18
DECEM ET OCTO
Finn
I wake with a start, from the nightmares of broken glass and burning metal.
It’sRealRealRealReal. She’s deadddddddddd. The whispers hiss and laugh.
I gasp for air, gripping the bedclothes tight, as I fight the clouds of confusion and panic and fear.
Without a second thought, I pad down the hall to Calla’s room and climb into the empty side of her bed. Something stabs me in the back, and I pull out a bouquet of flowers. I stare at them for a second, puzzled. Then I realize… Dare must’ve given them to her. Suddenly and overwhelmingly annoyed, I get out of bed and crush them under my heel.
I want her to be happy, I do.
I do.
But… Not yet. I just can’t be without her yet.
Calla quiets the voices.
She’s the only thing that does.
I crawl back in beside her, curling up next to her and then I fight for sleep, ache for it, pray for it. And finally, finally, finally, the blackness comes, covering me up like a blanket, and hiding my crazy.
For now.