The Girl Who Dared to Think 7: The Girl Who Dared to Fight

“Liana,” Quess interrupted, his tone heavy and hesitant. I shifted around in the chair to look at him, and found him staring at his shoes, a pained expression on his face.

The hairs on the back of my neck rose as I realized his reticence to talk earlier wasn’t about Leo. There was something more going on. My heart skipped a beat when he chanced a glance up at me, his dark blue eyes filled with horror and… guilt. Quess was feeling guilty about something, but what? And why the theatrics?

“What is it?” I demanded. He shifted his weight and continued to fidget, his nervous delay causing my anxiety to grow. I glanced over at Maddox to find her gaze still fixed to the table, her mouth turned down as if she had tasted something awful. “What’s wrong? Is it Tian? Is she o—”

“It’s Zoe,” Quess whispered, his voice breaking on her name. I whirled back toward him and then stood up, panic growing at the dark way he had said my best friend’s name.

“No,” I whispered, shaking my head when I saw remorse glittering in his eyes. “No, she’s okay. I saw her between Maddox and Eric. She was safe between them; they wouldn’t let anything happen to her.”

I looked over to Maddox for her confirmation, and found the raven-haired girl pressing her hand over her mouth, on the verge of tears. I took a step away, knocking the chair to the ground, and shook my head harder, as if I could shake away this reality and what they were telling me. “No,” I repeated, when nothing about them changed, trying to will it to be so. “She’s not dead. Quess, tell me she’s not dead.”

Quess met my gaze, his eyes shimmering with tears. “She’s not dead,” he said grimly. “She’s dying. And I… I can’t save her, Liana.”





32





“No,” I repeated adamantly, trying to refuse the defeat I saw on their faces. It was starting to scare me, make me believe they were telling the truth, but they couldn’t be. Zoe had to be all right—she was my best friend. They were lying. They had to be. It was a sick joke.

Quess and Maddox would never do that to you, a small voice inside of me whispered, and I took a step back, as if I could reject even having the thought. It didn’t matter that they hadn’t done so before. They had to be doing it now. Zoe couldn’t be dying.

I tried to get the words out, but all I could seem to get out was a litany of noes that grew more panicked as the expressions of my friends remained unchanged.

Finally, I couldn’t take looking at them anymore, and turned my back to them, already searching the small apartment for my best friend, determined to show them they were wrong. “Zoe?” I called, my voice coming out small and thin through the tightness in my throat. I took a few staggering steps forward, toward the living area, and saw Tian’s familiar blond form curled up on a couch, tucked in tight next to where Liam was sleeping sitting up, one arm curled protectively around the young girl, and a baton within reach. No sign of Zoe or Eric, and the two young people remained sleeping in spite of my call.

I ignored them, turning back toward the hall, toward the closed bedroom door that I had walked by earlier. She was there, probably just sleeping. I’d open it up for Quess and Maddox and show them that she was just fine.

I started hobbling toward it but reared back when Quess suddenly stepped in front of me, his face a tight mask. “Get out of my way,” I grated out. “I don’t know what trick you’re playing, but Zoe is just fine.”

My voice broke on the last part, and suddenly, I realized that deep down inside, I believed them. They weren’t lying. I’d never actually thought they were. I had only wanted them to be.

A cry escaped my lips, and I cupped my hand over it, taking a step away from him. “Please tell me it’s a joke,” I begged as tears started clouding my vision. “Please, please…”

My chest started to shake as his face only grew more and more broken, and I began to sob. “Nooooo,” I keened, unable to stop myself. All I could think of was my best friend in the world, the way she had laughed at my jokes and made me feel accepted in a world that had rejected me. She was everything to me—at the center of me. I loved her as much as I loved my brother, as much as I loved Grey and Leo…

Quess crossed over to me and threw his arms around me, holding me tight, and I sobbed against his chest, unable to accept that my friend was dying.

“What happened?” I croaked out, needing to know.

“The sentinel that attacked you,” Maddox said, her voice thick with tears. “You went down and… it was going to kill you. Just step on you like you were nothing. But Zoe got in the way. She saw you go down and just… ran to help you.”

My grief and pain grew tenfold as I realized that I had caused yet another one of my friends’ deaths. First Roark and Cali, then Dylan and Rose, now Zoe. I wasn’t worth it. I didn’t deserve it. Everything I’d done had made things worse, and now I was going to lose my best friend as a result.

“The impact damaged almost all of her inner organs,” Quess said when Maddox stopped talking. “I thought she was fine. She was up and moving almost a moment later, but once we got down here to look at you, she collapsed. I scanned her and found small holes in her spleen, her liver, her intestines—too many for me to repair without the use of a surgical bay and a microlaser, and the one in the Citadel is offline, so she’s just been… slowly bleeding to death. I’ve been periodically draining her inner cavity to alleviate the pressure, but it’s just… slowing everything down.”

“Quess,” Maddox cut in harshly, and I wasn’t sure if I should be grateful to her or not. Quess’s list of Zoe’s injuries had only twisted the dagger of guilt stabbing through me, each wound more evidence of how I had failed her—how I had failed all of them—and yet I needed to know what was wrong with her, if only because I secretly hoped he would say something that would spark an idea for how to save her.

“I’m sorry,” Quess said, immediately contrite. “I’m just… I should be able to save her! If we were in the Medica, I could save her!”

“You said we can’t move her, and she doesn’t want to be moved,” Maddox said tiredly. “And it’s a good thing we didn’t go to the Medica, if Sage is really behind everything! What we need to do is move on him. If we can end this, maybe we can get Zoe some help!”

“She doesn’t have that long!” Quess replied, his voice breaking. “As it is…”

I pulled away from him, pushing back my tears enough to meet his gaze. “How long?” I whispered.

His jaw trembled for a second, his eyes filling with tears. “Not long,” he replied.

I had to see her. I had to tell her how sorry I was, and… I wasn’t sure, but it was a good place to start. “Where is she?” I demanded.

“Bedroom,” he replied. “Eric’s with her now, but you should go see her. She’s… She’s been real worried about you.”

My stomach flipped at his words, and I damn near dissolved into tears again at the urgency in his voice. This was my last chance to talk to my friend—the last chance I’d ever have—and I wasn’t sure I could handle it.

But for Zoe, I would do anything.

I nodded for Quess’s benefit, and he moved to one side, giving me access to the hall. I started walking down it, but suddenly the candlelit area had become dark and foreboding, filled with shadows and the presence of death. For half a second, I was certain that if I could just shine a bright enough light down the hall, I would scare Death off and save Zoe. But then reality crashed in, reminding me that there was no easy fix for death.

Good guys and bad guys die all the same, and nothing ever turns out like the stories.