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I straightened my face, shaking my head. “Yeah, just thinking…” I bit my lip, wondering if I should confess my fears to Denny or not. Again, he’d probably find it morbidly funny. Deciding to put it a different way, I shrugged and asked, “Is Abby okay with you being here…with me.” Denny immediately shook his head, lowering his mug from his mouth.
“I’m not here with you.”
I flushed and looked down, not expecting words that harshly true to leave his mouth. I was used to flowers and poetry. I was used to sappy comments about me being his heart. He sighed. “That came out wrong. I just mean…I came here for the job.” I looked back up at him and he shrugged. “Abby knows what went down with me and you. She knows that I would never go back to you, Kiera.”
He held my eye, not backing down from his coldly honest statement. I felt my lip quaver as so many emotions flooded me I couldn’t sort through them all. He was bluntly saying exactly what I’d been thinking.
It was no great shock, but still…hearing it put so plainly… Yeah, it stung.
Frowning, he shook his head. “I’m sorry that’s sounds…cold.” He finally looked away from me, down to the cup cooling in his hands.
“Sometimes the truth is cold.” He peered up at me, and when he spoke again, his accent was thicker with emotion. “I still want your friendship, though. You’re still important to me.”
I nodded, swiping a stubborn tear away from my eye. “It’s okay to be honest with me, Denny.” I sighed, laughing a little. “I was sitting here, sort of thinking the same thing anyway.” He tilted his head, his dark brows bunching, and I laughed again. “Just that Kellan had nothing to worry about because you and I would never…go down that path again.” Denny laughed and shook his head. Raising his mug, he extended it to me. “To never sleeping together again?” he teased, a sparkle in his eye.
Seeing my favorite goofy grin returning, I smiled and clinked his mug with mine. “To never having sex again.” He raised an eyebrow at me and I quickly added, “With each other, I mean.” 286
Laughing heartily, he sipped his tea as I quickly downed my coffee.
God, I was an idiot. Still chuckling, he relaxed back in his seat again. I smiled that the residual tension had started melting away. I didn’t think I could ever just be friends with Kellan again—hell, we’d never managed to just be friends when we were friends—but Denny…the comfort there made it easy to slip into that role with each other.
As Denny smirked to himself, I worried my lip, thinking of Kellan again. Setting down my drink, I cleared my throat. Denny looked up at me. “Um, this is going to sound weird, but if you happen to talk to Kellan anytime soon…can you not tell him that you’re here?” Denny sighed, his shoulders slumping. “Kiera…” I shook my head, interrupting his protest. “Please? Just…fail to mention it?”
Sighing, Denny leaned over the table. “Kiera, I don’t want to tell you how to handle your relationship with him, but…you’ll never last if you start lying to him.”
I shook my head, leaning over as well. “And I won’t lie…I just don’t want to tell him right now.”
Denny gave me a dry look, like he didn’t see the difference in my statement. Honestly, I knew I was stretching the truth line, but Kellan would not react well to Denny being so close to me while he was gone. It was too similar to how we’d first gotten together.
Placing my hand over Denny’s, I shook my head again. “I know this is big, and I will tell him.” I sighed, pausing. “I just need to figure out how to tell him without…scaring him.”
Denny stared at me a moment, then his face softened into compassion.
“Alright, I won’t tell him…but I won’t lie either. If he asks me, I’ll tell him.” I started nodding immediately and Denny raised his eyebrows.
“I’ll tell him everything, Kiera…even this conversation.” I swallowed, then nodded. “That’s fine…it won’t come to that. I’ll tell him first.”
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He sighed, shaking his head as he looked out the window. “You better…I don’t need him venting his frustrations on me.” He bit his lip as his voice trailed off. I cringed. That’s exactly what Denny had done to Kellan, the night he’d beaten him to a bloody pulp.
Holding his hand in both of mine, I whispered, “Thank you, Denny.” He nodded, looking back to me. Changing the subject, I shifted to his new job. He brightened instantly, and then it was just like it was years ago, when he was telling me about something he was really excited about. He’d been in town for about a month, since the first part of the year, living out of a four star hotel until he found a place to rent.
“Why don’t you stay at Kellan’s?” I asked before I could think about it.
He looked at me oddly, then shook his head. “No, I don’t think that would be a good idea.”
I cringed, nodding. No, probably not. The ghosts were there for me, for Denny, who had had an awful situation explode in his face without any warning…the ghosts would be even harder to handle. I wouldn’t blame him if he never wanted to set foot in Kellan’s house again. It was kind of dumb for me to even ask. I guess I was just trying to be practical, like Denny often was, and Kellan’s place was completely empty right now. Vacant, patiently waiting for its owner’s return, just like me.
After explaining some of the campaigns he’d been involved in, even one for a feminine hygiene product that he could barely talk about with a straight face, I finally noticed the time on a clock behind him.
“Oh crap, I’m gonna be late.” Denny glanced at the clock I was looking at and scrunched his face. It was a cute expression and I laughed before I remembered why I really needed to go. Standing up, I collected my jacket and book bag. “We’ve been talking for longer than I realized. I’m gonna be late for work.”
Denny nodded, standing and gathering his coat as well.
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Pausing as I slipped mine on, I tilted my head at the door. “Do you want to come with me?” Shrugging, I added, “I could get you some dinner…just like old times.”
He looked down, smiling softly. “Just like old times.” When he looked back up, he shrugged, his goofy grin returning. “Sure…why not?” Denny followed me to Pete’s in his company car, a sleek, black thing that looked pricey. It made me smile that he was doing well; I always knew he would. That was something I’d always been sure about with Denny—he would have success at anything he tried. And being in charge at his age…it seemed he already was going places.
Pulling into Kellan’s unofficially reserved parking spot, I watched Denny pull up beside me. He was frowning as he stared at Kellan’s Chevelle, maybe wondering where his Honda was. I’d probably have to mention at some point that Anna had nearly confiscated the vehicle from me. Hopefully he wasn’t too bothered by the news.
But he didn’t mention anything as he stood by his sporty car, waiting for me. It was so weird to see him here, like I’d fallen through a worm-hole and been shoved back in time. Things were different, but things were the same, too. As I stepped up to his side, he twisted and we started walking to the doors. I felt a split-second of loss that he hadn’t held his hand out for me. It wasn’t that I wanted him to, or needed him to, more like I’d expected him to.
When you’re around someone for so long, you learn to anticipate their behavior, and in the past, Denny would have always smiled and extended a hand to me if we were walking together. Him not doing it was a little jarring, and I instantly didn’t feel like I was reliving the past anymore.
I realized the flaw with my impromptu plan when Denny walked through the doors with me—everyone’s jaw dropped as they all stared at us together again. Rita, Kate, all the regulars…even Jenny looked taken aback. Not many of them knew the Denny/Kellan triangle, but they knew that Denny was my ex and Kellan was my current.
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That Denny was conveniently back in town while Kellan was away was enough to cause a swirl of gossip in and of itself. That we were suddenly hanging out was even weirder, by several people’s standards from the looks on their faces. I’d probably have to have the “don’t tell Kellan” speech with a few of my friends too. Just for now. I needed some time first, a plan to keep Kellan from overreacting.
Leaning over a little as he stood beside me, Denny murmured, “Is it just me, or is everyone staring at us?”
I sighed and rolled my eyes, looking up at him. “It’s not just you…I guess it’s been a slow week for news.” I laughed. “We’re now the hottest story in town.”
He smirked at me. “Oh good, and I was worried that this would be awkward.”
I laughed a little more and motioned for him to take a seat anywhere he wanted. Surprisingly, or maybe it was just an unconscious habit since he’d usually sat there, he chose the band’s table.
I watched him for a moment before heading to the back to deposit my stuff. I nearly had my second collision of the day when Jenny stepped in front of me. Sidestepping just in time, I felt my heart skip a beat. I really hated running into people.
Jenny frowned as she glanced at Denny. She leaned into me. Speaking quietly, like she was afraid Denny could hear her all the way across the room, she whispered, “What are you doing, Kiera?” I looked over her face, a flame of irritation starting to flicker in me. Did everyone think I was incapable of just being friends with a guy? “Well, I thought I’d start my shift, since I am a few minutes late.” I tried to continue on to the back, but Jenny grabbed my arm. “No, with him, what are you doing with him?”
I looked over at Denny. Leaning on his elbows over the table, he was looking around the bar, absorbing being back inside it. Maybe he’d missed the place? Seeing his friend back in the city, Sam started heading 290
Denny’s way. I heard his booming greeting as I twisted back to Jenny. “I ran into an old friend who is back in town. I invited him here to buy him dinner, because I’ve missed seeing him.” Carefully unfurling her fingers from my arm, I added, “Why is that a problem?” I knew why…and so did Jenny. Shaking her head, she murmured,
“He’s not just a friend, Kiera, he’s your ex, the ex you and Kellan…” She sighed and I bit my lip to hold back my comment. Yes, I knew exactly what Kellan and I had done to him. I didn’t need it spelled out.
Glancing at my promise ring, she changed what she’d been about to say.
“Does Kellan know he’s here? Are you going to…see him…while Kellan’s away?”
I tilted my head, wondering if she’d really just asked if I was going to start carrying on with two men again. Shaking my head a little more harshly than was necessary, I snapped, “No!” She flinched a little at my reaction and exhaling, I made myself relax. I looped my arm around hers and started walking us to the back.
She relaxed against me as we walked, and in a more controlled voice I told her, “Yes, I’m going to probably hang out with him a few times while he’s back in town.” She raised her eyebrows at me and I quickly added, “No, I’m not ‘seeing’ him.” I glanced down at the ring snug around my finger and smiled. “I’m Kellan’s…and that’s not going to change, but Denny is a friend, and I’m not just going to ignore that he’s here.”
We stepped into the hallway and Jenny nodded, looking contemplative. Shaking my head, I added, “I’m not going back down a road that ended…as badly as it did.” I sighed and dropped my head. “I’ve learned my lesson, Jenny. I’m not that person anymore.” She patted my back as we stopped in front of the back room. “I know, Kiera. I guess I just didn’t want to see you mess up a good thing.” She ducked down to meet my eye. “And you and Kellan are a good thing.” I smiled and nodded. As she gave me a swift hug and prepared to leave, I grabbed her elbow. “Can you…when you talk to Evan, can you not mention that Denny’s here?”
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Her shoulders slumping, she gave me the exact same look Denny had earlier. “Kiera…”
I shook my head. “Kellan won’t understand. He won’t believe that nothing is going on. He will drop the tour and come home. He’ll stay by my side until I’m done with school or Denny leaves, whichever comes first.” I shook my head, slowly. “He’ll throw away everything, Jenny. His dreams…and Evan’s.”
Jenny sighed, holding my gaze. “You’re going to tell him?” I nodded. “Yes…as soon as I figure out how.” Closing her eyes, she shook her head. Opening them, she seemed resigned…and irritated. “I hate lying, Kiera, especially to Evan.” Releasing her elbow, I looked down. I hated lying too, but sometimes you had to fudge a little bit, to protect people. As Denny said, sometimes the truth was cold. Why inflict someone with the sting of it, if you didn’t have to? “I know, Jenny.” I peeked back up at her. “Just don’t mention it, if you can help it.”
She twisted her lip, then nodded. Shaking her head a little, she walked away. I called out a thanks but she didn’t look back at me. I sighed, hating this small deception already. It was necessary, though, for the time being.