“Everything is going to be fine. I promise,” he said.
I shook my head. “How is everything going to be fine? I upset everyone in my life except for you.” What if Matt never spoke to me again? What if Kennedy didn’t? I was going to be all alone again. I couldn’t start over again with no one. I couldn’t do it. Despite what Matt said, I wasn’t strong. And who knew if he’d even meant that. Because he’d said it himself…he and I were both liars.
“Do you know what you need?” my dad asked. “A spa weekend. I’ll call some people in. That’s what Isabella always does when she’s upset.”
I’m not Isabella. God, or am I?
“Or maybe something else?” he said with a smile. “Name it, and we can do it.”
“You said you’d teach me how to play golf. Could we do that?” I’d never taken him up on his offer to go to his country club. And a little father daughter time might help lift my spirits.
“Well, you won’t be able to this weekend. But soon, of course.”
“I can do it this weekend. I’m pretty sure I’m uninvited to Friendsgiving. And I could really use the distraction. I’m just going to be sitting around the house bored.”
He lowered his eyebrows, as if my response confused him. “You’ll be resting, yes. That’s just what you need.” He patted my knee.
I wasn’t sure if that was true. I didn’t want to rest and get pampered. I just wanted Matt back. “I really didn’t mean for it to go that far last night,” I said.
“I know, princess. But it was good to see a little fire in you.” He smiled at me.
“You’re happy that I made Isabella and all that pudding fall through the ceiling?”
He laughed. “Between you and me? I’m glad you stood up for yourself.”
At least he understood. And he didn’t look at me any differently. I disgusted everyone else. But my dad thought I was an angel. Maybe that was the whole problem. Maybe his views were skewed because he was used to living with Mrs. Pruitt and Isabella. Anyone was better than them.
But better than them wasn’t good enough. I looked down at the ring on my finger. I was a Pruitt. Matt didn’t want me to be who I was. His parents didn’t want me to be who I was. But if I wasn’t me, then who the hell else was I supposed to be? I thought I was finally fitting in to my new world.
“I don’t want to become Isabella,” I said and sniffled.
“Brooklyn, you are your mother’s daughter. You’re…you. You can’t possibly be someone else. Who’s filling your mind with things like that? Matthew?”
I pressed my lips together.
“You deserve someone who believes in you enough to know that you’re special. You are. I’ve never met anyone so caring and generous.”
I wasn’t sure what I’d done yesterday was in any way caring or generous. I had no idea why he’d chosen those two words to describe me. And I didn’t tell my dad that Matt stopped believing in me because I’d given him a reason to. Because I was a liar. “Thanks, Dad.”
He patted my knee. “Now, I’d love to keep chatting, but it’s just about time for your appointment.”
Oh, I’d completely forgotten about that. “Dad, I really don’t feel like going anywhere today.”
“Dr. Wilson came here of course. Come on, you wanted to see what was in that room down the hall anyway, right?”
What did that have to do with Dr. Wilson? “Um, yeah, okay.” Maybe it would be good to move around. Besides, I didn’t want to be alone right now. Talking to Dr. Wilson would at least keep my mind preoccupied.
I walked out of my room and tried to hide from Miller’s judging glare. Although…he didn’t look so disapproving this morning. He just looked…sad. For me? Because of me? I had no idea. I could add him to the list of people that hated me right now.
His eyes locked with mine. “You don’t have to do this,” Miller mouthed silently to me. “You can still back out.”
What? Why was everyone so concerned about whether or not I was on birth control? It was no one’s business but mine. I just turned away from him. I didn’t have the energy to fight with him right now. All the fight in me was gone.
We stopped outside the locked room down the hall and my dad started to type in the code.
“Do you think that maybe everyone was better off before I got here?” I asked. That was the question I kept coming back to. Before I came to New York, the Hunters and Caldwells were friends. Kennedy had never dated that creep Cupcake. Miller was probably happy. Felix hadn’t been in prison. And my uncle wouldn’t have had to waste his final few months on this earth taking care of me. I swallowed hard. I was the worst.
My dad shook his head. “How can you possibly say that?”
“Because it’s true.”
“You saved my life. In more ways than one. Truly, Brooklyn. You are my angel. And I’m so grateful every day that you walked into my life.”
“Really?” I blinked back my tears. It was exactly what I needed to hear. Maybe I had made one person’s life better. And even though I had been wary of my dad at first, he’d made my life better too. I didn’t know what I’d ever do without him now. Maybe when my mom was pregnant he hadn’t wanted me. But he wanted me now. And today I really needed to feel wanted.
“Really.” He kissed the top of my head and pressed enter on the keypad. The door made a weird hissing noise and he opened it.
The room was blindingly white. I blinked a few times, waiting for my eyes to adjust.
“Oh good,” my dad said. “You’re already here.” He shook Dr. Wilson’s hand.
I looked around the white room. There was a bed, a chair, and lots of weird machines. It kind of looked like a hospital room. I shuddered. I hated hospitals. And I knew my dad hadn’t asked me much about how my mom had died, but he knew she’d gotten sick. Why would he think I wanted to see this room? I’d basically lived in a hospital room like this the past few years. And why the hell did he even have a room like this?
“It’s good to see you again,” Dr. Wilson said. “How about you lie down for me and we can get started?”