She laughed again. “I can’t wait. I’ll see you later.”
When I hung up the phone Ayden turned herself completely sideways in her seat and was staring at me like she had never seen me before.
“What?” I knew I sounded surly but I wasn’t ready to have her pick apart my complicated relationship with Royal. It wasn’t like I understood it well enough to offer up an explanation anyways.
“You’re in neck-deep with the cop, aren’t you? Since when do you agree to meet the parents?”
I was in way past my neck. “Pretty much in all the way over my head at this point, and I meet the parents when it matters.”
“Are you scared?” I remembered how hard and fast she had run from Jet when he decided she was the only one for him.
“I’m scared for her. I screw up everything that matters to me, but I’ve been nothing but honest with her and she’s still here. She keeps telling me I’m a risk worth taking.” Which meant I had to make a good impression on her mom, even if it meant dipping into my old bag of tricks. “Royal and her mom are really tight. It was just the two of them growing up, so the mom’s seal of approval would be nice.”
Ayden nodded. “You are a risk worth taking … and so is she. If you stop worrying about what might happen between the two of you and focus on what is happening, you’d be able to see it clear as day. I think you love her but you’re so caught up in the then and so worried about the when that you can’t even see the now.”
“I don’t have a clue how to love someone else, Ayd.”
She reached out and thumped me on the side of the head, which made me scowl as I pulled to a stop in front of the familiar house on Capitol Hill.
“Stop making excuses. You’re too smart for that, Asa. You love me, you love Mom even though she doesn’t deserve it, and I think, finally, after way too long, you are starting to love yourself a little bit. You can love Royal if you allow yourself to.”
Her eyes brightened as the front door to the house opened and a tall guy with messy dark hair and really tight, black jeans came out on the front steps. Jet Keller and all his rock-and-roll ways was not who I would have ever pictured being my sister’s soul mate, but it was there on every feature of her expressive face. He was it for her and always would be. I saw a smile tug at her mouth as she put a hand on the door before she turned back to look at me.
“Allow yourself to love someone fully, Asa. It’s what will finally set you free from the past. There’s no room for anything else, no space for all that regret and recrimination when you’re filled up with that kind of love. I know you said you woke up from that coma for me, but you haven’t been living, and I think Royal might be the one to finally give you a reason to start.”
She climbed out of the car and Jet started to come down the stairs toward her like the fifteen feet separating them was just too much to bear. I called Ayden’s name and she bent down to poke her head back inside the car.
“I miss you. I just want you to know that.”
She winked at me and I saw hands covered in heavy silver rings slide around her waist from behind.
“I miss you, too, but I think I’ll worry about you less after this trip.”
Jet bent down and told me hello, then hauled my sister out of the way and kissed her like he hadn’t seen her in weeks instead of hours. If that was what living looked like, I really had been doing it wrong for the last couple of years, and Ayden was right.
CHAPTER 16
Royal
I wasn’t really sure what had possessed me to ask Asa to meet my mother. I don’t know if it was the need I had to get him to see that this thing working between us was important, more important than anything he was trying to hold on to before, or if I was pulling one of his tricks and trying to see if he could handle my temperamental parent. Either way I knew I had ulterior motives for asking him to go with me, and considering he was smarter than anyone I had ever met, I knew he had to know that as well.
Even so, when I knocked on his apartment door right after work, still dressed in my uniform, he just leered at me and told me never in a million years did he ever think he would find a badge sexy. Then he kissed me hard enough to knock my hat off the top of my head and reminded me again that my handcuffs had more than one use. I just rolled my eyes and followed him to the 4Runner. One of these days I was going to surprise him and let him make good on all the wicked promises I saw in his amber gaze when he teased me about that particular tool of my trade.