Chapter 24
Elle
I lay in my bed, the door to my dorm securely fastened and locked. I'd taken to locking it now every time I was alone in the room. Before, I'd been happy to leave it open, but not now, not any more.
The feeling of Brad's lips was still lingering in my mind. I'd kissed him a thousand times before but now things were completely different. His lips carried a menace, a feeling of desperation and isolation.
I had begun to feel as though his desire for me would never be quenched, that he'd continue to haunt my steps forever. The thought ran my blood cold.
I climbed out of bed and over towards my desk to pick up another book. Exams were coming up soon and I had plenty of revision to get through. I guess that was one benefit of my newly developed agoraphobia: now I'd have lots of time to revise without any distractions getting in the way.
The problem was, I was distracted. Not by my friends or dance class or anything like that. No, I was distracted by thoughts of Brad's eyes on my window. Thoughts that he'd be waiting outside for me to go off to the shops or out to class. Thoughts that he'd eventually make his way into the building and towards my room, his desperate eyes staring through the door at me as I hid in my bed.
Lexi had come over several times to see how I was doing. Her and Alice and Tess were all worried, all there trying to convince me to go to the police.
But for what? What would I say? That my ex boyfriend is around and he, erm, kissed me and ran away. He hadn't really done anything. He hadn't attacked me, he hadn't tried to rape me or even threaten me.
I knew the police would laugh at me, tell me it wasn't serious enough for them.
No. This was a problem that I had to deal with. I'd broken his heart, I'd made this mess. It was up to me to try to make things right so that we could both move on.
A part of me knew I was being naive. It knew that I wasn't dealing with a normal person, that my words could do nothing to satisfy him. But I had to try. I had to try to put this to bed once and for all.
....
The door knocked loudly.
The sound sent a jolt running through my body, causing me to drop my book to the floor.
I sat up in bed, my breath lost. I could see the shadow of two feet at the bottom of the door, someone waiting for me to open it up.
I stayed silent, not a sound in the room or out in the corridor, hoping that they'd go away and leave me alone. A sound of squeaking metal pierced the quiet and I looked up to see the handle turning down slowly. My eyes were set on the lock.
I did lock it, didn't I?
I got my answer as the handle turned back up, followed quickly by another knock. I willed for whoever it was to leave, to walk away, to think I wasn't in.
Then a voice filtered through the door, muffled by the wood but unmistakable. My heartbeat rose quickly, my nerves settling. It was soft, concerned, a deep well of worry within it.
“Elle, are you in there?”
I slid from the bed and towards the door, stepping lightly. I still wasn't sure I wanted to see anyone right now so was keen to make sure my presence remained in doubt.
His voice came again.
“Elle, I'm just here to see if you're OK. I want to know you're safe.”
I reached for the lock and twisted gently. It clicked open and the handle quickly turned. The door swung open and Crash stood before me, his eyes troubled.
He looked me up and down quickly and gave me a hug. I must have looked a mess wearing my sweatpants and without any make-up on. He'd never seen me like this.
His arms were strong around me, his embrace making me feel safer, more secure. I couldn't help my eyes from welling up, tears lightly dropping from them as I lifted my own arms around his broad and muscled back.
He released me and brushed my tears away with his fingers. His eyes seemed to be changing. Going from concern and worry to anger, those raging eyes that I'd seen before, once again catching blaze.
“Why are you here Crash?” I asked him. The last time he'd come to see me he'd basically said that he had feelings for me but couldn't act on them.
“I saw Alice at the bar,” he said quickly. “She told me that your ex boyfriend attacked you in a parking lot?” His eyes were fully burning now, his jaw clenching.
“He didn't attack me, not really. He just...” My words began trailing off.
“What did he do?”
“Nothing. He just creeped me out, he wasn't violent.”
His eyes stayed fixed on me. He knew there was more to it. The way I was behaving: hiding in my room, scared to even answer the door - that wasn't normal. No, my face told a story of its own.
“Do you know where he is?” he asked, his voice turning more cold and businesslike.
I shook my head. I had no idea if he was still in town. No, that was a lie. I know he's here. I can feel him.
“It's OK,” he said, “leave it to me. I'll take care of it.”
The many words of warning and rumors about Crash that I'd heard came flooding into my head. I'll take care of it. I didn't even want to think about what that meant.
“Please don't Crash. This is my problem. I don't want anyone else involved.”
“No Elle, I am involved now. Nothing can change that. Tell me his surname.”
I hesitated. His stare told me that he wasn't leaving until he had the information that he wanted.
“Crash, I don't want him to be hurt. He needs help, not to be beaten up or....worse.”
His eyes were still set. “I only want to talk to him. He needs to be told Elle, he needs to know what he's doing to you.”
I knew he was right. I figured that coming here would be enough for me to move on and avoid the issue forever. But no, he'd found me now. Maybe he did need to be told.
“I know his first name's Brad. What's his surname.”
I hesitated.
“Come on Elle, I'm not leaving until I have it.”
I breathed deep again, my mind running in several directions.
“Scott,” I said eventually. “His name's Brad Scott.”
He reached and took my hand. It was still trembling lightly. “It's OK Elle, you don't have to be scared of this guy any more. I'll have a friendly word. I'm sure he'll go back to California when I'm done.”
I couldn't help but feel as though he was only telling me what I wanted to hear. Inside his words, deep within them, was a hidden menace.
“Please Crash, please don't hurt him. It's not his fault.”
He hugged me again.
“Elle, I told you before that I'd be there for you if you needed me. I'm not lying to you. I promise I'll just talk to him, nothing more.”
He leaned in and kissed me softly on the cheek, his lips lingering. I felt an urge to turn my head so that our lips met but he pulled away before I could.
“Don't worry Elle. Everything will be OK.”
With those words he turned, a consoling smile on his face, and walked briskly out of the room.