiver rakes over my entire body, Kaeleb throws me a sideways glance. I really should have grabbed my jacket. This old worn-out concert tee isn’t cutting it.
Kaeleb stops mid-stride and shrugs his backpack and leather bomber jacket onto the ground, leaving him in a heather grey hoodie that reads JUST HIT IT across his chest in block letters above an infamous Nike swoosh. After regrettably reading his delusion of grandeur, a smirk crosses my face. “Get a lot of dates wearing that do ya?”
“I get a lot of dates no matter what I’m wearing.” His lips twitch as he attempts to maintain a serious face. He’s become quite the ladies’ man since school started. It’s no surprise really. Kaeleb oozes sexy from every pore in his body.
Not that I pay attention.
“Right. Highly-regarded, self-respecting women no doubt,” I respond, the barbell of my black eyebrow lifting in annoyance.
His straight face breaks with smug laughter. “Hey, it’s college. I’m not trying to be a saint.”
“Well, you’re definitely on your way to Dating Hell. I’m just waiting on you to get that one, clingy, cries-when-you-don’t-call, psycho-stalker girl. Sign me up for that shit.”
With yet another laugh, he reaches down and grips the leather jacket in his hand before stepping closer to me and extending his arm, graciously offering his outermost layer for me to wear. I can feel the residual heat from his body as I take it from him.
“Oh! For me?” I yell with mock excitement, “Oh-em-geeeee! Kaeleb McMadden just gave me his jacket!” I make sure to fan my face for dramatic effect and watch as a group of girls passes us, their jaws dragging the ground. Rolling my eyes, I fight the urge to give them the finger, which seems to be my favorite form of communication with anyone that isn’t Quinn or Kaeleb these days. Well, Quinn anyway.
A crooked smile forms on his face as he watches my fierce monologue, not a hint of embarrassment in his expression. “Did you just make a joke, Raven?”
Cue middle finger.
Another chuckle passes under his breath as I slip on the brown leather. “I thought you weren’t trying to be a saint. I would say that offering your jacket is pretty…saintly.” He grins and shrugs as I slowly take in his scent, the smell threatening the defenses of my Level 3 security. With the fresh cut grass all around me and the smell of his fresh laundry, the combination produces a familiar fragrance that just is Kaeleb. It’s almost enough to overwhelm the lock on my bin, but I must have mentally added a deadbolt because his access has luckily been denied.
After exhaling a breath of relief, I give him the tiniest of smiles, situating myself in his jacket and then sliding my backpack over both shoulders as Kaeleb does the same. “I can be funny, you know.”
“I know you’re funny,” he replies, his eyes finding the ground in front of us as we begin to walk.
“You don’t know anything about me,” I snap, probably a little too defensively.
“Don’t I?” He stops his long strides and, therefore, so do I. We’re never going to make it to class at this rate.
I turn to tell him this, but as soon as our eyes meet the words escape me, his hazel-brown eyes stealing my breath. They’re narrowed, as if he’s trying to strip me clean of my blackened veil. Almost as though he’s searching my darkness.
“No, you don’t,” I reply quickly.
Fear works its way into my throat as he continues to scan me closely before tilting his head. “Hmm…interesting.” His hand rises and once again skims the scarred area alongside my chin. “I would say that I know you better than you think I do.”
My brain jolts to life, sending out an emergency distress signal that more Level 3 memories, possibly even Level 4, may be breached. This is not good.
I ignore the way his touch riles every single one of my nerve endings, and turn on my heel, offering him nothing more as I continue on to class. I can hear his backpack shuffling as he walks behind me, but thankfully he makes no attempt to catch up.
Traveling the rest of the way separately, we finally arrive, barely making it to class on time. Once we’re accounted for, we make our way out to the fielded area where most of our exercises are performed, and as we begin to congregate, I strategically place as many people in between us as I can. I refuse to look at him, but his presence continues to suffocate me no matter how far away from him I stand.
“Alrighty kids! We’re going to buddy up today.” A series of groans follow as Dr. Palmer begins calling out the corresponding names in groups of two. His pudgy finger taps up and down on top of his clipboard with each announcement.
My heart rate triples, increasing the pressure in my chest. I always get paired up with Kaeleb. Every. Single. Time.
“McMadden and Miller.”
Sigh.
I turn and hesitantly begin weaving my way through my brilliant protection plan.
Damn my last name. I should have taken Linda’s.
Squeezing by the only person left between us, my eyes stay focused on Kaeleb’s boots in front of me. Strands of black with my latest plum-accented coloring whip across my face, the breeze picking up and chilling me to the bone. Threading my fingers through my hair, I gather it together and tuck the heap behind my collar, then wrap Kaeleb’s jacket tightly around me, hoping to harbor some of the rapidly fading warmth.
“You okay? You look more pale than usual.”
Squinting, I lift my head and shield my hand with my eyes, finally locking gazes with Kaeleb.
“I’m fine, just cold.”
I’m also extremely short of breath and might be experiencing a mild heart attack, but I leave that unsaid.
“Okay guys, it’s time to start.” A hush blankets the crowd of students as Dr. Palmer chucks his clipboard to the ground. “Today is going to be less physical and more of an emotional exercise.”
Shit.
“I need you and your partner to sit on the ground in front of one another.”
Swallowing deeply, I attempt to calm my erratic breathing as I turn, finally facing Kaeleb and meeting his eyes briefly before slowly descending to the take my seat. His face remains expressionless as he makes his move to sit cross-legged on the grass in front of me, scooting closer until our knees are touching.
“Now, please take each other’s hands. This is a time of trust and connecting with one another.”
F*ck. Me.
My eyes close on their own as I timidly reach forward. Every nerve ending becomes hypersensitive as the heat from his approaching hand surges over mine, emanating a spark that spreads throughout my body. It rushes along my arms, leaving behind goose bumps as it passes, causing the hairs to stand on end. Soon Kaeleb’s hand slides into mine, palm against palm as his fingers curl themselves, gripping me securely.
“I like to call this the Bubble Exercise. As you hold onto your partner, imagine a bubble containing only the two of you, just you and them, safely inside. Nothing can escape into the environment around you. This is your haven to speak freely. There is no judgment inside the bubble, only the release of something about yourself that you want to express. A secret of sorts. You may decide amongst yourselves who goes first. It is up to you what you choose to reveal to the other.”
I clutch Kaeleb’s hands like a vise, my eyes shooting open only to find the face directly in front of me giving away absolutely nothing—completely void of emotion as he stares back at me. Palmer clasps his hands together, and his voice sends my heart into my throat with his next command.
“Go.”
It’s only then that I pick up on Kaeleb’s slight hesitation. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows slowly before clearing his throat. “Right. Well, I might as well go first since you look like you’re about to pass out.”
My torso is hunched over my legs which are crossed in front of me, feet tucked under my thighs. My chest rises and falls with each rapid breath I take as panic streaks through my body at the thought of being forced to reveal even one of my closely kept secrets. Lord knows I have plenty of them.
Still holding on to my hands, he begins to lean forward and doesn’t stop moving until he’s so close his nose is only centimeters away from mine.
“I’ve got one that covers both of us,” he whispers softly. His eyes glide over my face, not stopping until they land on the one mark I wish he had never seen.
A lopsided grin forms, then he brings his eyes back to meet mine. Tightening his grip around my hands, he presses off of his knees, moving forward until his heated cheek is flush with mine and his warm breaths tickle the shell of my ear. I hold my own breath as my heart ricochets off the back of my ribcage and listen as he whispers softly, “I know your secret, which in turn has been my secret…Bree.”
I jerk back instantly, the previous pounding in my ears now bordering on excruciating.
Bree.
My fingers involuntarily shoot straight out, releasing me from his hold.
It’s too much.
Cold replaces warmth as the blood drains from my face, blackening my vision.
I can’t breathe.
Upon the passing of the name from his lips, my past and present collide, the explosion so fierce it blows the steel door wide open. For the first time in ten years, a Level 4 memory escapes its confines, leaving me spinning out of control as it steals my consciousness.