That was an exaggeration, of course. The police had a broad picture of what had happened that night, and he knew Internal Security had hit the jackpot with evidence linking the cult to the murders. Nonetheless, his words, describing the specifics, would put the final stamp on this case—and possibly on his life.
So, he went back and forth, taking no action and vowing that when he did, he’d do it sober—which was easier said than done in these long, empty days waiting for SCI to get its act together. One thing both versions of the report shared was a harrowing tale of Mae’s heroics, how she took out impossible numbers of attackers and finally was forced to kill Emil in self-defense. It was Justin’s favor to both her and Leo and would also go a long way toward getting Mae back to the regular pr?torian duty she longed for. Sure, she’d still have to cope with the mental fallout of the supernatural proceedings she’d witnessed, not to mention the earth-shattering revelations about her birth, but she was strong. She would survive and move on, eventually forgetting him.
I thought the self-pity and melodrama would end after Panama, said Magnus one evening as Justin mulled over his fate. But you’ve managed to take it to new heights.
I’m not being melodramatic, just stating a fact. She’s hardly returned my calls, and it’s better for both of us that way. She’s getting on with her life, and I’m going to do the same. No point in sitting around.
Actually, that’s kind of what you’ve been doing for the last week, Horatio retorted. Unless you consider those roommates you went out with last night a worthy use of your time.
Very worthy, Justin assured him.
You’ve gone through so much and seen so much, yet here you are, back to drinking, dice, and women, scolded Magnus. At the very least, you should work on your runes in your downtime.
No. One was enough.
Justin didn’t want to do any more embracing of higher powers quite yet. He’d grown comfortable in exile with the ravens and the idea of a nebulous godly patron keeping track of him. Being face-to-face with powers of the magnitude he’d seen recently had been staggering, however, enough to make him seriously uneasy about his own future. Even the small charm he’d performed for Mae had left him unsettled, as was acknowledging that she was one of the elect. Seeing exactly what a deity could do made him want to avoid serving one more than ever. Mae was unquestionably off-limits, and her distance this week had made it easier to strengthen his resolve against future entanglements.
No, he told the ravens. No Mae, no magic. I’m going to make a call on this goddamned report now and send it off. Then I’m going barhopping in the hopes of finding more creative roommates. Or maybe twins.
No, you aren’t, said Horatio. You’re going to Tessa’s expo.
Justin had nearly forgotten about tonight. Tessa had finally been readmitted to school, and her film class was having a viewing of all of the students’ short documentaries, open to friends and family. The idea of watching two hours of student films made Justin want to gouge his eyes out, but Cynthia had threatened to gouge a lot more if he didn’t go.
And so, a couple of hours later, he went to the high school with Cynthia and Quentin and made himself comfortable in one of the auditorium’s seats. Most of the films were as inane as he’d expected, but thankfully, none were over ten minutes. It gave his mind a chance to wander over the report dilemma. He’d almost convinced himself of what he’d do when Tessa’s turn came.
She walked out onstage, wearing one of the dresses they’d bought that first week. Her hair was still as long as ever, but at least she no longer wore it in an obviously provincial way. He thought she looked adorable and dared anyone to say otherwise. She gave a small, succinct introduction about her film and how it was inspired by being an immigrant. Her speech was delivered in a loud, clear voice, but he heard a few people around him grumble about the accent. No wonder she always seemed so irate after school.
Her film was brilliant—and he was certain it wasn’t just because of his bias. Her observations gave the Gemman audience a mirror for some of its odder idiosyncrasies, though he suspected most of tonight’s viewers didn’t find them odd at all. There was a poignancy to it that struck him deeply, and most of all, it was honest. Gemmans liked to act as though their world was out in the open, what with all the shows and documentaries peering into people’s lives. But they were all edited and dressed up to create an image. Reporters and directors defined the truth—even he did in his job, according to Tessa. She did none of that, though. She didn’t spin or sensationalize or grasp for things that weren’t there. She simply told the truth. It was a talent—no, a gift, that she didn’t even realize she possessed.
“Was it as bad as you thought?” Cynthia asked him later as they walked along a downtown sidewalk. They’d decided to take the family out to dinner, and Poppy—who Justin was sure really would be in a miscreant girls camp someday—had come along. Quentin and the two girls walked ahead, and he was attempting eight-year-old flirting, which Justin took as a promising sign.