The fog rose around me, dense and swirling, my hands barely visible as I raised them to my face. Where is he? Panic surged, my stomach in knots. I had to find him before it was too late. I had to tell him I didn’t mean for things to end, to push him away. I just wanted more of him.
I rushed forward, ignoring the instinct to go slow, my legs bumping unseen objects, my feet snagging on immobile things, tripping me up, making me stumble. Something slashed against my face, stinging like a small whip, opening my flesh, and yet I continued. I had to find him.
I switched direction, turning and turning again, uncertain of where to go, confusion clouding my brain, making me doubt each step. Where was he?
A howl echoed around me, followed by another and another.
I froze, my heart skidding to a halt as the fog suddenly cleared. I was in the forest and I was all alone.
“Cal!” I screamed. “Please come back to me.”
The door of my room swooshed open and I hastily wiped away the tears that seemed to be permanently sliding down my cheeks. Another nightmare had jolted me back to the hell of being awake. The feeling of losing Cal was so tremendously heavy in my gut and heart that I could hardly breathe.
I knew without looking that Candy had returned. The men had given up on me days ago.
“Hey, Morgan, I brought you up some of Ken’s fabulous chili. You’ve got to try it. He even baked homemade buns.”
I groaned and tightened the blanket over my head, not wanting to be rude, but also not wanting to have company. Hearing Candy slide the tray on my night table had me hoping that the girl would notice my cocooning, take the hint and leave.
Moments later, as the weight of another body bounced on the bed, I knew that I wouldn’t have such luck.
“Are you ever going to get out of bed?”
I sighed. I felt totally defeated. Cal had been gone so long that I’d almost grown used to the stabbing throb of his separation, the sudden jolts of physical pain that made me ache for him. Roll that in with my emotional turmoil and I was a blubbering mess most of the day.
Candy tugged at the blanket, pulling it away from my head. “Seriously, Morgan, you stink. You should at least have a shower,” she teased. “Come on, honey. The guys are all running around downstairs like it’s the plague up here. You go talk to her. No, you go talk to her. I’m not going up there, she’s crying. I don’t know what to do with a woman who’s crying.” Candy chuckled. “It’s pathetic. We need more women around this place.”
I stifled the urge to giggle. This was no time to laugh. I was depressed, damn it. But Candy caught my attempt to hide a smile and tugged the sheet even farther. I flopped over onto my back then pushed myself up to lean against the headboard. For that, I earned a giant grin from the teen.
“See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” She motioned to the food. “You should eat tonight. I’m serious about Ken’s chili. It’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever tasted.”
I wiped my hand over my face and briefly closed my eyes. With Cal gone, my world seemed to spin out of control. I couldn’t tell for sure if he had broken the bond, but assumed that he hadn’t since I still felt such tremendous pain. Not yet anyway. Shit, what’s he waiting for? My only hope at this point was that breaking the bond would numb the ache somewhat, take the edge off at least.
I sighed as I ran my hands through my lank, greasy hair. Candy was right. I needed a shower in the worst possible way. “Has anyone gotten a hold of him yet?”
Candy’s smile faded and she diverted her gaze to the floor. “Who, Cal?” She shook her head. “No. Andrew’s been leaving messages, but his phone’s off.”
My stomach clenched and the smell of Ken’s spectacular chili was enough to bring on a wave of nausea. “Has he done anything like this before?”
Candy shook her head again. “No, Cal’s pretty dependable.”
I nodded as fresh tears budded in my eyes. “I don’t think he’s broken the bond yet. I can still feel him and it hurts.” A stream of tears rolled down my cheeks. I’d gotten over being embarrassed about crying in front of everyone, but especially Candy. The teen had put in more girl time and shoulder support than any of my friends ever did back home. Candy reached out and snagged my hand, tugging me away from the headboard so that she could hug me.
“I know it hurts, Morgan,” she cooed gently.