I turn to look at what has everyone else’s attention. Shay’s standing in front of the screen with her hand over her mouth. “I can’t believe it,” she says, shaking her head. “Colton wouldn’t . . .”
“It doesn’t mean anything,” Brayden says. “It’s his father’s boat, so of course his fingerprints were all over everything.”
I don’t need to read the headlines scrolling across the bottom of the screen to understand what they’re talking about, but I read them anyway, a fist tightening around my chest with every word.
The same weapon is believed to have been used in the assault against Ellie Courdrey seven weeks ago.
All the air from my lungs is squeezed out of me.
Ellie’s alone.
I reach for my phone. “I need to call Ellie.”
Shay turns to me. “Where is she?”
“My house,” I say, putting the phone to my ear. “She was still in bed when I left.”
“She’s alone?” Brayden asks.
I squeeze my eyes shut. I hate how they’re all acting like Colton may be a danger to her. Fuck, I hate how I’m starting to believe he might be. But no. If Colton wanted to hurt her, he’d have done so at the lake two days ago. Right? Or does he need her alive until he gets information from her she couldn’t remember at the lake?
I hold the phone to my ear and wait for Ellie to pick up.
“Hello?”
“I’m on my way to get you. I want you over at Brayden’s with the rest of us.”
“You saw the news,” she says.
“Yeah. I guess that means you saw it too?”
“A few minutes ago.” She sighs. “I only turned it on because Detective Huxley called to tell me they’re having officers patrol around the house.”
“I don’t like you being alone.”
“Stay there,” she says. “I have my car, and I remember where Brayden’s is. I just need to get dressed, then I’ll be on my way.”
I was bracing myself for a fight and am surprised she’s agreed to join us. “I’m already on my way,” I say. “Stay in the house and lock the doors.” There are too many eyes on me, so I head to the rarely used living room in the front of the house.
“Don’t worry about me, Levi. I’ll be fine.”
“I won’t be fine until you’re next to me.” I open my mouth to say more, but Brayden wanders into the living room. There goes my privacy. “Okay. I’ll see you when I get there. I love you.”
“I love you too,” she says, but instead of feeling as amazing as they did last night, the words only heighten my anxiety. She’s trusting me to protect her.
When I end the call, Brayden stands beside me. “She’s okay?”
I nod, pulling my keys from my pocket. “Maybe too okay. Last weekend, she was terrified of Colton, but now she’s getting her memories back and isn’t scared of him anymore.” I squeeze the knot at the back of my neck. “Fuck it, but I think I preferred when she was scared of him. I liked thinking she’d have her guard up, at least.” I lower my voice. “He’s been my best friend my whole life, and I’m standing here thinking . . .” I shake my head. “I don’t even know what I’m thinking.”
“You’re worried about the woman you love.” My brother squeezes my shoulder. “And considering she was on death’s door not so long ago, no one can blame you for that.”
“Everything’s so fucked.”
“Just because the police issued a warrant doesn’t mean he’s guilty. Hell, we don’t even know if Nelson is dead. They found evidence, not a body. Nor do we know if what happened to Ellie is related or some random act of violence.”
“Somebody hurt her.” I squeeze my eyes shut. “She was safe at her mom’s. I was the one who talked her into coming back home. What the fuck kind of idiot does that?”
“If someone wants to hurt her, do you think she’d be safer at her mom’s or with you?”
If that someone is Colton, he could get into my house. He knows all he needs to bypass my security system. The same weapon. I don’t even want to say it out loud. “I don’t want to believe it was him.”
But I already know I need to make a call. I need to protect Ellie.
Ellie
Monday, August 27th
The ultrasound room in the Jackson Harbor Maternity Clinic is frigid, and the paper gown they gave me does nothing to keep me warm. They’ve put pictures on the walls of new moms and their babies. Maybe they’re patients from this clinic or maybe they’re just models posing for photos that are supposed to make expectant mothers less terrified of what’s to come. The photos are large—the only splashes of color in an otherwise beige room.
Instead of feeling comforted by the smiling faces, I feel profoundly alone and confused. I slept with Levi last night, and he told me he loved me. In that tiny stolen moment, there was enough hope and goodness to make me believe everything could turn out okay. Then I went home and looked at the bags of Colton’s belongings all over my living room and realized I was just running from reality. I still haven’t told Colton about the baby, but when I tell him, he’s going to want to be in my life, one way or another. And when I tell him about Levi, he’s going to want Levi out of his life. Do I really want to put a child in the middle of that? I’m in no position to be starting something with Levi. No matter how good last night felt.
The knock on the exam room door feels ominous.
“Come in.”
“Are you ready for me?” The woman sticks her head in, smiling. “I’m Rose, the ultrasound tech.”
“Hi. I’m Ellie.”
“Is it just you today, Ellie? This is exciting.”
“Just me.” I try to smile. I could have asked Ava to come. I know she’d have been thrilled. It should be exciting to be pregnant at the same time as your best friend. But instead it makes me draw unfair comparisons. She wanted a baby, even if she had to do it alone. I’m terrified of being a single mom. She’s a natural at everything she does and will be a great mom. I’m lucky if I manage to get all my bills paid on time. But the biggest, most painful difference between us is that she just got engaged to a man who’d slay dragons for her, and the father of my child spent his Saturday night with another woman—the mother of his four-year-old son. Then he chose to walk out the door instead of talking to me about it, and I slept with his best friend. Too bad Jerry Springer’s not still on—he’d love my trashy drama.
I squeeze my eyes shut. I wanted to be so much more.
“Okay,” the tech says. “Go ahead and lie back. This is going to feel a little cold.” She squeezes gel onto my belly then rubs the wand over me and slowly adjusts the angle. “Where are you hiding, little one?”
I watch the screen too, but I don’t know what I’m looking at. To me, it’s all various shades of gray—blobs and lines, like smears on a half-processed piece of photo paper.
“Right there,” she says, pointing to the screen. “There’s your little peanut.”
My breath catches as my eyes make sense of what I’m seeing. A face, a body, little arms and legs. Oh my goodness. “You’re really there.” I don’t mean to say it out loud, but the tech smiles.
“We’ll take some measurements and see how far along you are, and see if we can hear the heartbeat.” She uses the computer mouse to freeze the image, clicking one end of the tiny body and then the other.
I know how far along I am. I know exactly what night I got pregnant. The weekend Colton and I were traveling and I forgot my pills at home. I didn’t think it would matter.
I let her do her work and stare at the tiny human the screen that’ll grow into the biggest responsibility of my life.
She clicks again, and suddenly the room fills with a whoosh, whoosh that matches my racing heart. “That’s the sound of your blood flowing into the placenta.” She adjusts the wand, and I hear it—the shift in tempo, the faster beat.
My eyes fill with tears as the sound fills my ears and limbs. I can’t hear or comprehend anything else. It’s like the most intense surround sound of my life.
“Are you okay, Ellie?” she asks gently.
I nod. “It’s amazing.”