The Long Utopia

Hackett pulled away, eyes narrow, frowning. But Luis was surprised when, for the first time in Luis’s memory, he deferred to Burdon’s leadership.

 

Radcliffe affected mock surprise. ‘You, Mr Burdon, the famous gold-miner of California, scared of a bit of shut-in? Surely not.’

 

‘Occupational hazard. Well. Are you servin’ us tea? Why not take it here?’ He glanced around at the beefy servants. ‘I imagine these fellows are discreet. There’s no reason you want us down there, is there?’

 

Radcliffe gave way. He invited them to sit.

 

In short order a flunkey showed up with tea, another bulky fellow. As the man poured, Burdon murmured to Luis, ‘I never thought to see such fine china handled by a gorilla’s mitt like that.’

 

Now Radcliffe asked for their reports on Bismarck’s Berlin.

 

When it was his turn Luis described the cover he’d devised. ‘I posed as a theatrical entrepreneur, studying local acts with an eye to booking them for the English theatres. I took a room on the Unter den Linden, from where I had every excuse to stroll past the Prinz Carl Palace, and the ministries on the Wilhelmstrasse …’ All this was by way of summary; they had all had to submit detailed written reports, including sketch maps. It had been enough for Luis to have inspected these great buildings from the outside; the others had Waltzed their way inside on more penetrating spying missions.

 

When they had all reported, Radcliffe nodded. ‘Good, good. Now, I wonder if you have guessed why we have ordered such a mission. And why it had to be you three, the very apex of the pyramid of your Knights of Discorporea,’ and he said the words as if they were ashes in his mouth.

 

‘That’s not hard to guess,’ Hackett said sternly. ‘I think you mean to strike at Bismarck himself.’

 

Luis was astonished by this allegation. But Radcliffe did not flinch.

 

And Hackett continued relentlessly, ‘I can even guess at the logic.’

 

‘Go on.’

 

‘To avert a European war. We all remember the poor Prince with his dreams of unifying Europe under a drowsy dynasty – he married his and Victoria’s eldest daughter to the crown prince of Prussia to achieve just that end. Well, that didn’t wash with Bismarck. Now you have this tremendous brute of a German dog prowling around a European back yard that has been more or less at peace, as we all know, since the downfall of Napoleon. And in Bismarck you face a man ruthless and determined and of tremendous political and strategic skill—’

 

‘Who might be the ruin of us all,’ Radcliffe said, nodding. ‘And who, as you say, has terminated a half-century of relative peace on continental Europe with a terrible war, and he and his successors might spark off more before the hash is settled. No, the man has to go before he does any more harm, and spends any more lives. Which is where you gentlemen take the stage.’

 

Hackett nodded thoughtfully. ‘Well, this is a step up from the Underground Rail Road, and your petty bits of spying. Even compared to the time you had us go into Sebastopol during the siege.’

 

Luis raised his eyebrows; he hadn’t heard of that one.

 

Burdon gave Radcliffe a mocking smile. ‘But what exactly is it you would have us do? Abduction, assassination? Of the German Chancellor? Are you serious? Do you expect us to believe that Her Majesty’s government would stoop to such a tactic? This isn’t some Balkan principality, you know. And besides, such an act would probably destabilize all Europe and bring us to war even faster than Bismarck with all his scheming ever could.’

 

Radcliffe kept calm. ‘It is the will of Her Majesty.’

 

‘Phooey,’ said Burdon. ‘Produce her and let her tell us so herself.’

 

Hackett seemed appalled. ‘Have some respect, man.’

 

Radcliffe stood. ‘If only you would come to the archive, I could explain the scheme better. We have documentation – maps – reports – it is already an expensive and carefully considered operation.’

 

Burdon said, ‘Determined to get us down in that hole in the ground, aren’t you?’

 

Radcliffe took a breath. ‘Also there is someone waiting to see you there. You met a prime minister once before, in Lord John Russell, many years ago. And now—’

 

Burdon laughed out loud. ‘You expect us to believe that you persuaded old Gladstone, not just to support your bonkers scheme, but to turn up in person and sit in some cellar waiting on the likes of us?’

 

Hackett seemed confused. ‘It does sound rather unlikely, Mr Radcliffe. If you would care to clarify—’

 

But Burdon cut him off. He stood, facing Radcliffe. ‘All I would care to clarify is that this meeting is over. Ta-ta, Radcliffe, and thanks for the tea. Now if you’ll show us back to our brougham—’

 

‘Now,’ Radcliffe said softly.

 

Luis, still sitting, sensed rather than heard the massive form step up behind him. Then it was as if a thunderclap went off inside his head. He was aware of two, maybe three powerful men grabbing him and flinging him to the ground.

 

Terry Pratchett & Stephen Baxter's books