She shook her head, her mouth curving into a humorless smile. “We aren’t a normal couple and this isn’t normal shit. This is dangerous and you know it. I can’t stop what’s happening to me and you…”
He stepped into her space, so close he breathed her into his lungs. So close the heat of his body radiated to her cooler one. He knew that was part of the reason the girls accepted him so readily. He was hot and they were always cold. Before his injuries, Pepper always burrowed close, now she wasn’t coming near him.
“We would have taken care of this problem a long time ago if you’d stopped hidin’ in the nursery,” he pointed out.
That rocked her, another body blow. “You almost died. Right in front of me, you almost died. It was terrifying. I tried to be so careful and follow orders, when all I wanted to do was lie next to you and hold you.”
“What the hell? Whose orders?” he demanded.
Nonny came in and took little Thym. She glared at Wyatt. “Not too old to wash out your mouth with soap, boy,” she cautioned. “Especially when you talk like that in front of the young’uns.”
“Sorry, Nonny,” he muttered because it was automatic, but his mind and his gaze didn’t leave Pepper. “Whose orders?” he repeated. His voice had dropped another octave. Low. Threatening.
She swallowed, frowning a little. He liked her frown. On her it was sexy. Especially the way she bit her lower lip. “Wyatt…”
“No one gives you orders but me. No one, Pepper. You’re not a member of the team, and you’re not Nonny’s child. You belong to me. No one else has the right to give you orders. No one tells you what to do. You have free will, Pepper. Even to tell me to go to hell if that’s what you want to do.” He was furious all over again, but for her not at her. “Now tell me who gave you the order to steer clear of me.”
A faint smile touched her mouth. “You just said no one can order me around, not even you, but you’ve got your bossy…”
“Mon Dieu. Fils de putain! Just fuckin’ tell me.” His head was going to explode.
“Trap. He did the surgery on you and he was worried about the wound in your chest. He said it was difficult and he didn’t want the little ones jostling you. I figured if they couldn’t, I couldn’t.”
She swept her hand through her hair, the action drawing his attention to her breasts. His cock jerked hard and her eyes dropped to the front of his jeans.
“You come to me when you’re like this. Always. I don’ give a damn what anyone else says. This is between us, no one else. They don’ know what’s right for us, what we both need.” His gaze burned into hers. “Make no mistake, Pepper, both of us have needs, not just you.”
“Because of me,” she said, desperation in her voice.
She was making him crazy. Totally crazy. She still was thinking about running from him. Intellectually he understood. She blamed herself for his crass, idiotic behavior, that it had everything to do with her and not with him. Emotionally, he didn’t understand at all. His cat DNA told him she belonged to him exclusively and she wasn’t damn well going to leave him. The man, the hot-blooded Cajun, wasn’t about to let the best thing he’d ever known walk out of his life.
He caught her wrist and turned, taking her with him down the hall. She tugged against his hold a couple of times, and he glared at her over his shoulder.
“Don’.” It was all the warning he was going to give her. They’d had the conversation.
Once inside his room, he slammed the door shut and hit all three locks. Three, because the little ones seemed adept at getting through locks and he hadn’t wanted any interruptions. He’d had Malichai install the locks the third day after he was knifed, expecting his woman to be sleeping in his bed.
He dropped her hand and leaned his back against the door. “You promised to talk to me. You gave me your word that we’d work things out. At the first sign of trouble – and we both know we’ll clash at times – you’re considerin’ runnin’ out on me.” It was an accusation, plain and simple.
Her long lashes swept down. Yeah. She’d not only considered it, she’d planned it. He forced himself to take a breath. He shook his head. “You really are clueless, aren’t you, Pepper? You have no idea of your own self-worth. You aren’t a weapon to me. You’re a woman. My woman. I’m going to act like a bastard sometimes. You need to learn how to defuse that shit.”
She pressed her lips together. His heart reacted. Clenched hard.
“I can’t make it stop. I tried everything. I tried staying as far away from the men as possible. I could see I was making them uncomfortable. They’ve all been good to me and they’re your friends, but I couldn’t make my body settle down. I noticed if I had physical contact of any kind, the most accidental, they winced and looked away from me. I can’t make it go away, Wyatt. I’m not doing that to you.”
“Damn it all, woman, I make it go away. That was the deal we had. You come to me when you even start to get uncomfortable and I handle it.”